so how do you get to a place in your life where
this is true. and this seems to be my downfall. i guess i'm just so desperate for that "one special person" that when i finally get to a place in my life where i feel i can trust people again i end up trusting to the nth degree. overlooking all their faults and whatnot because i know that every person and every relationship is not perfect. i seem to make excuses because it just feels so good to get attention from someone, anyone ~ even if they aren't "quite right" for me.
You need to turn the attention to Positive attention to yourself !!
Your neat, Your Special & You love you is the things you need to tell yourself right now. Then use that positive attention when you choose Friends that are good at giving it ,know that you want it,go for it then take the time to absorb it !! So with that being said Forgive yourself , give attention to yourself , then work on them friends.
Your neat, Your Special & You love you is the things you need to tell yourself right now. Then use that positive attention when you choose Friends that are good at giving it ,know that you want it,go for it then take the time to absorb it !! So with that being said Forgive yourself , give attention to yourself , then work on them friends.
HELLO THERE,
I had to chime in.I know your pain and frustrations.I came from a place where as a child I was physically abused as a child (I don't mean spankings,I mean abuse as in 10 whippings at a time with a thick board with bruises on my but so bad a teacher embarrassed me in class)as far back as I can remember when I was 5 or 6 by my father up until I was at least 15 years old.I was raped at 7,14,18 and 21 years old by my uncle,my step-brother,and 2 ex boyfriends.I was molested when I was 9 by my other uncle.My parents divorced when I was 14 (by the way my parents were pot smokers and drug dealers).I never received any help until I was 14 when I tried to kill myself.At this point I felt it was my only option.understand that I didn't know of any God at this point.I had been hospitalized four times by the time I was 15.After that my mother put me in juvenile because I was so resentful because she stayed with my dad and allowed it I took a bedpost to her (I don't remember this I think I blacked out she told me later what I did).Then to make matters worse she married a guy that hated me and my sisters when I was 16.He made our life a living hell,literally.He mentally and emotionally tore us down.So when I got the strength to tell him off, I did in which it caused my mom to finally turn me over to the state of Alabama."She" had enough.I was then 16 ears old.I went into several group homes far away from the sisters I had protected all these years.I finally settled in on one group home in Birmingham till I was 18.My maternal grandmother took me in at 18 (a little too late) and she continued to mentally tear me down because she would tell me that my mom(her own daughter) didn't love me.I then tried to kill myself with meds.Doctors say the amount alone should have killed me and that God must have a purpose for me.This is when I found our Lord and Savior,Jesus Christ.I had 80% of medication in my body.I took about 4 different kinds of medications.at this point I trusted no one but God.I finally met a guy that I married at 18.(Judge told me I was emancipated because I got married and I was an adult now no more group homes it would be jail time next)He treated me like crap.He cheated on me. But I also realized I was too young to have gotten married and I was also too immature.( I still hadn't dealt with my issues and baggage yet)We ended our marriage.I was 20.I then met up with my high school crush and we had a daughter.he left me 4 months pregnant because my money ran out.Anytime I had money he came running back and when it was gone so was he.I allowed this to happen to me and my daughter because I was "in love".Then I met a guy through my daughter's aunt (on paternal side)that I wished I had never met because he is the one who raped me when I was 21.He also was damaging my daughters' stomach (doctor said he didn't do nothing to hurt her)he would squeeze her stomach he said so she could go to the bathroom.He then beat the crap out of me one day when we were to be going to six flags all because my mother said she needed diapers for my daughter(Thank God she was with my mom and not me at the time)I had severe lacerations to my body and contusions in the back of my head and my face and hands were all bruised up.He went to jail for it and I have not been in contact with him since court.Then I met a wonderful man who is now my DH.I put my guards up with him in the beginning and put him to the test in bad ways.( I done the cheating first) Needless to say I let my guard down because we had four children over the years.I had to Give it all up to God for me to be healed and everything else fell into place.I started forgiving the people in my life that abused me in every way.I took the power back from them and because of that I am a stronger person today.They no longer "own" me.God is a very forgiven God and through Jesus Christ he forgives us for our sins no matter what it is.And because of that I can forgive everybody too! That doesn't mean I can let people walk all over me it just simply means I am wiser and know better and God will take care of those who do the things they aren't suppose to.Just wanted to share my experience hope this helps! Have Blessed Day!!!! Remember God helps those who helps themselves.
