Hello Everyone! I still have no computer but I am stealing a moment at work to check in with you. I have read a few of the recent posts and it looks like all is well with you guys. I have a confession. My computer isn't the only reason that I have been avoiding the board. I have been avoiding you because I feel like a failure. Everyone seems to be moving down, down, down most of you are at goal or very close. And me, well I am just exactly where I left you. Still hovering about 214-216 depending on the day. I confess, I have not been making good food choices. It seems that my hunger is uncontrollable since the holidays. I am hungry or at least think I am hungry, all day long. My stomach even growls constantly seemingly to support true hunger. Does anyone else have this problem? I know we are never alone so I am sure I am not the only one. So, there you have the excuses. On a good note, I have been exercising regularly. I have been to the gym no less than 3 days per week since Jan 1. I even do 2 days per week with a PT. I am in the best physical shape of my life. I can walk on the treadmill for an hour if I want and even do mini "sprints" for a minute or two. I have worked up to using the elliptical and my abs are fabulous, even if they are hidden under a huge pani. Now for the plan of action! On Monday this week I decided to start tracking my calories, protein etc on fitday and I have done well thus far. My goal is 1200 or less per day. It is so funny now that I remember struggling to be able to eat enough to make it to 800 everyday. Ha! Those days are long gone! I plan my day in advance. I have been starting each day with a protein shake, well smoothie really, every morning. This is filling and I can drink it in the car on the way to work. I have cut out the coffee in the mornings altogether. That was a bad habit that I wish I had never started. I think the caffeine keeps my hunger raging all day. I am not restricting myself to "no carbs" I am restricting myself to healthy carbs such as fruit, veggies and whole grains only, all within reason. NO FRIED FOODS! NO FAST FOOD! NO EATING IN THE CAR! These three things have been my weakness. I know it is all about the food. Ok, let me have it. Give me the foot to the rear end. Give me the truth. Keep it real. But please give me some advice and some hope. I need HELP! I can admit it and I can accept it. Hugs, Valorie

Oh yeah, that was part of the ugliness of the conversation. He thought I may leave so he kind of threatened that he should start looking for my replacement. We both were getting a little annoyed with the other, but it all worked out in the end. We agreed not to carry any resentments or bitterness. I was still so tense last night that I couldn't sleep. I'm just very happy today though! I'm glad that you are well enough to get back to work. Life is almost back to normal for you now! WTG! Wanda

your new avatar is ADORABLE! CONGRATS on your pound loss I am so sorry to hear about the loss of you sweet doggy - remember - all dogs go to heaven have fun camping - ahhhhhhh relaxing well, relaxing after you pack EVERYTHING you *may* need, and set everything up - then its RELAXING HUGS, Britt

julie, sorry to hear about your dog. I know how hard that is. Have fun camping! I bet you will enjoy it. Sounds like you need it.

You know, now that I'm feeling better, and looking back, I guess it was pretty bad. I remember back to when I was sleeping upright because of the reflux, and afraid to eat anything because it hurt to swallow. Tonight I ate out at Noodles. I had Pasta Fresca-the small bowl. It was penne pasta with tomatoes, basil, garlic, red onion and sauteed shrimp. I ate all the shrimp (about 6 of them), and over half the pasta. That was enough and it didn't give me pain. Used to be a few weeks ago when I'd eat pasta it would sit like plaster in my intestines and cause me severe pain for about 1/2 hour after I ate. So I'm doing better as time goes on. The tube really doesn't bother me. Being hooked up to it at night or not is not a bother. I am used to it. I don't sleep on my left side anymore because it hurts where the tube is, so I've adjusted to sleeping on my right side and back. I'm sleeping so much better now too, now that I can lay down. I swear, I have enough to write a book about. Wish I knew how.