Not what I expected/hoped, but I think I'll be ok

My appointment with Dr Sharma did not go as expected/hoped for, and I'll be forever grateful that my husband was with me. (And for the kind young lady what was with Dr Sharma who gave me kleenex as they left)

I'm still processing what he told me, but it boiled down to him saying that the surgery risks are too high when balanced against my best possible sustainable weight loss.

He was all that is kind and patient as he explained that when you factor in my age, the amount I've lost up 'til now (15% of my original weight - he says 20% is considered very successful WITH surgery), and the fact that I'm finding my current calorie limits pretty easy to stay within (which tells him I'm not running a huge deficit) surgery isn't a good option for me. It would only make sense to do surgery if I was running a bigger deficit, since they don't want people to have to eat at starvation level to lose weight and maintain the loss.

I'm going to keep following the food plan my dietitian laid out and increasing exercise in fun forms - my weight loss will end when my intake balances my metabolism. Not anywhere near where I'd like to end, but at a level I can maintain for life.

The clinic isn't abandoning me, they're going to give me the same aftercare I'd have got if I'd had surgery, so I can finish my journey wherever it goes and learn to maintain the loss and health improvements.

Kelly-Anne

 I am sorry that it did not turn out the way you had planned. I am amazed by your good attitude though. I should take lessons from you!

I am so sorry that things didn't go the way you had hoped.  It's wonderful that your husband was there to support you!  I think it's amazing that they are going to continue to support you in your journey.  The WW program is pretty unique.  Your attitude is really great, congratulations!  I hope your journey goes well...

Jenn

Thanks Jenn.

I'm hoping that I'll lose more, since I'm still going down a pound or so each week - maybe the extra 15 he says I'd have lost with surgery or even a few more. I'm going to keep on my eating plan (basically just making it my permanent way of eating) and bump up the exercise a bit, and see where I level off.

I moved my goal to 200 (a girl can dream, right?) and we'll see where I land.

Kelly-Anne

Thanks. I've done my share of crying about it, but he IS one of the top people in the world when it comes to bariatric medicine, so I have to accept his judgement.

He did say one thing that helped a LOT. If I can maintain my loss (or lose a little more) over the next 6 months they'll refer me to have my pannis removed. I may not be happy with my weight, but I truly hate my pannis, so I really appreciate his kindness in that area.

My husband is being wonderful. We bought him a bike on our way home (we bought me one last week and I'm loving it!) and we're going to explore the city bike paths together. We're also going to look into ballroom dancing lessons - something we've talked about for years.

Kelly-Anne

Hi, Please let me know how the consulation goes with Dr, Farries and what you think of him.
Good Luck. I wish you the best.

Kelly-Anne,
  You are a rockstar!  Great attitude despite the disappointment today.  Keep up the fight and I am sure you will succeed.  I am here if you ever need to vent or just get things off your chest.  I think you will surpass your 200 only because you want to, not because someone told you its a good number.

So proud of you!

Deanne

Thanks Deanne,
I admit I hope my loss continues for awhile yet. My philosophy has become that I can't control the scale, but I can control what I put in my mouth and whether I sit on my bum all day. There will come a point where my metabolism plus the amount of exercise I'm willing to do will cross the amount of food I need to eat to be healthy. (Dr Sharma says right about what I eat now) At that point my loss will stop and it'll be time for me to choose to be content.

If I'd known what to do when I was younger and my metabolism higher I'd have had better results, but there's no point in kicking myself now. And hey - I'm sure my pannis weighs at least 10# - it's going to be fabulous to be free of it!

I sure hope you get your call soon. I know you're eager to get on with your journey.

Hey there Kelly!



How old are you??? Is he saying that he feels you can do it on your own with diet and exercise? What are the risks??

Hugs

Donna

I'm 54. I don't FEEL old most days, but reality is that the older you are the less calories you need for maintenance.

No, he doesn't think I can do it on my own, at least, he doesn't think it's possible for me to lose MUCH more, with or without surgery. He said that if they'd done the surgery a year ago, when I was 303, they'd have expected me to end up at about 240, and that if they did it now I'd likely only end up losing about 15-20 more pounds.

He asked if I was prepared for dealing with all of the risks and difficulties of surgery (we all know surgery isn't the easy way = there's pain, huge lifestyle changes, and possibility of surgical complications) for only 15 pounds. I don't think many of us would go through surgery for only 15#, right?

So, it sucked, and I cried, and he kindly offered to deal with the single part of my body I truly hate if I can maintain what I've done so far for 6 months.

I WILL be doing my best to lose more, but if he's right, and I have no good reason to not believe him, it won't be a LOT more.

I don't know how useful it is to talk a lot about risks since every person is different. I'm sure everyone facing the surgeries has had to talk to their doctor about them and how high any one risk is for THAT person - and if the potential result is worth those risks.

I'd face a fair amount of risk to lost another 100#, but not much at all for only 15# that I could possibly lose just by continuing to do what I'm doing now.

Kelly-Anne