It's my turn to admit the issues I am having..

Hi Molly, I think you have even seen my husband post on the boards how proud he is of me and yes vice versa.. we love eachother VERY much just have some major kinks to work oursleves out of.. iron them out if you will.. we will get there. I have no doubts really. Just not seeing eye to eye on some issues right now. We are already getting some counseling through my job (a free service so why not?) and Tuesday is our next session.. I am hoping it brings some good things to think about and some issues to work through. Thanks for being there and letting me vent. I felt so alone at the time, still do in a way but its getting better.. luckily this weekend is good at work so far (knock on wood!) Hugs!

Hey, Melissa...You are such a sweet heart. Please don't let this visit get you down. Some people just can't be happy for other's successes, which is no reflection on you. My father has alienated me so many time through his comments that I actually told him, "You really can't help yourself. Can you?" He just smurked. I feel nothing from him...he is a man of very little kindness. Only if he is able to relate to a problem that could possible affect himself does he show any feeling. I have tried many different ways make a positive change. He is opposed to talking or counseling; preferring to assert that he is always correct; no matter what the situation. I have limited my contact with him, as it leaves me in a very bad way. I don't know if I have encountered jealousy, but very few people have "noticed" my weight loss. I felt invisible when I weight 332 # with others passing me in stores and such. Now I am about 174 # and hardly anyone has mentioned anything...even that I look healthy. One WOW, was a girlfriend, who called me "skinny", which made my day. All I am trying to say that acquaintances and some family members are not as supportive to many of us during and after weight loss. As for you husband, I agree with the others in your December family. A good heart to heart is the best that I can suggest. I am sooo sorry that you are going through this, but please don't feel alone. I pray that your marriage is blessed with understanding and renewed love, and happiness. Lots of Love Ro

Thanks Ro! Sorry to hear about the relationship with your dad, that has to be a hard one but good that you understand what you must do.. limit contact as hard as it is.. family makes it so much harder doesn't it? I appreciate your thoughts and love! You are so nice and appreciate all your kind thoughts.. husband and I are working on it.. We have another counseling session on Tuesday, I will keep you guys updated!

Hi Melissa just came online this weekend and glad to see you are back. Thank you so much for confiding in us, that means so much to me. I am very sorry that your grandmother acted the way she did. Family can be....well....difficult. I have a 89 yr old grandma so I relate to you. However I hope your other family members get past her comments and continue to support you. You are wonderful, thoughtful and inspiring person as well as a giving caretaker. Best of luck to you with your family. As far as you husband goes, I hope that all works out. I have been married for almost 8 years and we go through rough patches, and counciling has help out a couple of times. Let me know if you need anything ok. Big supportive hugs for you honey.....Erin

Thansk for all your kind words Erin. It means a lot. Aaron and I are working on things.. I think it will all be fine but we just need to get some things ironed out is all. We love each other very much and we both are admitting of that so its gonna be ok. Thanks for the supportive hugs, I really appreciate it! Hugs back atcha!

Melissa, I'm sorry you have to deal with this. It's really sad when people cannot be happy for your successes. My mom was one of those people and it tormented me for the longest time. It took me forever, but I finally got to the point where I ignored her negativity, and even kept my distance. Your hubby on the other hand IS someone you live with and have to deal with on a day to day basis, so yes of course this is of the utmost importance. I think it's great that you're seeking counseling, and I think you can only benefit. It helped my husband and I be able to communicate with each other so that we understood the other's position. I will be praying for you and your husband, and I really feel like you're headed in the right direction. ((((super big hugs)))) to you right now. And you were right coming here. It's no good feeling isolated, even if the people you tell can't solve your problems, we can certainly help carry the load, provide an ear, a shoulder, and hugs, even if only from the other side of a computer screen. Shawn

Hi Shawn! Yes, I think the cousenling is helping already and maybe even allowing some of the suppressed feelings/issues to surface a bit.. hard right now but best that they are coming out in the open and being worked on, that is what I am at least trying to convince myself right now. Glad to hear counseling helped you and your husband. Thanks for all the support, computer or not, I really appreciate and adore you guys so much. I am so glad we have eachother, it means the absolute world to me. *hugs* and thank you.

Melissa: Hang in the chica! This surgery is life altering for us all in one way or another, and of course, any cracks at the foundation or surface only be more apparent as the pounds shed...we are all behind you 200%, you offer it to us in return! Best, Megan

Thanks Megan! Wow look at that avatar, you are so beautiful, congrats on your success and thanks for being so supportive.

Melissa: Thanks, I think we are all looking mighty fine as a group, if I do say so myself I've enjoyed this journey, and as it slows down, am letting it all sink in, lots of changes for us all in just 8 short months, yes? M