The Prodigal Fat Girl Returns

I feel like I have SO much to say, and so few words actually available to me.

I started my journey way back in 2003, after a lifetime of being fat.  I had a very long two year wait to even just get an appointment to TALK to a surgeon.. I actually had forgotten all about it, and had changed my phone number during that time. My only saving grace was that I had given my friend's number as a back up.

I went to see Dr. Davey, and together that we decided on the RNY.  My weight at the time was 389lbs.  Truthfully it was so long ago that I don't remember the actual time frame, but I went through testing of all sorts, lot of dietician's appointments etc.

I was originally scheduled for surgery August 9th, 2005 but there was a cancellation and they asked me if I wanted to come in June 13th.  I jumped at the chance.

My weight declined, very quickly at first (30lbs in the first month!!) and then slowed somewhat but stayed steady.  I amended my diet to healthier choices, and this was helped by the severe restriction of the amount of food I was able to eat.

In 2008 I had a Panni, and that changed the shape of my body considerably.... although I had lost weight, the skin does not go back to what is should be as many people know... especially at the weight I was at, for so long.

My lowest weight was about 176lbs.  And while not IDEAL, I was comfortable there.  I felt good, and I felt like I looked good, especially after being so obese for so long.  

So now it's been 7 years.  The weight is slowly creeping back on, a little at a time.  I have adjusted to eating again, and although I still can't eat HUGE amounts, I can eat more than originally after surgery, and I instincively know which foods will go down well.  As we've heard time and again.. I learned to eat 'around' my surgery.... and I SWORE if I was given this chance I would not do that.  I thought for SURE it wouldn't be me to regain the weight.

But alas.  The last time I stepped on the scale I was 267lbs.  I've seen it slowly creep up... month by month.  Two years ago I was at 180 and I chastized myself and started going back to the gym.. and tried to eat better..... and it worked for a while.....but I am truly back where I never wanted to be again. 

Fat and miserable.

I'm looking into a revision.  I was SO hoping to go with the DS but I can see that very few doctors do the DS in Alberta, let alone revisions.  If anyone can point me in the right direction that would be helpful.

In the meantime, while I'm researching, I'm hoping to offer any insight I can if needed.  I feel like I abandoned this support network when 'the going got good'... but isn't that always the way?

Much love,

Ruby.

Ruby;,
thank you for writing this post.  I am just starting my research into the possibility of surgery and I think that my biggest fear is of regaining the weight.  Did you have support after your surgery? why do you think you are in the same situation again?  I question why I am in this overweight  situation now and know that I need to solve the mental issue first or as I go along in my weight loss journey.
thanks again for the insight.
c

Hi there!

I didn't have any personal support after my surgery.  My relationship ended within six months of surgery.. although that wasn't the reason for it. 

Medically the people at weight wise are AMAZING.  They really do offer you everything you need medically and informationally. 

I think the one thing that I would do differently is get into some regular personal councelling... my eating comes from emotion.. I know this to be true.  I think that would have helped me keep the weight off.. because I still do have the tool, I just didn't take every opportunity afforded to me and that's MY fault.  

I'm considering joing Overeaters anonamous or another group like that... to see if that will help me learn why I comfort the way I do with food.  And that's really why I'm back in this situation again.  I didn't deal with the HEAD part.. only the physical part.  And once I started to lose weight I actually FELT happy for the first time in forever... so I thought that everything was okay.

Even though I had read it over and over.... I didn't pay attention.  The weight loss will NOT make your problems go away.  Once you start feeling better about yourself you'll think you don't need help with the overeating (if that is, indeed your reason too)... and then it's possible to end up like me.. 7 years later and back where I started.  

I don't regret getting the surgery.  It wasn't easy.  But it did truly change my life. 

R.

 have you contacted Weight Wise again?

when I met with my surgeon (for the sleeve) he said that if i didnt lose as much weight as I wanted i could always come back for a revision....I would contact them and see what they say, they would know the doctors that do it.

good luck!

 Just seen this on Dr Sharma's facebook

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLw2YXLagkM  

talks about revision surgeries...

Go to www.livingafterwls.com and try the 5dpt.  It`s a 5 day `test`to get you back to experiencing good wls eating.  Most people get a weight loss from it, and it `tightens`the stomach and helps you kick the carbs.  They are what cause most people to regain - the bread, potatoes, rice, crackers, etc.  Continue after the 5dpt to the day 6 and beyond and you should notice a large difference in your life!

 The pouch test didn't work for me, I tried about a year ago. The problem is far
More than just 'eating right' otherwise I wouldn't have needed
This surgery in the first place. Maybe im just weak :(

I watched the video it doesn't talk too much about revisions. 

I did call weight wise. You need a referral from your gp to get to
The revision clinic so I'm going to do that shortly. 
IT does seem like the wait times are less significant though which is encouraging. 

If restriction isn't the answer, maybe it would be helpful to work with a psychologist to get a handle on emotional eating? Or - is it possible something else is going on, like drug interaction or a chemical or hormonal imbalance?

Excuse me if I sound dumb, but what would an RNY revise to? I know a sleeve can revise to an RNY or a band to sleeve or RNY, but I thought an RNY was sort of the "big gun" surgery here.

 I suppose I mid spoke. Restriction is super helpful but it seems just to be a waiting game
For me. As soon as I can fit more in, I do. I've been in therapy and it has helped me in every
Aspect of my life but this one. Very frustrating. I know it can be revised to DS but as mentioned
No one here does them. I also know you can revise again to RNY. Making everything smaller 
And shorter. More restriction, less absorption. It will be something I'll be asking the surgeon about. I was hoping to find someone who had gone through it. :(

Thank you for explaining. I think I understand a little better now. I sure hope the people at the clinic can find a way to help you.