I need a friend!

Hi everyone. Some of you may not remember me. I haven't posted in a while. I keep reading all the posts, but I never respond because I've been having a hard time dealing with things. I have gained back 20 pounds and I never even reached my goal. I've been really struggling with this. I've been depressed and feeling like a real failure. I am very happy for all of you who are doing so well. I just didn't want to be the problem one always posting on here. Well, things have just gotten worse and I really need a friend. I just need to hear something positive and you guys are always so nice. On the way out the door to work this morning, my husband told me he wants a divorce. Than he took all the credit cards. I am a stay at home Mom with 3 kids. I have no job, no money and no place to go. I don't know what I am going to do. I know I need to be strong for the kids, but I honestly don't know how much more I can take. Thans for listening. I don't really have any friends I can talk to here and I really needed to share. Melissa

Hi Melissa, I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. As you already know I'm also having a hard time with my weightloss. I can't read my yahoo e-mail here at work but I'll check it this evening when I get home. You can e-mail me when you need someone to talk to. Do you have family that can help you? Maybe you can move in with them until you find a job. I know is hard when you have kids but you have to be strong for them. Good luck to you. Hugs, Norma Cantu

Thanks Norma. I'm trying my best to keep everything as normal as possible for the kids until I know what I am going to do. How are you doing? Melissa

((((Melissa)))) I remember ya and can understand how you're feeling... I have also gained a few pounds back from my lowest point and am still MILES away from my own goal of being below 200 lbs... Unfortunately, the surgeons only fixed our tummies and our minds are still our own... I was and still am an emotional eater... I find myself snacking and eating the wrong things too... I was one of the heaviest in our December family so it's depressing for me to see others who are at their goal and I am still so far... I try not to let things get to me but I am human and it does... I am happy for all those who've had success but just wish I had a little more here too... But enough about that... I just want you to know that YOU are not alone in this... There are definitely others who are struggling with the same issues as we are... They may just not say anything on the board(s) but I bet they struggle too... Don't give up hon whatever you do... Don't let the war with weight get you down... You can do it... Never give up though!! Keep fighting!! I'm right there with you all the way and will support in any way that I can... I'm an email away if you need to talk about anything in a more private setting that on the board... Feel free to write if you'd like by hitting my e-mail link... As for the potential divorce facing you, I've been there too... I never thought I could make it on my own either but I have... I've actually thrived on my own & re-married a wonderful man... I finished college & have worked hard to get where I am now in more ways than one... Just remember that if there is a will, there is a way... You will get through this... Just be strong for the kids Melissa... They will need you to do that... I know sometimes when things are facing you it seems hopeless but you just gotta keep movin' on... I have a feeling you will be fine... Believe in yourself! You're not a failure... Besides think of it as a fresh start... A better life even... Although now it seems overwhelming I know... Anyhow, I'm here for ya to lend an ear and a shoulder if you need it... (((((HUGS)))) Chelle

Thanks Chelle. It's nice to know that I am not alone in all this. I'm sure things will work out for the better at some point. It just doesn't seem like it now. Melissa

I don't believe in goals. My surgeon told me I should be around 130lbs. OH MY GOD!! I'm 154lbs and look good Everyone tells me. If you get down to 130lbs you'll be too skinny and they are right. I wish these surgeons would not put goals on everyone. Hugs Donna

You DO look great Donna... I am amazed at your success and so happy for you... I would like to be at 190 lbs because for me that would be a good weight... I am pretty tall and have a larger frame... I had originally said 170 would be where I wanted to be but I would look like a skeleton at that weight I think... My surgeon never really set a goal for me and the last time I seen him he was very pleased with how I'd done... I have not been there since my 1 year checkup and have no plans to go back unless I have problems... My PCP is great and knows all about bypass so he's been watching my bloodwork... Last time I had my bloodwork done my A1C was absolutely normal (no more hints of diabetes), my cholesterol was like 150 and all the B levels were good so I am very pleased with all that... Just would like to see the weight moving again... I CAN DO IT!!! Chelle

Oh sweetheart, hugs and kisses After all you have been through he wants to walk away. I'm here for you. Need to talk I'm here. [email protected] My husband has been on my ass about going back to work but I'm trying to get my old job back that pays $9.00 which is NOTHING but it's better then anything. Hugs Donna

Thanks Donna. You are very sweet. I read most of your posts and it sounds like you are having a rought time too. Hope things work out for you also. Melissa

We are the stronger sex of man/woman and I mean it. Tell yourself you CAN DO IT!! Start looking for a job or sources that will train you in a job you can do. There is a lot out there for women but you have to start looking. Right now I'm trying to get my old night job back and my husband is PISSED!! Well tough!! I have to do what makes me happy and I need my OWN money. I'm hanging in there until September to so this Doctor about my hormones and hopefully I'll get my life back on track. Hugs Donna