What did ya eat today - Monday?

Hey Everyone! Hope you had a good weekend. Between being on my period and the stress I had this weekend.. I for the first time tried to "binge" after work today. Sigh... I feel so stupid writing this and this little bit of what I did really scared me.. I lost control. What is wrong with me??? But you guys have all been really honest with yourselves so I am going to be honest too. I felt like failure before bed this morning but I think between feeling tired, run down and stressed, I turned to food to console myself.. I woulda normally just went for a walk but I was so dang tired couldn't even think about it. I am gonna make sure my day is good considering what I did this morning. I have already planned the rest of it out and I am gonna do my best to stick to it so my daily totals actually are gonna be ok if I stay on track.. thanks for listening and hopefully understanding. Please kick my butt if you feel necessary.. I so deserve it B: Had an EAS cafe caramel shake while I was grocery shopping after work (always go after work on Mondays since walmart isn't in the town I live in but in the town I work in). After getting home about 2 hours later: 1 oz mixed nuts (why? sigh....), 1 light mozz cheesestick, 10 whole grain chips (my husbands.. I NEVER EAT THESE!! CRY!) with 2 tablespoons of salsa and three bites of grilled chicken. Slept for 5 hours... My plan for the rest of the day... 2 homeade protein shakes (broke in half) or 2 EAS shakes.. 4 oz chicken breast, green beans SF homeade latte with light van soy milk. if I must have more than I will do a mini bag of popcorn. Water, water, water.. protein protein protein...I feel the need to just "detox" right now. TOMORROW IS A NEW DAY!!! I have to forgive myself, let go of this guilt and move on, so hard to do but imperative.. bru**** off... bru**** off.. Thanks for listening tome while.. here will be my totals, protein will be high today but I am ok with that for today.. cals 1025, fats 42 (sigh.. damn chips), carbs 64 (even with popcorn if I have it.. happy about that total.. no popcorn puts it down to 46), protein (107.. ok for today). My emotions are so high right now...

Melissa you are so good on all the other days I don't think beating yourself up over a litle slip is the answer. Sometimes the bad days are the motivation to do better. 1. Special K Protein Plus w/almond milk International Coffee Decaf/SF Suisse Mocha (liquid, but has 30 calroies) 2. egg/ham/broccoli quiche 3. 2 oz tuna salad 2 WASA crackers sf jello 4. light string cheese 3 oz apples 5. 3 oz chicken 1/2 cup green beans 6. Starbucks non fat s/d vanilla latte Latte (meeting a friend I will not order the NSA banana cake even though it is so good) 765 calories 73 carbs 16 fats 75 protein

Hi Melissa I hope you are feeling better yes we all have those day..Today was a day from hell at work!!!!!!!!!!!! I didn't come online all weekend, just so busy with the kids and social things, but I missed you and my buds on here Bfast - protien shake vanilla snack - 1 oz string cheese lunch - 2 oz pinto beans and 4 oz turkey salad w/craisins and pecans snack-soy latte(homemade!!) with sf vanilla syrup and a rice cake and 1tsp smart balance peanut butter dinner - ckn and caluflower(will make mock mash potatoes) snack - cantlope or popcicles Hope everyone has a great week... !!!!!!! Erin

Aw, Melissa. No butt kicking from me. From the looks of it lately we must all be having some re-adjustment blues setting in at this 8-month period. Thank goodness we have each other to be accountable too, it really scares me to think how hard this would be to go through without all of you. I overslept so bad today that I didn't have time to make my shake so I just grabbed a pre-made soy latte from the fridge and added an EAS choc. to it so my day got off to a weird start. Hasn't been too bad though. Although...after work I went S H O P P I N G !!! And boy, did the bags of clothes come home with me. Hope my daughter will help me weed through them and find the ones that can stay and the ones to go back because if my dear hubbie gets wind of the grand total I'm toast. But man, it's fun buying clothes now! 1) EAS fudge protein drink mixed with 1/2 cup lite soy milk and a shot espresso 2) 140 cal granola bar 3) 1 Dannon sf nf yogurt and 1/4 cup Bear Naked granola 4) 2 turkey/cheese rollups, 1/4 cup egg beaters/diced ham (leftover frittatta) 5) 160 cal. Adkins bar (yuck, but I was hungry) 6) 2 cups watermelon, 1 cup marinated cucumbers If I get hungry later it will be more cucumbers. I have to go back and look at my numbers again, I've been substituting other protein bars when I do my sparkpeople logging and noticed that just because the calorie counts are the same I've been cheating myself by using some entries that are way higher carbs than I actually ate. Guess i need to spend time on my personalized food favorites. Molly

