Beck Diet Solution - Chapter 2 - What Really Makes You Eat?

Ready for Chapter 2 gang? Here it goes.. Dr. Beck says we always have a thought before we eat.. we don't just eat subconsiously.. we have to make a decision to make this happen. We try to justify by saying "Just this once won't hurt, it won't matter". These are what she calls "sabotaging thoughts". These are thoughts that encourage us to eat. These are statements that are usually put together like this.... "I know I shouldn't eat this, but.." There is usually a "but" in there somewhere. Or you justify the action to yourself by saying its a "celebration", I can eat it! How many of you are guilty of this! MY HAND IS SO HIGH IN THE AIR RIGHT NOW! If my pit stunk.. let's just say you'd know it! lol.. She states "if you can identify the *triggers* that evoke sabotaging thoughts and lead you to eat in unhelpful ways, you can minimize your exposure to them or change your response to them." She wants you to start strengthening your resistance muscle rather than your give-in muscle. The more you strengthen your resistance muscle the better you will be able to resist in the future and feel good about it. Eating always begins with a trigger she says. There are many triggers: *Environmental - the seeing or smelling of food. *Biological - hunger, thirst, cravings. *Mental - thinking about food, reading a description about food, recalling something you enjoyed eating or a situation which you didn't eat and felt deprived or imagining eating food in the future. *Emotional - unpleasant feelings, such as anger, sadness, anxiety, frustration, or boredom. You eat to comfort or distract yourself. Can also be pleasant feelings. *Social - People who urge you to eat or situations in which you want to be able to eat like everyone else. She states this book will help us deal with the above mentioned/listed triggers. She defines hunger, thirst, desire and cravings on page 30. Be sure to look over these definitions and understand them truly. Make sure you are eating for the right reasons she says. I think the goal for this chapter should be to figure out our PERSONAL triggers from the above mentioned list. You don't need to figure out how u are gonna deal with them today.. the chapters that proceed will help us with that. My personal triggers are 100% without a doubt emotional and social I would say. The others I think affect me just not as much as the two I mentioned. I think we all suffer from this if we were obese.. she agrees with that also. So please share with us what triggers affect *YOU*. She later says the decision to eat can reduce tension so can choosing NOT to eat can reduce tension. I know this. I have been there.. it feels good to turn something unhealthy down for myself. Remember she says eating is not automatic. You can be in control. Eating/food addiction is different than other addictions because we do need food to live unlike alcohol, cigarettes etc.. so each and every time we sit down at the table (remember she wants u to sit to eat.. ) that you have to make a choice.. and we hope its a good one! When you encounter a trigger, your thoughts determine whether you act in a productive way that strengthens your resistance muscle or in an unproductive way that strengthens your giving-in muscle. She is going to teach us to respond to sabotaging thoughts throughout this book. It is a skill she says we can use through our lifetime to keep our excess weight off permanently and I believe we can use it other life situations as well.. this is cognitive/behavioral therapy guys.... and we can master this! Thoughts? Reactions?

As it is so "early" in the book, I'll add that the food / food shopping could be applied to this chapter easily. Eating is not automatic; neither is WHAT we chose to eat. We decide, even plan, what is going to tempt and sabotage us long before we sit down to eat. From there the sabotaging thoughts are rationals to eating poor choices. Sure hope that Beck includes a few prompts, such as.... THE (one of mine!) Is it Thirst, Hunger, or Exercise that my body really needs? If my water intake is low, that is my first course of action. It usually calms the urge to eat. Now...exercise? Guilty there... still a couch potato. Just a pet peeve here: So many people have mentioned that they were sexually abused early in life. Later the pound layered-on almost like a protective shield. I'd list that as an "emotional" trigger. Diet...lose weight...become vunerable... or Diet..but I'll lose weight...and I'll be vunerable again = "I can't stick to my diet" = Safer Fat! BTW, the guilt felt after a binge is just NOT worth it. When I turn down foods that I should not be eating, there is no guilt... but JOY! I was offered a piece of cake the day after a birthday party by DH! Yes, I bit off his head! If I was strong enough not to eat "fresh" cake at the party, why would I then decide to eat it "day old"? What I said was, "Why are YOU sabotaging me?" We didn't talk about it again until the next day. Then I said, "I know that you were trying to be thoughtful by offering the cake, but just don't. Remember I had surgery to lose weight. I don't need help putting it back on. Thank you." THAT SAID... Had it been my planned choice to eat the cake at the celebration, I would have eaten it. I've had several non-icing laden cakes and treats at parties without continuing the PATTERN for meals or days. I think that if a particular day truly is a celebration... enjoy it! Eat reasonably and have 1-2 treats... thin people do this... then it's back into their "default" healthy eating mode, which they work-on making "automatic" by staying goal oriented. JUS****CH OUT FOR SABOTAGE!

