HELP!!!!!!!

It's been awhile since I've posted to the boards but I do read them once in awhile. I had surgery Dec. 18, 2006 and I've lost around 130 lbs. I am amazed at what I've done. I am really getting scared though. I have put on about 10 lbs. or more since I have been eating non stop. I can't get enough. I am so scared that I am going to put on more. I just bought a treadmill and weight bench Sunday. So I've been walking some. I have always exercised sporadically so now that we have a bigger house I finally have room for the treadmill I've always wanted. I do stay active with my kids but I can't keep the food out of my mouth! I am thinking about going back to talk with my pychologist that I had to talk to when I was having the surgery. I am almost eating worse now than I did before surgery. I just can't get enough of the bad foods. I still eat good foods at mealtime. And at meals I don't drink and eat the protein first. It is just all the sugary foods around me especially at school. I am a preschool teacher and it seems like we are always surrounded by food. We have cupcakes for birthdays and cookies and stuff for snack. And the teacher's lounge, ugh! I was doing so good not to touch this stuff but now I feel addicted to it and just can't get enough. Oh until I dump. Then I feel so sick for about 20 minutes and it's on to the next thing. I am so mad at myself!!!! Ugh! Anyway if there are any words of encouragement that would be great. I just feel I am hitting rock bottom with the crazy food issues I have. Please help! Kristina

I am going through the exact same thing and I feel exactly how you feel - so out of control. I am going to see my nutritionist with 2 weeks documentation of everything that goes in my mouth (Sparkpeople.com is a good place to put this together - they even put it in a report for you - for free!!). I am hoping they can tell me why I can't stop eating. Also, I have noticed that when I am near, on, or just after my period I am the hungriest. As to therapy - I am thinking about it as well. I need to deal with the issues I have with food. And the anxiety I feel sometimes. It's hard to find the time and go with work though - and honestly, I am a little scared of facing these things. I would rather eat it away sometimes. Keep us posted - it is very helpful to me to hear from someone going through the same thing. I don't feel so alone anymore! You have friends here - lots of gooooood listeners!!! Kerdeeya

This is old, but pretty wise advise that I was given by a therapist many years ago. I had gained weight during my divorce and couldn't get control over my eating. The advice was to "Go Take a Shower!"... Why???? You're alone, away from food, and naked. Now you can check-out your current body. Do you want it to get fatter??? Hell, No! Did it work??? Yes. Do I do it now??? Sometimes Justing thinking about losing my current shape to obesity again works for me. Pregnancy High: 202 Divorce High: 250 Pre-Surgery High: 332+ I monitor my eating with SparkPeople and take weekly and monthly averages for my Nutritionist appointments. With all this I am still afraid that I will regain just as I did before so I can relate to how you are feeling... I feel it too! Ro

Hello Kristina and let me just say that you are not alone.....I too have lost about what you have or rounds about post surgery and I too have gained 10 lbs recently, still in the process of getting them back off. It has taken me many attempts to get back on track but each time I fell of the wagon I just brushed myself back off and tried again.. and I hope this time will be the last for a while. What has helped me was buddying up with someone who also is struggling from another surgery board. We check in daily with each other and keep each other motivated and call on the phone if we have to. I also went to the organic supermarket and founds some awesome new finds that are keeping me inspired (vitamuffins in deep chocolate flavor, a friend sent me some new coffee.. flavored yum.. so rich and tasty.. from 8thsincoffee.com ya gotta check it out). I think we have to stay creative and not get too complacent with food or we drift off.. find HEALTHY alternatives to get excited about. I also love PB2, a powdered peanut butter you reconstitute(i know sounds gross but its awesome) and it has 75% less fat and I put it on a whole grain tortilla with SF jelly.. I feel like a little kid getting to eat PB & J again.. we gotta keep it fun, enjoyable and the "junk" won't look so appealing after a while. Also keep exercising.. it gives off endorphines and makes you feel better all the way around. I have also been seeing a therapist and went to my PCP for anxiety medication. Started with zoloft and that was a disaster.. don't know if you saw my posts a few months back about that.. but now I am on wellbutrin and feeling great.. its an appetite suppressant too and not associated with any weight gain.. something u might want to consider.. Just know sweetie.. I am so in your shoes but have recently found the inner voice inside me to get me back on track.. it takes time.. and a good plan and really strong desire to get back there.. especially when the carb monster takes control. I had to detox several times.. protein shakes, sf jello and water for while till I no longer felt the need to munch endlessly.. might give it a try! Hugs!!! PM me anytime.. I am here.

Thanks so much, everyone. I just need some encouragment. I know I can do this. My clothes are all getting a little snug and this is the first time that I have gained since my surgery. It was strange in January I was just showing off my somewhat flat tummy to my dh and now I am starting to hang over my pants again. It is amazing how fast it can come back on but I have definitely been craving the carbs big time. And just like before surgery I keep saying oh after this holiday, after this next event, and so on I will start over and I haven't yet. I have got to get a grasp on this and take over my life again. I have walked the last three night since I got my treadmill and I am proud of myself. I need to start saying NO to those carbs. Anyway thanks so much for letting me know I'm not the only one!!! We can do this! Thanks, Kristina

Hi Kristina, It always helps me remember the journey and how I've gotten here (where I am soooo happy now). I hate to waste ANYTHING, and this particularly applies to effort expended. I hate to do something and have all my work go for naught! Just remember the pain that you've gone through and all the work and all the dedication to eating the right things in the right amounts... and then resolve that you won't just throw that on the heap of mistakes and misery that your life was before your surgery. Another important thing to do is to figure out why you have the cravings that you have. If you concentrate on it (I know it's painful) you'll figure out what the trigger or triggers are. Then you'll know how to avoid those triggers. Usually there are more than one trigger, so make sure you think it through fully. Sometimes it's frustration with family members, work, money or other things that will make you want to crawl back inside that 130 lbs of Kristina that kept you feeling safe and secure. Unless you want to be HER again, you've gotta fight and claw and scratch and bite and punch and kick the H-E-L-L out of whatever is making you stuff those feelings down your throat with all the "bad foods". If you feel like you need a lifeline to keep you from falling into those holes, let me know and I'll give you my number - you can call me when you're feeling tempted and I'll talk you down from the ledge. I'm sure there are others on this board who would be happy to do the same thing. Just let us know how we can help you... K?

Hi, Steve... God, I sure hope that you are right!!! I'm still waiting for the miracle moment that my son realizes that concept. You are "Dr. Phil of the Dec Babes" Ro

Smart and good lookin'... I am MR. TOTAL PACKAGE.

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