Other People's Attitudes

I wonder if anyone else has to deal with this......

My family is beginning to **** me off... During my whole journey, they have been my biggest supporters. They encourage me, praise me, and generally help my soul..... but now that I'm getting close to goal weight, they're telling me to stop!!!

They claim that I don't want to be 'too skinny' (when did I EVER say that?). I KNOW what I want.... but it's what do 'they' want???

I know that my Mom (as much as I love her) is worried that I will be lighter and skinnier than she is... and that makes her a tiny bit jealous.... I'm really guessing here but I think my family is so accustomed to seeing me as a very large person and now that I'm not that person any longer, they are getting worried that I might change and be a different person.

I can't argue that I've changed, because I certainly have.... I no longer go to food to 'cure' my emotional woes and my attitude about food has done a complete 'about face'. But I'M still the same person... just in a smaller size....

I, desperately, need to complete the job that I've set out for myself and reach my goal weight. I don't think it's too much to ask for... this will be the first task (for myself) that I will EVER have completed and I really want to do it... it just seems that now that my goal is finally within reach, my family is trying to get me to stop...???? Does this make sense??

I started out at 388.8 lbs and now I'm at 192 lbs.... a HUGE difference in my life... so I don't think that having a goal weight of 160 - 170 lbs to be too much... If I reach 160 lbs... then I have about a 10 lb 'cushion' for the maintenance stage when I could regain some of it...

What does everyone else think?? I thought I had the support of my family, but lately it seems that no one is happy with me for wanting to continue loosing weight...

I would, greatly, appreciate any insight or suggestions. Even if you disagree with me...

Melody

Hi Melody,
  what you are describing sounds like it could be really frustrating.  I think you are best to stick to your guns.   This isn't about them, it is about you.  Like many of us that have struggled with weight all of our lives we are very good at taking care of everyone around us and ignoring ourselves.  I've had many people make suggestions on what route they think I should take...and trust me very few of them believe surgery is the right one...but my standard response to them has become "that's why this isn't for you...it's for me".  I have embedded that in my brain somewhere and the resolve is strong at this point.  My husband's family has been exhibiting some of the same behaviour you are describing and I've said to them that if they can't be supportive then they can't be around me.  I realize that is easier with in-laws than your own blood but do what is right for you.  Listen to your body and get to that goal that you have worked so hard to achieve!  Find the support wherever you can and embrace it.  Let the rest slide!  I know easier said than done but trust that you have many people on here that believe you can do it...look at what you have accomplished so far for goodness sake!

Deanne

Hold your head up high and finish what it is that you have started. Ignore what other say or politely say Thanks for noticing my weight loss but I'll determine when I'm at a comfortable weight.
I think it's so funny cause I have heard so many times in my life that Oh she's such a pretty girl if only she could lose the weight and then recently I've heard oh my look at the weight she's got gone, she looks so sick. Frig it ****** me off too. I'm doing this for me as you are doing it for you and I think it's important to remember it's for us and not them.
Good Luck and I hope it gets easier for you.
Kee.

Melody
I think we must all go through this.  I too have had the same issues.  I have some wonderful friends who have been there for me and encouraging all the way. Family is another story.  Some are great about it but I have noticed peoples attitudes have changed towards me.  I  too am the same person maybe a little happier and alot more healthy.  As one friend told me they maybe do not like to see you succeeding at something they are failing at.  I believe this is true.
I am also tired of people saying to me you have lost alot of weight and then expecting me to give them all the details.  I told very few people I was having surgery.
You started out very close to what I was at the beginning, so you are actually giving me hope that I can also get to where you are.
Your body will know when enough is enough and so long at you  are feeling good and heathy(the clinic will soon tell you if you are not)  to heck with everyone else and do what is right for you.  YOu have put in the hard work and made all the necessary changes to get here.  Way to go.
Also be glad they have something to be jealous about and in time they will get over it if not you are still the better person.
Take care and good luck
Karen