Hi My day was not GOOD AT ALL. Breakfast-1/2 whole wheat SMALL bagel with Peanut butter Lunch-1/2 bagel turkey and cheese sandwich and 100 calorie pack of sunchips Snack-bites of leftover birthday cake, handful BBQ chips and some grapes Dinner-bacon wrapped chicken and steak Not enough****er My mom has pancreatic cancer and only has a few weeks left and I have been going back and forth to Cinti to stay with her and this week I have not had enough water and I weigh 2 pds more then last week. I sat here today with the chips and thought what the HECK are you doing..this is not going to make you feel any better. I would have smashed them and pitched in trash but my youngest loves them so I need to realize that are for him not ME to eat. They were left over from his Bday party just like the *amn cake was. I am not using my moms health as a excuse.I am a emotional eater and need to work through this. FOOD IS NOT THE ANSWER. Tommorrow is a new day and I can not wait.

Diana, I'm so sorry you have this to deal with. You know you are doing your best for your mom and have loved and cared for her right up to the end. Of course you will have to face your food issues along with the grief too after she has gone. So many of us here are emotional eaters; I am too. We are all here to hold you up with prayers and good thoughts and hope that you will continue fighting the emotional eating as best you can. In the future, you could buy or make a smaller cake. The rule in our house is that the birthday person gets to choose the flavor of the cake (but not the size), gets the pick of pieces on his/her birthday and can have a piece of it for breakfast the next day. And then it is fair game for the rest of the family. I have taken to sneaking pieces of cake into the trash so that they think someone else has just eaten another piece until it gets down to the last piece, which also goes to the birthday person by our family tradition. I have to be sneaky but it is for their own (and my) good. With those chips, aren't they geting stale by now? If you can't use that as an excuse to throw them away then put a nice helping of them into a baggie for your son and throw away the rest of the bag. I know now is not the time for you to be worrying about developing a bunch of strategies, you have more important matters to deal with, but I thought I'd throw it out there for a future idea or two. Hugs!!!! Molly

I agree with you Molly... those chips have got to be stale. Throw em out Diana.. today I told my husband what I did with his Multi grain chips.. he remembers I had a chip fetish preop.. he told me to get out of the house if they are a temptation for me.. he made me throw them out.. he said he doesn't have to have em. What a guy.

Diana.. i had quite the day myself as you know.. its ok. You have a lot on your plate right now and this is a true test for you as you already know. We are addicts, we will always be addicts and its good that you recognize that you need to do something else to outlet your stress. For me its exercise.. I love it.. Plus I love music.. so the two together are as good as eating a bag of chips, amazingly. today I was too tired after working to run off that stress so now I know I need to find another alternative besides eating and working out to handle stress.... not sure what that is gonna be.. maybe get lost in a chapter of a book or something! Great that you know this though and we all should work on other strategies.. that is for sure. it is hard.. one day at a time my friend. I am sorry for all you are going through right now, i wish I could hug you, I hope you will consider my cyber hugs and know that I care about you very much just as the rest of this december family does as well. Please keep us posted and I am praying for you and your family right now.

My weekend was so deplorable that i could not even bring myself to write it down....i have no idea what the damage was but Monday was a new and better day ....****il after 8pm!) I had a Carbohydrate ATTACK .. I sure like the Kashi Bars...but goodness they have 20g of Carbs for 1.....sigh B: 4 Wasa 4 slices of lite swiss L: 2 boiled eggs 4oz Dannon L&F D: 3 shrimp 1 Tomato sliced with 2oz Mozzerella and basil 4oz yogurt After Dinner Grazing: Kashi Bar (20 g carb) Low carb Tortilla (18 g carb) Bites of Cantalope 976 Calories 36 Fat 74 Protein Notice I left out the Carbs (drum roll please) 87 GRAMS OF CARBS