HELP!!!!! Cold feet...

My surgery is scheduled for 11/30 and up until this weekend I have been very excited. Now I am getting flat out scared! I have done my research but now new things are starting to creep into my head. Like, how long does someone live after they have this surgery? Am I shortening my life even shorter then if I stayed obesed? I want to live and that is why I started this journey. I am scared to die (like everyone else I imagine). I don't want to leave my family. I am terrified of being put to sleep and possibly never waking up. I have nightmares about what it would do to my young children. The "what ifs" are driving my crazy. How do I get over this? I know second thoughts are normal, but I feel like I am in 5th and 6th thoughts. I hate it when people tell me that everything is going to be alright, because how do they know? Mistakes/complications happen all the time. I don't know what anyone can do to calm my ruffled nerves, but I thought I would share my feelings any way in hopes that by getting it all out it would help.

Hi I feel like you.I have some young children too. But I look to the future- I have diabetes, sleep apnea, and high blood pressure. The main thing is how will I be in ten years if I don't do something now. My sister has had diabetes for 20 years and she started to go blind. The best thing is to talk to other people that went through it and everything was successful. Then you will be wanting to just get it over with. I am scheduled sometime in Dec. In the meantime, I am going to talk to a nurse who is my neighbor. She is the head nurse. I will ask her if she has seen any complications from this. I have a personal friend that did the RNY last March, and she wishes she would have not waited so long. Best Wishes! RAbden

I had the same fears. I have a 13 yr old daughter and an 11 month old son, and I was so afraid I'd never see my precious babies again. I was pretty good going into surgery until it was almost time. I was prepped to go, and my husband came to be with me in the holding area, and I started crying. But here I am 2 weeks post-op, down 19 lbs, and I feel really good. I don't regret it for a moment. Just try to keep calm, encourage yourself, ask others to encourage you, and soon it *will* be over and you'll be on the losing side. I don't know what else to say to help you, but I'll be thinking of you.

Hi. I had my surgery on 11/02/05. I was terrifed of what i would do afterwards too. I can honestly say i am doing great. The first week was really tough for me. I could not eat anything because of the gas in my stomach. but now im doing great. I chew all of my food really really good. I have eaten chicken, soup, ( if i go to a restaurant i order soup) and yes that does fill me up. I will live not for my wife or kids but for ME....... I still eat pretty much what i want to but i eat a lot less. It will be ok..... really

Hi, I had my WLS in March of this year and I just want you to know that what you are thinking about and going through is totally normal. This surgery is anything but minor. But you need to go into it with a positive mind and do what you can to not think of "what ifs" and such. I lead a WLS support group in my area, and have post-ops in there ranging from newbies to 20 years out. What you can do to reduce your risk is to make sure you do the bowel prep the night before surgery - do all that your surgeon requires. No less. It's not fun, but having stuff in your bowels and stuff can be very bad, so get that sucker cleaned out! :toilet" Also, as soon as you are coherant and awake in your hospital room, WALK. WALK, WALK, WALK every time you get a chance because that reduces the risk of blood clots. Even if you get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, go for a quick lap around the halls in the hospital. If you do those two things, you are in good shape!! The rest is done by the surgeon and they do these kind of surgeries all the time. You have NOTHING to worry about. When I had my surgery done, I didn't even feel like anything was done. My abs hurt, but other than that I felt fine. It wasn't until the next morning when I got my leak test that I saw my little pouch and knew something had been done. I have lost 115 lbs since March, and I have another 100 to go. Having WLS was the best thing I ever did for myself. I have had NO regrets since my surgery, and I know that having WLS was the right thing to do for myself. Complications can happen in ANY surgery anywhere, anytime, any place and espeically in obese patients. An obese patient having their tonsils out is a greater risk than a normal weight patient. So it's not just WLS that there are risks, it's all surgeries. Don't let the negativity or what-ifs get you down. Trust me, you have NOTHING to worry about!!! Trisha Down 115 lbs since March PhoenixWLS Support Group Leader http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/PhoenixWLS/ "You must begin to think of yourself as becoming the person you want to be."

Your fears are definitely normal. I had them too. I can honestly tell you that this surgery wasn't anywhere near as bad as I thought (in my mind) it would be. I am 18 days out and doing great! Good luck. See you on the losing side! Susann

Hi Jeanette I had my surgery 11/14 and posted the same as you a few days before. I was so scared. I have 4 young children. I was a lightweight only 100 pounds over (imagine that, saying ONLY 100 pounds) and really had second thoughts. But then I thought about how many nights I prayed for God to help me lose weight, all the diets I failed, all of the clothes I couldnt wear, and how much energy I'd lost throughout the years. But I did it and honestly, it was easy. I was out of bed in 3 hours walking with no pain, no gas. Barix was phenomenol...we walked every 2 hours..I truly believe that helped. I was home 2 days later and in walmart the next day. I didnt do a bowel prep, it wasnt required by my surgeon. I have been on liquids for the last week and started full liquids today. It's been NO PROBLEM, I swear, not even one. Go in with a good attitude. You will be fine. Best of luck, whatever you chose. Laurel

I just had surgery on 11/10 and I had some of your pre-surgical thoughts, as well. However, I am very glad that I finally did it and I have already lost 23 pounds since I first walked into my surgeon's office. I feel good and have little pain. I am walking okay and plan to return to work soon. There are probably no studies showing early death from the surgery -- only studies mostly showing improved health. Go for it!

Try slippers... the surgery will be the first thing in your life for a long time that actually works!! I have never been happier since my surgery and since I started melting! Your fears tell me your normal.. it is ok to fear but remember faith is not believing God can it is beliving God will... and he has proved himself over and over and over... I am beliving HE WILL!! Linfa

Jeanette - we're surgery buddies! and I am in the same place you are. I'm cooking dinner for my family and friends, and I have found my mood to be very foul.... I'm snapping @ people for no reason. I cry @ the drop of a hat.....but you know something. YOU AND I - we can do this and WE WILL!!!! I've prayed to my lord for strength and peace in my heart. Good luck and Please keep in touch! See you on the loosing side. Barbi