Ok People...

So I got brave.  I posted a fugly picture of me as I barely fit in the airplane seats two years ago when we went to Nova Scotia.  I wasn't going to...but then I thought hey, I need to look at that picture to remind myself why I am 'giving up' my comfort and my addiction.  I need to see that I don't want to turn heads because I am fat, but I do want to turn them because I look good.  I need to look at her and remind myself just how miserable I felt having to ask for a seatbelt extender.  I need to remember how embarassed I was when my hubby and my kids asked why I needed that.  I need to remember that there was no room between me and the person in front of me because I never want to be her again!  I have lost 49lbs since then.  Not a tonne, but enough for me to see the changes in myself already.  And that is only going to get better with time and the surgery.

I have been rather discouraged lately.  It seems that no matter how much I exercise or how little or much I eat that scale does not want to budge.  Up a few, down a few.  I wanted to be well out of the 300's by now, and yet here I sit. Grr...but I am not going to let that scale win.  Who cares if it ever budges.  I feel better lately and I must focus on how I feel , not on the number.  That is what is important.  Ultimatly that is why I am doing this...to feel better and be healthier and more active!

So to make a long story short you can check out my picture...just make sure you do it on an empty stomach or have a bucket handy!  LOL!  (just kidding)

HEY!! Be nice... That's MY friend you are talking about!

No one starts this journey being particularly happy with who they are at the beginning. We live in a society that blames us for not being smart enough, strong enough or enough enough to have the willpower to overcome our food cravings, too lazy to get out and go for a walk, all these completly silly things that totally miss the mark on what is actually going on in us!

I am an emotional eater. I gave up smoking and I ate everything I saw for two years. I hide behind my weight because I can handle the rejection from people based on it- afterall, I've been fat my whole life... I know how to handle people judging me on my weight. I can't handle people judging me based on me, on the real me.

I know everytime I pull into a drive thru and make a bad choice that I am making those choices and disregarding my health and wellbeing.

You have lost 49 lbs! Do you realize how amazing that is? That was three times in weigh****chers and once at LA Weight Loss for me to combine my weight loss atempts to have come up with 49 lbs. The most I have ever lost is 37 lbs. So Celebrate that you have 49lbs less weight on your frame!

I am proud of you and I know you are struggling at the moment, I can only say "Hang in there buddy!"

Hey hey....enough of that gibber gabber....

We ALL started out big, fat, ugly, depressed, sometimes lonely, upset, discouraged, laughed at, teased...etc etc...

NOBODY in this forum can say different.  You are in good company.

You are taking the right path to eliminate all of the above...and I am SOOOO proud of you for that!

You are almost at the point of seeing the surgeon...you have jumped through clinic hoops, journaled till your hand is sore from writing, excercised to the best of your ability...and all of this will get you to the prize in the end!

Hugs...and know we are all here to support you...

Brenda

I am celebrating the fact that I am down 51lbs today!!!  It has been a very hard struggle for me since November.  I don't know why.  It just has.  But I think that some of it has to do with winter, and now that I look back on things and since the weather has improved so has my mood, I am seeing that there might just be a pattern here.  Maybe I need to get something from my dr for SAD I dunno.  But anyway I was down 3 lbs this morning and am so close to getting out of the 310's which I have not been for a few years.

I kick myself a little as I lost 70lbs on weigh****chers a few years ago but I didn't keep it off becuause I quit.  I was also accepted to Weight WIse and let that opportunity go, so I have sometimes felt angry at myself for that.  BUT I am also a very intelligent person with a good education who KNOWS that she is where she is and has made many great choices in her life.  I love me and I want to change my outside to match my inside.  (not to toot my own horn but I am a good person and I do love myself)  Just glad that this morning the scale has finally decided to reflect my increased efforts.

Thank you all for supporting me.  I truly appreciate it and I am so greatful that you all have gone through or are going through what I am so that we can gain knowledge and insight from each other:)

Have a great day!  I know I will!

OH..and quit kicking yourself...you will get bruises....not flattering at all

You are doing great....much better than I did at the clinic...I barely lost the 10% they wanted me to...


Brenda

Relene,   I have to say that I looked at your picture and I think you are a beautiful lady.  Albeit in the picture you dont look like you were real happy about having it taken.  My God, I think when you get to your goal, you may have to watch out for all the men that will be trying to be with you.  You may find yourself with a whole new set of problems.  Hope these are funner to deal with though.  

I share your frustration as I too have stalled no matter what I do.  Lets just dig our heels in and continue to try for the heck of it.

Take care
Straw Walker

Lol!  Thanks Starwalker!  Yes I am digging my heels and and I am not letting a stupid number on a scale dictate to me how I feel.  I am letting my body do the talking.  My 1 mile walk is gettting easier and I am looking froward to it each day.  That in and of itself is success!!!  I just wish that the outside matched the inside.  But that will come!  So keep trying...I know I am !