Beck Discussion - Week 2/Day 8

Week 2: Get set: Prepare to Diet She says after this week, we will be well equipped to START our diets! ;) That we are more ready this time then ever b/c we know what we must do now to be successful this time! What have you learned? She wants u to ponder about this for a minute. For me its eating sitting down and being more mindful of every bite. Having a plan is the only way it works for many she says and for me that is so true. So I am learning to plan all over again. I am learning to give myself credit where credit is due instead of tearing myself down and being negative. She says it is crucial to review the reasons we listed initially WHY we wanted to lose the weight in the first place.. do this at this time. So we have only accomplished week 1.. i know crazy. I need to get better at staying on top of Beck considering we are only to do a couple days a week. At the end of week two she says we will have more time and energy for dieting. We will be able to motivate ourselves to exercise and understand the importance of setting a short-term weight loss goal. Also to differentiate between true hunger and cravings. Sounds good to me.. So on to Day 8: Create Time and Energy We have to plan.. plan for cooking, plan for shopping, plan for list making before we go shopping, etc. We have to eat slowly, exercise and read our ARC's.. it takes work. it won't be easy but the more we do it the better at it will be and the more natural it will become. Talk it over with your diet coach if you must. Think about recipes, foods you like and what you will need in order to prepare them. This is important. If the food isn't readily available when you need it, you might opt for something that isn't so good for you instead. *Plan your meals *Shop for the food you will need. *Prepare your meals. *Sit down and eat your meals slowly. *Exercise *Complete and check of the tasks on your daily to-do lists. She gives the example of Ben. Mid 20's, skipped breakfast, snacked a lot instead of a healthy size lunch, fast food for dinner. He made changes, got up earlier, prepared his meals, cut down on computer time so he could plan accordingly, snacked after exercise so he would not be starving after the game. Eventually he didn't need to think about his routine, it just became automatic. I know when I was in the first year after surgery.. my plan was automatic.. that is what I am hoping to get back to. I have developed a "contract" way of eating. I print out my menu for the week and I basically eat the same things. I can change the flavor of the yogurt but I always have yogurt for a snack and I can have different meat and veggies for dinner but its always meat and veggies. It makes it simpler and makes shopping easier. I follow it best this way too. Then she discusses Lauri, I will let you read about her. How to find more time. You may need to problem solve if your life is already hectic and you can't imagine adding another thing (we have all been there!) You need to figure out ow you can delegate, cut back, or eliminate certain activities so u can have room for more healthy planning and thus meal consumptions being better for u. Write down how you spend your time currently. On page 100 and 101 they show an example of someone's schedule. If you can delegate some activities to family like household chores, then do it. Make a priority chart if you must. Divide your activities into three categories: essential, highly desirable and desirable. Discuss these with your diet coach if you must. You will probably find that many of the things u thought were once essential really aren't that essential at all. She shows an example of Lisa's priority chart on page 103 and on 104 there is a place for you to do your own priority chart. On page 105, she asks "what are you thinking?" She talks about us setting unreasonable rules for ourselves and worrying we will burden others. She wants us to let this thinking go. It's "stinking thinking" as I like to call it. Then she discusses sabotaging thoughts. Please review those. She says "Once I accept the fact that dieting takes time and energy and I change my schedule accordingly, dieting will be easier." Really, we know these things we just have to make them happen.. Dr. Beck is good at reminding us of this. Be sure u do your to-do list and included in that is reading your ARC's, don't forget about those! Next time is day 9, selecting an exercise plan.. see you monday hopefully for this one.

