Christian Bear

An atheist is walking through the woods one day when all of a sudden a huge bear runs out to attack him. The atheist runs as fast as he can but trips over a stump and falls to the ground. As he turns rover the bear is standing on top of him, paws stretched wide ready to maul him.

“Oh God” screams the atheist.

Suddenly time stands still, the bear freezes in the attack position and a voice out of heaven says “Yes, you called?”

“Oh” says the atheist “you really do exist! Can you make this bear go away?”

“Why should I?” says God. “You’ve been denying my existence all your life”

“Fair point” says the atheist. “Ok, how about this. Can you turn the bear into a Christian instead?”

“Ok” says God and time resumes once more. The bear stops in attack, bows his head meekly and says “Dear God. Thank you for what I am about to receive…”