Chapter 2: "I think the goal for this chapter should be to figure out our PERSONAL triggers from the above mentioned list. You don't need to figure out how u are gonna deal with them today.. the chapters that proceed will help us with that." ~ Melissa *Environmental: The aroma of food is a big trigger for me. People who "stuff their faces" remind me of the "foaming / sliming" problems of early post-op. *Biological: I used to mini-binge pre-op; about a dozen different small portions of foods. Still haven't "trusted" myself with the Vitamuffins... there must be some fear going on about them. *Mental: The recipes that are posted here sound so good, but I have not felt that it was a good idea for me to try them yet. Aroma? Binge? Right now, it's Food Porn to me. *Emotional: I eat less when I am upset, etc. now. Anxiety is another story. Since I've lost more than expected, I've worried about my health so I am going for more testing. *Social: It would be nice if some people understood "no" the first time... I usually hear, "Are you sure?" Coming to our Dec MB has been a big distraction from frustration, but lately the board has been almost "still". On top of that, coming here tends to become addictive. I don't see things as "good" or "bad", but it would be nice to keep the MB alive!

Hello and here I am I have been reading the book and am at chapter two will kick it up abit this next week. This month will be totally crazy for me, Any teachers out there, we just know that May is the craziest teaching month there is!!!! Okay enough whining you say ,LOL. Chapter two is totally hitting home for me. I think most of the time I , (hey i take that back most all the time )I sabotage myself and make all the nessacery excuses for it too. I will say just today it will be okay and then I find that one day bleeds into the next and then it is hard to get back on track. Most of the tiggers have effected me. I am hoping reading this book further will help me to find other ways to control my food addiction. I find now I can eat everything and anything and that scares me. The dumping tool seems to be gone althougth when I did the pouch test this last week lost 5 pound hooray! when Friday came I did cheat a bit and got sick so maybe tool is still there . So I now need to change the mind set!! Like the Dr says we can get control!! Makes me want to read more to find the answer!!!! I will read the next few chapters, good reading everyone Kelly

Really Good Points Here... Excuses...Sabotage...Stress...Food Triggers...Food Addiction! One Day Bleeds into the Next...Hard to Get Back on Track! Seems like putting limits on the amount of food and a time limit on eating is what you are seeking here. I can relate to everything that you mentioned! Ro

Until reading chapter 2, I never really thought about how the thought does have to come first. I think I tended to try to block those thoughts out after I'd made the conscious decision to act on them. I can identify with so many of the negative talk in just the first two chapters! And I can now clearly see the stress I was causing myself when I'd binge & purge. In reading the triggers, I see how differently they come into play more than I'd ever thought of before. I spent too much time concentrating on food or what my next "meal" would be to spend any time seriously thinking of the "why" part of what I was doing. My major triggers were biological (cravings for salty, crunchy foods a couple times a month and completely binging on them all day long - now I feel anxiety whenever I see the bags of my favorite chips in the chip aisle of the store); mental (I spent a LOT of time imagining future food - I'd wake up in the middle of the night and wonder what I would eat the next day); social (I couldn't say no to anything, even now when I'm in social situations or parties at a friends house, I have to consciously tell myself I'm not hungry or I feel like I could just eat and eat and not stop until I'm sick - hunger has nothing to do with it!). Finally my biggest trigger is emotional. Any emotion was a good enough reason for me to eat. If I felt bad, I thought it would make me feel better (strange, never sank in that this never worked). If I felt good, celebrate by eating my fav foods until I made myself sick (again, this wasn't really working for me, but that didn't stop me). And I have used food as a way to keep myself "safe" from being noticed. People tend to ignore the obese and I found when I gained weight, people stopped noticing me and I felt "comfortable" that way. The most powerful sentence in this chapter for me was on page 32 - "If you've never had the experience of feeling proud of yourself for not eating, you're in for a wonderful surprise." Proud of myself for not eating??? I have never, ever thought that. I must have read this one sentence ten times and went back to it numerous times while reading chapter 3. It literally amazed me to even read that statement, let alone ever try to think it. I could (and still can) hear my negative thoughts when I'd pass on food - "well it's about time you did something right" was my usual thought. I never once considered being proud of myself for it. I am still blown away by that sentence. I highlighted it, flagged the page, typed it on a separate sheet of paper and blew it up larger and I keep finding myself looking at it. What a concept! She's so right - eating is not automatic, you can (and I will) learn to take control, I will learn and use the techniques to avoid or minimize those triggers. And when I do avoid or minimize them - I will be proud of myself for doing so!! I realized I haven't been told myself I'm proud of me for using my tool to lose so much weight and make my life healthier, free of all my meds, off my cpap and everything else that goes with all the hard work I've been doing for the past six months. Everyone else I know tells me how proud they are of me - it's time I realized that I, too, can be proud of myself and start acting like the success-in-progress that I am. BTW Ro & Melissa- Thanks for letting me join you guys even though I'm not as far along as you are. I can't believe how empowering knowing you're there for me and starting this book has been for me. I felt like I was out of control a few days ago and now I feel like I'm seeing a light for the first time! You're amazing! THANK YOU!!!!