I've learned a few new behaviors, but I wish that Beck had written more about "Thin" people and how their thinking keeps them on track by now. Perhaps the info will be included over the following days. Her client examples focus on people who are learning; not people who have already made diet success or had personal strategies that promoted healthy weights and lifestyles. I do give myself credit for getting things completed daily; rather than focusing on what I did not accomplish, whi*****ludes healthy eating. My above comment about newbie dieters vs. the Thin Thinker was prompted by the examples and chart listed in the section...Create Time and Energy. Really, what Thin Thinker would spend time writing out ...eat breakfast... LOL If you want more time, demand it from yourself and others. Hey... Help with the laundry, Honey, because you don't have anymore clean underwear! Your Turn, Dear! Bulk shopping and freezing in quart size bags for meats saves money and time. Simple meals are basically all that most family members appreciate; they have no idea how much effort you've put into the meal that they've just inhaled. Slow cookers are great for many meals. Honestly, this section seems more about how to free yourself from the "cooking chores" that taken-on by the primary cook as their Duty. I think that you should get what you need done... like the walk... and if dinner isn't ready, let the family member help prep or reheat... or eat cereal! On a positive note, Ben's time management of cooking while watching TV makes sense, as does making better use of morning hours. I used to "enjoy" cooking a lot more when I was totally addicted to food, focusing on all aspects... planning... Now, it seems that I "have" to cook for others. I eat so little of the food that I seems that perhaps those who are eating most of it should put in effort. It's hard to be surrounded by food OR have your time wasted cooking mainly for others, when you need to be removed from the lure of food! I like the idea of the priority chart, as I would use it to delegate chores to other family members; pure negotiations. You want to eat... I'll cook, but you're folding clothes before you have dinner! "What are you thinking?" No wonder many people become MO, if they put tons of chores and tasks on their "must do list" to be a valued family member! I bet that the "Think Thinker", whom Beck should talk about... went for the manicure! So don't overload your schedule; don't be a martyr... go have some fun, while eating less and exercising more. Put yourself first! Thin People put themselves first! They are not selfish; they are practical and set reasonable limits on their time.

Ro, I think I need to bookmark this post...you have touched on so many good things!!! I wish I could get family participation like you mention. Prolli what my problem is that I just don't want to expend the energy to light the fire under others to get them to do what they need to do. Pretty much we are already operating on some of the systems you mention. When DH runs out of whites, he just asks me if I've washed any lately (and the usual answer is no) and then he does it. Getting the clean basket of clothes out of the laundry room is another thing. He and Sam are perfectly fine with going downstairs to grab some clean clothes rather than actually putting said clean clothes away in their own rooms. I don't get it. Cooking, is another story. The guys will eat absolutely terrible if I don't cook for them. And since I'm too tired most days to cook multiple meals they often fend for themselves and end up eating way too many carbs, fats and calories. But how often can you ask one woman to prepare three different meals at one mealtime??? Like you, I used to enjoy cooking but now it just is another chore. I usually get a big cooking urge and use it to prep my own foods and then have them frozen or at least just portioned out and chilled. Can't do that for the guys, they don't like the stuff I choose to cook these days. And with me dumping less and less I don't dare have a lot of 'their' foods on hand because it is waay too easy for me to nip in and graze a bite here and there. It isn't safe, so I can't do it. Well, that was truley rambly and prob. didn't make a bit of sense. haha Too hot here today! I got outside and took down a 40+ year old rhododendron to get a new one planted in 90 degree heat. While I think it is lovely to be warm at last this is too hot!

I've learned a few new behaviors. My favorite is to give myself credit for getting things completed daily; rather than focusing on what I did not accomplish, whi*****ludes healthy eating. I wish that Beck had written more about "Thin" people and how their thinking keeps them on track by now. Perhaps the info will be included over the following days. Her client examples focus on people who are learning; not people who have already made diet success or had personal strategies that promoted healthy weights and lifestyles. My above comment about newbie dieters vs. the Thin Thinker was prompted by the examples and chart listed in the section...Create Time and Energy. Really, what Thin Thinker would spend time writing out ...eat breakfast... LOL If you want more time, demand it from yourself and others. Hey... Help with the laundry, Honey, because you don't have anymore clean underwear! Your Turn, Dear! On a positive note, Ben's time management of cooking while watching TV makes sense, as does making better use of morning hours. Bulk shopping and freezing in quart size bags for meats saves money and time. Simple meals are basically all that most family members appreciate; they have no idea how much effort you've put into the meal that they've just inh

