I finally did it!!

Melissa, I applaud your strength. You had the strength and courage to go through surgery to get yourself healthy, and now you are gaining the strength and courage to get your mind healthy also. I went through a divorce in 2003 (prior to surgery), and although I was the one that asked for the divorce, just like you, it was one of the most emotional and difficult things I ever went through. When I was in my marriage, I was so unhappy, and felt I was not being a good mom, because I was frustrated and irritated all the time, and I would yell at them out of that frustration. I can honestly say, that now that my divorce is final, and I have been through WLS and lost nearly 100 pounds, I am happier than I have been in a VERY LONG time. My kids and I made a new home for ourselves and we are doing wonderfully. They see their dad 2 days a week, and that is good for them. You will make it through this difficult time. Be strong for you and your children. It will not be easy. I wish you all the best. Tracy 230/136/115

Thanks Tracy. It's nice to hear someone else who has been through this and is doing well I love your new picture. You are so pretty. Melissa

Take a deep breath, make a list of priorities, take another deep breath, talk to a professional, for emotions and finacial issues. Find out what is out there in your state for single mothers. Make sure you have medical coverage for yourself and the children. Make a list of why you need to divorce this man, you had to make a list of why you wanted or needed this surgery and that sure helped me think with focus and clarity. Remember your decisions affect more than yourself. The children need to know why and that they will still have both parents who love them for always. Be good to yourself, find ways each day to do this. Make a plan, even if it isn't concrete, but you can not approach this change without a plan or action, loose as it may be. Remember there are professionals out there who can offer guidance. Just as we all support each other at this and other sites on line for our WLS, there are so many people out there who have been in your shoes and walked in your steps. Don't let the raw emotions guide you. You have to grasp the steps you are taking not for today for all the days ahead. Good luck. Monica, never been there, but older, tasted life, had rough spots, sought help and found it.

Thank you Monica. You always have such good advice and I will definitely take it to heart. Melissa