New to the board, would like your advice.

Hi everyone! My name is Staci and I had RnY on Dec. 10, 03. I am a full time special education teacher in Louisiana and a mother of four and in graduate school. I started this journey weighing in at 253 and wore a size 22/24 in clothes. So far have lost 78 pounds and am in a size 10 in most pants and a large in shirts. I had really been discouraged until I began reading your messages. Now I see that I am not the only one discouraged. I still look in the mirror and see the fat girl and feel fat in my clothes, even though they are so much smaller than they used to be. I haven't had much of any complications and it has been pretty much smooth sailing for me. I seem to be losing everything in my legs, butt and thigh area but since I was apple shaped, I haven't lost near about what I want to in my torso/stomach area. I am so thick around my belly and my bra area that it still grosses me out to look in the mirror and see the rolls, (although there is only one now compared to about four 5 months ago- Ha!). I have been scared I haven't been eating right, I haven't been exercising much and cannot tolerate any meat except for crawfish and KFC liver (and the grease bothers me with those) so I am afraid I am not getting enough protein. My doctor has not told me the first thing to do. He never took my measurements to begin with and I forgot to so I don't know how many inches I have lost. I do take my vitamins and drink water, tea, crystal light and cranberry juice (for my bladder infections). My worry is that I eat too many carbs. I am lactose intolerant and can't tolerate milk or products except for colby jack/cheddar cheese which doesn't bother me a bit and I love but I have severe constipation. I do eat a lot of crackers, triscuits, cheez nips, etc. because they don't bother me. I try to include vegetables in almost every meal but I don't eat much so it's hard to get it all in. My real fear right now is that I am going to get really depressed. I have been on Celexa for 3 years now, so I haven't had any episodes of depression except the usual, but my best friend is another story. She just had her 1 yr anniversary date and has lost 105 pounds and looks like a million bucks. She is beautiful and so thin! but she is having some major depression, panic attacks and seems to be headed for a mental breakdown. I took her to the doctor and they put her on Celexa but it makes her very druggy feeling, nauseous and she has almost every side effect imaginable so she took herself off of it. Now she is in a down hill spiral and attempted suicide last Friday night. I just don't know what to do for her and I have a fear that that will happen to me. Can any of you relate to what is going on with her and offer any suggestions? She has her one year check up the same day I have my 6 month one so I am going to talk to Dr. Gibbs about it then but that is still about 5 weeks away. I hope to become involved and get to know all of you on this site. I am so upset that I hadn't found it sooner. I don't have a support group in my hometown, so I guess you guys can help me with that, if you are willing.

Hello Staci, Glad you found your way to the December board! It is a great place for support. I am sorry to hear that you are feeling down about things and the troubke that your friend is experiencing. No one promised us an easy journey. Being fat and that changing so quickly leaves us with distorted perceptions and a self image that doesn't always match our changing bodies. As far as your friend, my only advice is to stay involved and be there when she needs you, but she really needs to be seeing a Dr. until she stabalizes. Ups and downs are to be expected, but being suicidal is not part of the game. Going off of anti-depressants on your own is scary business too. When you already have a chemical imbalance and you add meds and take them away... well its just asking for a disaster. Encourage her to talk to her Dr about a new med. there are sooooo many and sometimes it takes time to find one that does the job wihout overkill on the side effects. As for you, you have to monitor your feelings too. We can all get out of control sometimes. Know when you feel THAT down that it's time to get help. Have a safety network... certain people you know you can turn to and be honest with when you are down who can offer support and never be afraid to go to the Dr or a hospital. Coming here is great too. It DOES help to see you are not alone and not crazy in how you feel.... and that it DOES get better!!!! Feel free to post your concerns here anytime and know there are many people who feel how you do. Shawna 360/260/190

Thanks Shawna and Tracy for your encouragement and support. I am so very happy I found this sight. I went and ate crawfish tonight(my Friday night date with my kids) and got sick. My mouth was burning so bad from the spices that I had to have some water and drank too much. I rarely ever get sick and I hate that feeling!UCK!!! Do you guys get constipated? I take two stool softeners a day but it still takes three laxatives and an enema for me to have a BM. I am miserable most of the time until I "relieve" myself. I just dont' know what else to do for it, so I will talk to my doctor about it next month. I talked to my friend, she is much better. A lot has been going on with her other than the WLS so I think it is a combination of all the things going on. I can't make her go to the doctor, but I will encourage it, never the less. What is the deal about protein shakes? Do you drink those to supplement the protein? My doctor hasn't told me what to eat/what not to eat or anything, although i'm glad I wasn't the one whose doctor berated them for a few oyster crackers. I eat cheeze nips all the time. I teach and can't take the time to fix something so I just eat a few crackers when I get hungry to last until lunch or dinner. I didn't know crackers were such a sin! WOW- Well, need to run. Talk to you guys later. Staci 253/175/140