Must have on the enter button in some odd way.... Hmmmm.... Time for bed

Creating time and energy really speaks to me these days. I have really been feeling that I'm not putting in the time and the energy that I did last summer. May be just like Ro said in chat, that we aren't having the same rewards feelings that we had when more weight was coming off and there isn't that excitement. Whatever it is, I think my life was probably just as crazy last summer as it is now (just different situations) and yet I still managed time to be on the bb's every day AND log my foods in sparkpeople AND exercise. So...I just need to reset myself as a higher priority and get back to it! I have placed my ARC's in a few more places so even if I don't re-read the whole thing I see it and that visual reminder is good. I like your contract way of eating, that puts it in an easy category for a life-skill. Easy is good and do-able. I make sure to keep legal foods on hand for myself and have found that I MUST have some legal chocolate on hand or else I try to stuff every other thing in my face to compensate for it. It means I have to do a lot of mental bargaining and letting go of stinkin' thinkin' for 'needing' that chocolate but at least I am owning it and dealing with it. So far, I have managed to get 2# off and that feels good. Being at 138 is still 2# over my panic weight of 136 but it is so much better than 141.5! I have been craving cheesecake for some odd reason lately so I took the time to make one today and will have my wonderful, legal piece and then freeze the rest after the rest of the family get their fill. It'll be over and done. We are having kebabs for dinner and I'm looking forward to the lovely grilled taste of my veggies. DH and DS will be having steak with theirs but I'll be having baby portobellos. Yumm!!! Hope the temps have dropped a bit, I want to sit outside on the patio swing and re-read this section of the book. Thank you for getting this posted, Mel! Molly

Hello and I too need to reread this section because I really need to plan my meals and shopping. I also buy way too much and then not planning exacting what I am going to eat causes me to not eat right and choose something that is not so good but fast and easy. I need to become more responsible and get with the program. Because it is summer seems I have been very lax . I will reread this section and begin to prepare for the next phase . Has anyone heard of the book , Losing the last 30 pounds? Someone recommended it to me too Anyway have a great week i am hoping to break my stand still this week. i did not gain any on vaction but have not lost either, so it goes Kelly

Just a few thoughts... *Plan your meals Plan your meals, but plan to keep the serving smaller than the non-WLS person. Have you considered eating 1/2 NF yogurt to see if you'd be "satisfied"? I purchased the 4 oz Ball Jars with white twist-on lids, after my surgery to store what I couldn't finish in a meal. I still use them from time to time. I can certainly eat 15 pretzel sticks now, but many times I eat only 5 so that I can enjoy other foods. Plan smaller meals and let me know how much weight you lose! *Shop for the food you will need. Shop for the food you will need; not the food that you crave. If you have left-overs, freeze them in quart-size bags or wrapped individually (cut-up rotisserie chicken; 1 serving lasagna... meatloaf...hamburgers) and seal that inside the quart-size bags. Later figure-out what ingredients you will need to "jazz-up" the frozen meat / food. See how many times you can "put back" not-so-great food choices... and walk away! Shop for the food you will need to stay healthy! If you are deficient in Vit A, purchase some foods that are "rich" in Vit A.... Shop for the food you will need to not binge! Don't worry about the others in your family pouting if you did not buy them "chips". Let them buy and eat whatever they want on their own dime and time. Ask yourself... Who are the "chips" really for??? *Prepare your meals. Prepare your meals to be in-line with what others eat, but smaller / healthier version. Ultimately, the goal of WLS is to eat typical foods within your goal range. How long can you avoid eating basic foods without feeling deprived or without developing food aversions / disorders? Did you have your surgery so that you could eat like a NASA Astronaut? Eating "different" foods signals that you may not be dealing with your food issues. At 18-months out, it's time to deal with your food issues... just "prepare yourself" that you'll be OK with the foods that you'll prepare to make this giant leap! *Sit down and eat your meals slowly. Sit down and eat your meals slowly does not mean "eat in the car" anymore! LOL Just enjoy your meal at the table and make your goal to eat a bit less than you are eating now... Let me know how much weight you loose! *Exercise Exercise is great.. It keeps depression away and bone density stable. Your body will "crave" the level of exercise that you "set" for it. It will lose weight once that level is reached. That said, if you set the level too high, you are setting yourself up for disappointment. You don't need to over-do exercise to get its benefits! Evaluate what you current level... is it something that you can do "forever"? ... is it something that you do "sometimes" and then "drop-out"? These are signs that the level is not realistic for you. Walking 30 minutes might just be the ticket to health! *Complete and check of the tasks on your daily to-do lists. ...and see if you can recite your ARCs without "looking" by now! Can you???? Just a few thoughts... Now, I'd love to know what you think about them! Ro