You are more than welcome and *SO* glad you are here.. I can relate to you on so many levels with the eating disorders. I am not a purger but I do have times where i graze nonstop and can binge. I hate that I do it but I do believe I have to get to the ROOT of my problems and this book and therapy will help me get there. I have been able to pass up food but only when I wasn't craving from carbohydrates. If I eat mainly protein then I don't crave food, period. Soon as I eat carbs (other than veggies and maybe some beans) I am screwed - the cycle begins. I am not sure how I will ever have a truly balanced diet. I think I have screwed up my body as I have always eaten high protein diets since I was 12 (on and off) so now its like so insulin resistent and carb hating.. ugh. But getting back to the passing up of food.. I can do it when I have no cravings and it does feel good. The first 11 months postop I got MUCH JOY saying no to foods.. I loved the empowerment. I am wanting that back and times I do get there.. but one slip into carb city from an emotional trigger.. and ugh, I start all over again. I wish I had the answer for myself and for you how to stop the cycle. I am hoping this book and our discussions together will help us sort our feelings. I have read it twice before but I always learn more every time I go back through it. Thanks for joining us.. so glad you are here. *hugs* ~Melissa

I can relate to the carb monster. That is my trigger as well...I have eliminated sugar completely from my life- i dont even try- but other carbs go down fine and then it is all down hill from there. I havent read chapter 2 yet- but from what i am reading here- i may do that tonight...I have to do something.....i feel like l have been going down that slippery slope way too often and i want that first 11 months BACK too....

I hear you on the blasted carb monster.. lets zap him!

Glad that U are with US! I never purged...and always hated throwing-up... so when the early WLS foaming and sliming hit me, I was shocked into eating smaller portions. Cruchy foods are my passion... then anything savory; not sweet. Now I eat Snyder's pumperknickle, oat, and honey wheat pretzels for a healthier "fix". Your comment about "keeping safe and not being noticed" hits home with me too. It might have been more to do with being noticed by men for me initially. Honestly, now that I am so small I feel vunerable, as if I couldn't hold my own in a "struggle". Where as, when I was BIG, I could kick some A$$, if I needed to... no one would want to try to take advantage of me then. Well, I've worked out a lot of my earlier abuse issues, but obviously not all of them. ((((HuggingMyself)))) At some point, I resented when people would ignore me. Hey, I was too big to be invisible! A few weeks ago, I met a group from my town and they couldn't remember me. Well, I did lose a lot of weight so I showed them my ID. Yes, they did recall me. Hmmm.... Later one woman asked about my RNY, but said that she was really "OK" with her obesity and that she was always "happy... fat or not". Based on that info, I would be considered an "angry" obese person. I told her that it annoyed me a bit now that people were so accepting... "like hello, they don't give out personalities when you have your WLS! "I" was always here... inside a fat suit." Don't think I should have said this now... might have seemed too angry for a first meeting. I love the "proud of myself" concept too!!! XOXOXO