SOOOO disappointed!
I have been feeling so good about myself - lost 66 pounds as of Friday - down from a 28 to a 20, can cross my legs, started yoga - etc. etc.... Then today I saw a photo someone took of me just two weeks ago at an event - OMG - my behind was sooooo big & I was sooooo big!
Of course I realize that I certainly must be smaller than when i started which was even more disturbing - I WAS EVEN BIGGER!!!!
LOL - well - I'm not really beating myself up - But I think I want to put a moratorium on any photo taking of me until I reach goal 
Too funny - especially since I was just the other day thinking - I need to get a photo & see how great I'm looking NOT!!!
Ah well.
Too funny - especially since I was just the other day thinking - I need to get a photo & see how great I'm looking NOT!!!
Ah well. 
I was just thinking, this weekend, if I will ever be comfortable having my picture taken. I have been taking pictures of myself, but from a documentary standpoint. I had a picture taken the morning of surgery and another last week. Someone was able to put the photos side by side for me. Now I can finally see the changes. I plan on carrying the photos with me for those times when I need to focus on my goals. Hopefully a day will come when I will be comfortable in my own skin.
Take care,
Leann
I completely understand. My husband has this screensaver on the computer that is a revolving thing of pictures and I find myself cringing when I see some of them. 
It's like denial has set in and though I don't ever want to go back to that, it's almost as if I don't want to be reminded that I was there in the first place! 
What a quandry my thoughts are! I'm in a no picture taking mode myself these days. Yes, it would be neat to see the progress but right now all I would see is flappy arms and a saggy gut.
Despite the weight I have lost there are times that I'm not sure I really see it. It's because I never really saw myself as being as big as the numbers on the scale suggested. I see it now and it bothers me.
So.....rather than focus on the past, I'm just trying to keep my eye on the goal. Patience is my biggest problem these days! That dang scale isn't moving fast enough! Doesn't it know that bathing suit season is coming up! 
We'll get there though!
Take care,
Carey
243/181/130
It's like denial has set in and though I don't ever want to go back to that, it's almost as if I don't want to be reminded that I was there in the first place! What a quandry my thoughts are! I'm in a no picture taking mode myself these days. Yes, it would be neat to see the progress but right now all I would see is flappy arms and a saggy gut.
Despite the weight I have lost there are times that I'm not sure I really see it. It's because I never really saw myself as being as big as the numbers on the scale suggested. I see it now and it bothers me.
So.....rather than focus on the past, I'm just trying to keep my eye on the goal. Patience is my biggest problem these days! That dang scale isn't moving fast enough! Doesn't it know that bathing suit season is coming up! We'll get there though!
Take care,
Carey
243/181/130 
Hi Pam 
It is so funny, the minute we become health minded and on a path to losing all the weight we have gained, we become so judgemental of ourselves 
Just the other day, my company put a few of us up at the Hyatt because of the snow storm. I was sitting on the bed typing on my laptop 
and looked to the left and there was a full length mirror on the wall. I looked and thought, OMG I AM HUGE 
, even after losing -77 lbs. But one thing I have learned about myself is that I was one of the ones who were in so much denial about how big I really was . I guess I am different than some others because I always felt thin in my mind, or at least I used to tell myself that . 375 lbs is a lot of weight and a size 32 is not a slim size. Yes those 32's are falling off of me now and I can probably fit my 98 lb sister in them with me 
, but I still have a ways to go. Do I look good? Yes, and I feel great, but I am still 298 lbs. and have quite a ways to go to goal. I didn't gain all this weight overnight and won't lose it that quickly either 
But every pound lost is a little bit of self gained..And thank God for that 
Susan
11/24/04
375/298/190
It is so funny, the minute we become health minded and on a path to losing all the weight we have gained, we become so judgemental of ourselves Just the other day, my company put a few of us up at the Hyatt because of the snow storm. I was sitting on the bed typing on my laptop and looked to the left and there was a full length mirror on the wall. I looked and thought, OMG I AM HUGE , even after losing -77 lbs. But one thing I have learned about myself is that I was one of the ones who were in so much denial about how big I really was . I guess I am different than some others because I always felt thin in my mind, or at least I used to tell myself that . 375 lbs is a lot of weight and a size 32 is not a slim size. Yes those 32's are falling off of me now and I can probably fit my 98 lb sister in them with me , but I still have a ways to go. Do I look good? Yes, and I feel great, but I am still 298 lbs. and have quite a ways to go to goal. I didn't gain all this weight overnight and won't lose it that quickly either But every pound lost is a little bit of self gained..And thank God for that
Susan
11/24/04
375/298/190 
I totally understand how you feel. The pictures I see of myself before surgery makes me want to barf and after loosing over 70 pounds I still feel "huge". My family and friends tell me how great I look but I think I'm still in the "fat girl state of mind" as I don't see it. I have decided to keep a collage of pictures and only take pictures once a month to document how I've come down from the beginning. It'll make you appreciate yourself more when you reach your goal and see how your shape has changed.
I can definitely relate to the big behind syndrome. I tell people I must have the biggest butt in the world. I'm really getting self concious about it now as its sticking out more since my waist is getting smaller. I've been covering it up with sweaters and ponchos so its now that bad at the moment.
Anyway...keep up the good work!
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