does anyone else feel like they never had WLS?

don't get me wrong, i'm EXTREMELY greatfull for the weight i lost and would have RNY over agin in a second. Also, my BMI is still in the normal range.
the problem (or maybe it's not a problem) is that i can (a want to) eat A LOT (like or more than a non-op). i'm hungry all the time....

I can eat HUGE salads... really huge.

I can eat 4 oz of meat and 2 oz of cheese in a sitting.

I can eat two eggs and 3 oz of sausage in a sitting. 

I can eat 1.5 cup of soup or 1 cup and and decent size salad.

I basically can eat like a nonop eats or should eat.  Is that right? It seems a bit much to me. 

I deal a lot with head hunger.. a lot.  I think about food 24/7 and I hate that, but I probably always will... I have a disease.  We have a disease and surgery doesn't correct the portion of the brain that causes us to have issues with eating and controlled eating for fuel purposes only.

Goes to show this surgery isn't magical or the "cure".  The magic is within ourselves... and only WE can do this, its hard, it will continue to be hard and yes we were given the second chance now we have to fight for that just like the rest of the world to maintain that second chance.

I guess you can say its life, and we can look at it different ways... being jipped or being given a gift.  Some days I feel jipped, no lie.  Most days I try to remain positive and do what I can to stay positive and focused and some days its very hard to do that when I am down emotionally.

I struggle right along with you Natalie, no lies here.  I won't even post my current weight.  After the ordeal with giving up the coordinator job, I have dove into some bad patterns with eating and not caring... it can't continue or I will contue to watch the scale go up. 

Hang in there, PM me if you need to, I am doing my best to just get back on track by following the postop rules.  Some days I am successful, many I am not but I won't give up the fight.  I try really hard and that is what really matters, I will not give up without a fight.  Either should you.

Love you!

Mel... Sounds like you are "blue" since the decision, but that will pass because you made the right choice.    It may not feel like you did NOW, but over time you would have regretted it... mainly because too much was being asked of one person to start-up the program.  What were they thinking?  You would have needed much more support staff!

As for not posting your current weight, I "assumed" that it was Higher... closing-in on 150 #, which maybe is unfair to "assume".... Old line... it makes an "ass" out of U and Me...
But really not posting only seems to delay the "recovery" period that we face as Food Addicts.

You assumption is right on.  How well my surgery sisters know me... it is my panic weight.  I hate 150#.  It just isn't the number I like to see ever nor do my clothes feel good.  I have eaten a ton of salt and carbs lately though so I cannot even get my what used to my my loose weddng ring off my finger right now.  A lot of water weight.  So I am going back to protien protein protein and nonstarchy veggies and lots of water...

I am a little down about not being able to take that job.  I know it would be a perfect job for me and my "calling" but it wasn't set up for me to succeed in it and I know that.  I am totally ok with the decision just upset that it couldn't have been different.  In no way do I want to try to handle a job of that magnitutde right now. 

You are right... there ya have it.  150 lbs ya all... 150.  UGH!  I am getting back down to 140 no worries there.  I don't want to start the preholidays this way, it just can't happen.

Thanks for listening Ro.  Big hugs!

Let's do the count-down together, Girlfriend!  Kick that darn # a bit lower everyday... U can do IT!
  Ro.... loves U!

Thanks Ro! :)  I had a good day today.  My muscles are so sore from going back to weigh lifting but that usually only lasts a week... I am back to that and running again.  I got in two tubs of my favorite protein powder (arctic frappacino) that I use in my coffee everyday.. I can do it. 

   2 Cheers... sore muscles and protein commitment!  Of course, You can do it! 

Melissa,
I so know how you are feeling. I stayed away for a while and did not post then finally did and Ro said what I needed/wanted to hear from someone other then me:)
So far this week has been pretty good and I am taking it day by day.
HUGS!!!!

Thanks for understanding Diana.  I know I sounded down in that post and I am a little b/c of the situation I was in.  I am much better off this week but I have had to come to terms with me not being able to take on that job b/c it was set up for me to fail and I just couldn't go there right now in my life with what I want to start (kids etc.)   I won't stay away.. I am here.  I am 150 lbs today and it won't stay that way.  Thanks for making me keep it real.  I am not proud of that number but I can't hide it either.  You are so right.  I am SO glad you are doing better this week. KEEP IT UP!  I am very very very proud of you Diana!!! Big pat on the back!  Thanks for keeping it real and inspiring me and everyone else on the board! *hugs*

   for such a good week!!!