so disappointed in myself

Hi all - it's been a long time since I posted - I lost 100 pounds exactly no more no less... from 304 to 204 & well I've been able to walk & move & do so many htings - life's been pretty good... But there are some things that are not so good & I thought it was time to stop denying & post here & ask you nice perople to kick me in the butt & get me back on track... I've been eating poorly - can't seem to find enough protein...have some numbness in my fingertips cuse I don't consistently take my vitamins & B-12 & I am pale cause I know I don't get all the iron I need. My diet choices haven't been as good as they should I have however in the past week been making an effort. My "stomach" bothers me alot & so I eat pumpkin seeds daily - one big bag per day - the salt cannot be good for me but now I feel "addicted" I eat animal crackers - don't ask me why but these make my stomach not hurt I've cut way back - was eating one box every couple of days now it's one box for several weeks - solid protein is still really hard to get down - hurts I try to eat chicken but really can't. I'm disappointed in myself for not managing my personal care better & was really wondering - how are you all doing now that we're over a year out? Are you being religiously good? HAve you discovered that the surgery didn't solve all of your eating issues? Or did it? Have any of you gone to counseling? See a nutritionist regularly? Or what else have you done to keep yourself on track... I think the "easy" work is over & now the real - the hard work has begun... And please can you help me get back on track?

I have to say that I am with you. This in no way solved my eating issues. I know I did not get to 347lbs just because I like food. I am in the process of seeking counseling for issues related to my eating disorder, that is just what it is. I have held steady after a 163lbs loss, but for some reason just cannot get passed a certain mark. Hoping I can figure that out. I justified my "cheating" by saying it is low fat - sugar free, yeah, but not when you eat the whole bag. You are not alone, I think all of us are in the same boat on some level.

Pamela, I'm so glad you decided to come back.. You have been one of those faces I relied on to help keep ME going when I got down on myself.. So you know, you're not alone. NO I am not being religiously good.. In fact, I'd got the opposite direction and say I'm religiously not so good.. Surgery did NOT solve my eating issues.. it's helped me with portions and certain things.. but definitely not with my emotional eating.. I struggle with that every day (some days better than others.. some days like yesterday...) I haven't gone to counselling directly.. but I do find that there are people on these message boards who behave like counselling for me.. coming here and getting it off my chest.. talking it through.. it helps me. I don't have any fix-its for you, Pamela.. just an offer of my hand and shoulder for support... and really *you know what you need to do*.. if you're having trouble with white chicken.. try dark.. if you're having trouble with dark chicken.. try beef.. if you have trouble with beef.. try pork.. You know there are alternate sources of protein out there.. you have to make sure you're reading boxes and tracking what's going into your mouth each day.. and yes.. this IS the hard part... Try for a weekend eating JUST protein and no carbs.. If it's cheese.. fine. If it's peanut butter on an apple.. fine.. focus on getting as much protein in .. from ANY source as you can.. and get all your water in.. see if that jump starts you a little.. Check your carbohydrate level on those pumpkin seeds.. I'm sure they've got a little protein.. but maybe soynuts will be a better snack for you.. they are higher in protein and VERY crunchy.. and downright GOOD for you, too! Make protein your focus for a few days to see how you handle the habit.. and go from there.. Maybe it will also be helpful for you to make an appointment with your nutritionist for a follow up.. you don't have to wait until you're SUPPOSED to go.. if you need their help.. ask. The experts won't let you down.. Now dust yourself off and get back up on that horse, girl! Stef

I answered this a few posts up from yours. I hope it helps. It helps me to read of other struggling too. Thanks! Best, ~V~

How about a hug instead of a kick in the rump? I have good days and bad days. If I have a bad day, I don't beat myself up. I just do better the next. I do see a nutritionist every 6 months. I have a great meal planning sheet they gave me that you might find real helpful. I can send it to you if you like. It helps me if I get off track! At 1 year I had a metabolic test done and they told me how many calories I needed to be eating to maintain or loose. I think my nutritionist has been a real help in keeping me straight. If you don't have one, I would look into getting one that is knowledgeable of WLS. It does seem effortless at first, then you have to work at it. Nothing easy about it! I go through spells where I get hooked on something and eat it all the time and then I get tired of it and find something else to eat. It is normal. If foods are bothering your tummy, maybe call the doc and see if there is a problem. Bloodwork is a good idea if you haven't had any in a while. My doc says yearly, but I go every 6 months to my PCP for labs. Mine have been good. What are you taking as far as supplements? This is what I am taking: 1 Centrum Chewable/ 1 bariatric advantage iron tablet (passionfruit) 29mg after breakfast 1 Citracal creamy bites calcium citrate twice a day. (lunch & before bed) B12 Injection monthly , done myself I also use the following: LifeTime liquid calcium citrate, blueberry Bariatric Advantage Cinnamon lozenges So, 1. Make you a schedule for your supplements 2. Print my meal planning guide and put it on the fridge 3.Check on a nutritionist, maybe get a metabolic test. 4.Call and get appt with doc for labs (CBC, Folate & CMP) ask about B12 injections. 5. Add exercise. 6. Drink plenty of fluids. At least 64 oz a day. I hope this helped. You are not alone here. I get scared sometimes that I will not be able to keep it off. We will though and you will start loosing too!! Email me if you need to! Melinda

Hey M. Frank, I was just reading your post and would like to request if you could send me your meal planning sheet. I too have been having some problems with getting off track, with the right foods and with taking my supplements. I would really appreciate it. Any help would be good. Thanks in advance. Cathy

Hi Cathy! I have my days. I will send the meal planning sheet to your email address. Let me know when you get it! I do good with the supplement part, but I tend to eat a few too many carbs at night. It's all fat free or low fat stuff, but it mostly carbs. Hope it helps you, it does me. My nutritionist gave it to me. I go see them again in May. Let me know if I can help ya! Melinda

Wow! I came to the site today because I wanted some help in getting on track with my food intake and found your reply to this same question! I wondered if you would send me your meal planning guide. I think if I had something concrete I wouldn't play head games and eat poorly! I have just had an extended tummy tuck so I am eating a little bit more right now in order to heal. However soon I need to get moving with my exercise again and trim back the amount I am eating. I love your advice on this thread! You are right - we all get scared that the weight will come back. A lot of us are disapointed that we didn't make goal. (I still have 30 pounds to lose after having 16 removed!) We need reminders from each other that we all fall of the wagon - but we have to get ourselves in check and get back with the program. I am glad that we can support each other and just listen sometimes when one of us just needs to scream! Thanks for your advice, I needed to read it today! Virginia

I would be more than happy to send it to you! I really try to not be a "flammer". I see no reason in being mean, LOL. We are all in this together and I am more than happy to share my experiences and knowledge that I have learned during these 20 months so far. I am a good listener! I may not be able to solve everyones problems, but it helps sometimes to just be there for them and listen. Glad I was of help today!! Melinda