Hello Staci, Welcome to our Decemberites board. You have done great with your weight loss. I'm sorry that you friend is having so many post WLS problems, but that does not mean that You will too! Even though you are on antidepressants, you can't compare yourself to anyone else. We are all different. I too have been on antidepressants for YEARS and have been having more problems with them lately not working as long as I take a weekly dose only. I am not sure if it is absorbsion or the extra hormones flowing through our systems now. My doctor told me not to even TRY to get off an antidepressant for at least a year after surgery or after you have stopped losing weight as the hormonal influx will not let up until then. I know that I am not ready to go off of them now (I can tell everytime it is almost time for my next dose!) Anyway, my point is, just because you friend has depressive problems does not mean that all WLS patients do and does not mean that YOU will. Everyone has had different experiences in thier lives and everyone reacts differently to losing the weight. Just take your anti depressants for now, until you feel that you are ready to go off of them and don't worry about later what MIGHT happen. That is a big might because most post ops are thrilled and happy after losing all of their weight! Take you pills for now and be HAPPY! You are doing great! Don't waste your present worrying about what might be in the future. Have a great day! Tracy

Hi there Staci, how are you? Welcome to the Dec board. Your weight loss is great, Keep up the good work. We will be your support dont worry about that . Any questions you have just ask us ok. I have lost a total of 90 lbs as of today. I started at 245 and now weighing in at 155 lbs. We must be related , I too am lactose intolerant. I am just beginning to eat meat. I had a rough 3 months and lost 65 lbs and just vomited and vomited all the time. Things are getting easier. I eat Wendys Chili , cheese, and do eat carbs to get something in. I think if I did not I would have lost too much. I also drink a protein shake everyday. As far as veggies I either drink V-8 juice or now I am eating canned string beans which are soft and digest well. I eat tuna, chicken salad egg salad but meat by itself forget it. I am now eating meat sauce or chili.Fish works well for me also.. try these things. ok. I do find that crunchy stuff is good so I have some carbs also. Just be patient and hang with us , YOU will be fine . Keep posting OK? Lorraine

Hi Lorraine, I don't know what the deal is with the meats. My principal served us fish today to honor us and the end of school and one bite made me sick feeling. I can't eat chili, sandwich meat, ground hamburger, tuna, chicken salad or anything with meat (except the Taco bell meat). I can tolerate eggs, peanuts, yogart and some cheese, so I just hope that is enough to keep me going on protein. Should I be drinking a protein shake? I never thought about those until I came to this site. I used to drink Slim Fast all the time but now I can't because of the lactose intolerance thing. I just don't want my doctor to be disappointed in my loss when I go June 29th for my six month check up. I wanted to have lost 80-85 pounds by then. I am really thinking about joining Curves or going to a gym. I'm the type that if I am by myself, I will not do it but if I have a partner or someone to push me, I will try my hardest. Thanks for the pep talk! Talk to you soon.:smile: Staci

Hi Stacie! I had my surgery just over a week before you did. We were about the same place before surgery and we are both in the size 10 bottoms and Large/Medium shirts. I still have my tummy too. I don't know how close you are to goal but I can only imagine that you are relatively close. I still have about 27 pounds to go and I am hoping it all comes from my stomach and then I'll be so happy...lol. I can tolerate meats pretty well (except hamburger--it hates me) but I can not get in enough meat to make my 60g of protein a day so... I drink one protein shake a day. I understand that you are lactose intolerant but there are some drinks out there that can be mixed w/ water or fruit juice or you can use a soy milk. Maybe you should call your surgeon about drinking a shake just to keep up your protein levels. As far as your weight loss... you are doing fantastic! Like I said I am 9 days earlier than you and I've lost 77 pounds. The thing is I exercise a good bit... but I will have to admit to sneak in the pantry and popping a few carbs in my mouth. I can't stop cold turkey...I've tried...lol! Anyway, you are doing fantastic and you should be very proud of everything you've accomplished so far...it will only get better the closer you get to goal! ~Rachel