P.S. Please everybody don't think I am crazy for posting my life here I just felt compelled to share my story.Judge not less less Ye be Judged!-God
With God's Great Love,
Brandy
I had to chime in.I know your pain and frustrations.I came from a place where as a child I was physically abused as a child (I don't mean spankings,I mean abuse as in 10 whippings at a time with a thick board with bruises on my but so bad a teacher embarrassed me in class)as far back as I can remember when I was 5 or 6 by my father up until I was at least 15 years old.I was raped at 7,14,18 and 21 years old by my uncle,my step-brother,and 2 ex boyfriends.I was molested when I was 9 by my other uncle.My parents divorced when I was 14 (by the way my parents were pot smokers and drug dealers).I never received any help until I was 14 when I tried to kill myself.At this point I felt it was my only option.understand that I didn't know of any God at this point.I had been hospitalized four times by the time I was 15.After that my mother put me in juvenile because I was so resentful because she stayed with my dad and allowed it I took a bedpost to her (I don't remember this I think I blacked out she told me later what I did).Then to make matters worse she married a guy that hated me and my sisters when I was 16.He made our life a living hell,literally.He mentally and emotionally tore us down.So when I got the strength to tell him off, I did in which it caused my mom to finally turn me over to the state of Alabama."She" had enough.I was then 16 ears old.I went into several group homes far away from the sisters I had protected all these years.I finally settled in on one group home in Birmingham till I was 18.My maternal grandmother took me in at 18 (a little too late) and she continued to mentally tear me down because she would tell me that my mom(her own daughter) didn't love me.I then tried to kill myself with meds.Doctors say the amount alone should have killed me and that God must have a purpose for me.This is when I found our Lord and Savior,Jesus Christ.I had 80% of medication in my body.I took about 4 different kinds of medications.at this point I trusted no one but God.I finally met a guy that I married at 18.(Judge told me I was emancipated because I got married and I was an adult now no more group homes it would be jail time next)He treated me like crap.He cheated on me. But I also realized I was too young to have gotten married and I was also too immature.( I still hadn't dealt with my issues and baggage yet)We ended our marriage.I was 20.I then met up with my high school crush and we had a daughter.he left me 4 months pregnant because my money ran out.Anytime I had money he came running back and when it was gone so was he.I allowed this to happen to me and my daughter because I was "in love".Then I met a guy through my daughter's aunt (on paternal side)that I wished I had never met because he is the one who raped me when I was 21.He also was damaging my daughters' stomach (doctor said he didn't do nothing to hurt her)he would squeeze her stomach he said so she could go to the bathroom.He then beat the crap out of me one day when we were to be going to six flags all because my mother said she needed diapers for my daughter(Thank God she was with my mom and not me at the time)I had severe lacerations to my body and contusions in the back of my head and my face and hands were all bruised up.He went to jail for it and I have not been in contact with him since court.Then I met a wonderful man who is now my DH.I put my guards up with him in the beginning and put him to the test in bad ways.( I done the cheating first) Needless to say I let my guard down because we had four children over the years.I had to Give it all up to God for me to be healed and everything else fell into place.I started forgiving the people in my life that abused me in every way.I took the power back from them and because of that I am a stronger person today.They no longer "own" me.God is a very forgiven God and through Jesus Christ he forgives us for our sins no matter what it is.And because of that I can forgive everybody too! That doesn't mean I can let people walk all over me it just simply means I am wiser and know better and God will take care of those who do the things they aren't suppose to.Just wanted to share my experience hope this helps! Have Blessed Day!!!! Remember God helps those who helps themselves.
P.S. Please everybody don't think I am crazy for posting my life here I just felt compelled to share my story.Judge not less less Ye be Judged!-God
With God's Great Love,
Brandy
wow. honey i am so sorry for all that you've had to endure. and i can honestly say that *my* problems seriously pale in comparison to yours so thank you for sharing your journey and for putting things into perspective for me. now, that doesn't mean that i am "healed" yet but i do understand that it isn't all about "me".
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