Two years ago!

TWO YEARS!!! WOW where has the time gone!!! I wouldn't trade it for anything. BUT as I was warned it has been a heck of a ride. I won't lie these past two years have been some of the best times of my life but also some of the hardest emotionally. You don't get to the size I was by being able to rationally deal with even some of the everyday issues much less all the baggage of past hurts. For many many years I used food as my EVERYTHING mostly as my "drug of choice". And to a degree STILL do. I STILL go and talk to a counselor and don't plan to stop anytime soon. I decided before I had my surgery I'd do what ever it took to NOT be a failure. To not waste this blessing/gift that God had given me. I know that I committing a slow suicide by eating myself to death. And to quote a one of my very favorite posters.... Elle... "My tool still works" I just dropped another size. I've gone from a size 32/34 down to a 16!! I am still over 200lbs but for the most part I am very happy where I am. I am 200% healthier than I was at 380lbs. I can actually MOVE now and run with my child. EVERYDAY God blesses me with a WOW moment of some type. Some small and some large. Two years ago I wouldn't be the PTO president of my child's school. Nor would I be back in school full time myself for avionics technician. I had NO self esteem and to be honest NO self respect. I think that has been the hardest of the lessons I've been learning these last two years is to actually LOVE and RESPECT myself REGARDLESS of what others think or do. Unfortunately, that is one of things I am still working on everyday. Michelle