I'm Struggling

I had my RNY about 11 weeks ago.  Everyone tells me how fabulous I'm looking (I've lost 50 lbs) and comments on how good I must be doing.... but no one sees me crying because I've eaten something wrong and have chest pain or the huge scar on my stomach.  I never thought I'd struggle emotionally like this!  I knew what was coming-- I am an RN who works in an OR.  I find myself more self concious and obsessive about my weight than I was before.  Anyone have similar experiences?

I haven't had my surgery yet, so I can't relate on the same level, but I wanted to tell you that you are not alone.  Try to remember that this is a lifetime change and just like anything in life, you have to take it one moment at a time.   I may not know you, but I'm confident that you are a wonderful person so please don't beat yourself up for the slip ups, its just a learning experience that will show you the way!  ((hugs))

I am so sorry that you are haring a hard time. Change is hard, it is going to take a while to get your groove on and get use to the new life and eating.  I am guessing you thought it might be a little easier. I think that your experienced is common to be more concerned over weight for a while. Just remember...it has been a short time to make a major life change. You will turn a corner and life will get better. Give yourself 6months to a year. And in the mean time you might want to also post in the ryn area, try a counsellor, and check in with a nutritionist. You are okay...and what you are experiencing is normal. In terms of relating to your experience to your job...any major event or trauma takes months and months to feel normal again...just take it in stride...

Ps it will take some time to reach your goal of 'feeling good in your skin"
Bonita

Thanks for the encouragement... some days are better than others.  Today I'm having a pretty good day.  

Hey--glad to here the day is better...hope you have turned a corner. We all have are days :)
keep us posted how you are doing

WOW are you ever doing great!!! Please don't be so hard on yourself. It's hard for me to 'take" care of myself...I'm trying to learn

ellen

I was scanning the forum, had never signed up, but your note prompted me to.  I had LAP Band done in 2001, am now looking at revisional surgery as had to have it removed Nov 2008 as it had slipped.  I can relate to your emotional states on many levels.  I too am an R.N., I have been through the wheel on anticipation, success (had maintained a 140 lb weight loss) and now failure as since having it removed I have gained almost half of it back, yes thats right, in 6 months almost 70 lbs. I think that there is much more of a "head" adjustment associated with all this than we expect.  This lastest stage of this journey has definitely been the hardest for me and my family.  I am not sure what I can say to help you out, but allow yourself some time to adjust to your altered body image.  Role play with yourself what you would say to a patient who has had major body altering surgery, perhaps an amputation.  You would use all the therapeutic tools you were taught in nursing, how it takes time to adjust, focus on the positives, enlist others for support, etc.  Now say them to yourself whenever you hear that internal voice bringing you down. I know that in time you will start to see the rewards of the weight loss, more energy, improvements to your health, the list is actually endless and then you will start to accept the scaring and compliments.  Know that there are others here that will help you along the way:)