Overly-sensative?

I'm curious..do any of you have co-workers or people you don't talk to much constantly asking if you should eat that or saying that they think its the easy way out? I have a few that are always stopping by. I haven't had anything to eat outside of what my doctor told me. Like the one day she asked that and I was eating cottage cheese? And they always say..oh I'm so jealous that you got the easy way out? Do you really think this is easy? I guess I see in some ways its nice to not be hungry (atleast I'm not) but man I sure could go for some fast food, ice cream or Pizza Hut Deep Dish Pizza MMM MMM I just didn't know if other people get these comments and if so how do you answer them? Maybe I am being overly sensative and be glad that if I do ever "cheat" that they will be right there to let me know. Thanks, Michelle

Michelle, I have not gone back to work yet, and am very nervous about these things as well. I will certainly be under scrutiny. I not only have those who are pretty ignorant about WLS but also two co workers who have had it and lost much more than me at this stage. So in addition to these comments I anticipate the "did you get your protein? did you drink all your water? are you taking your vits??" and finding whatever to tell me why I am not losing. I think this is a hurdle we all face. I am going to try eating alone or in some deserted area of the cafeteria so that at least during eating I can have some peace!! I think this is one of the difficult things we have to deal with ... watching to see if anyone has any great suggestions to handle this issue. B

Hi Michelle, Overly sensative? I think NOT! This is the hardest thing I've ever done in my entire life! So, if anybody ever had the nerve to tell me that WLS was taking the "easy way out"....I'd have to tell them that giving the health risks of being obese and going under the knife knowing that I may not make it out of surgery alive is NOT taking the easy way out! I would ask them if they thought it was easy to have any type of surgery? Or do they think it's easy that you can't ever overeat for the rest of their lives? I don't care who you are.....everyone has eaten too much food on occasion. Tell them that you still have to excercise and eat healthy food and that WLS was used as a tool to assist you in your journey to weight loss. Unfortunately, some people just aren't educated on WLS and they don't know what you've been through. It's hard for them to identify with you. I simply educate them on WLS. My boss and co-workers have asked questions and I welcome them to ask more. It's hard not to take offense to some of the things that they say but just know that you did this because you needed to take care of yourself. People will start to back off after awhile! Take care and good luck! Megan B

Go, Megan! You are right on target! I concur wholeheartedly. - Martha Bell

Ive been back at work for 3 weeks or so, and I am completely amazed at the balls some people have, and whats funny is I really don't think they think its ballsy or rude. I think they figure if you told the world you are having the surgery then you are fair game for their curiosity. I just get shocked when a male co-worker says "so how much have you lost?" Tonight one did and I said "I cant beleive you asked me that, dont you think its rude, would your wife smack you if she heard you?" lol But for him it was...he could see the changes and was asking about how often I go to the gym, and then wham with the weight Q. Maybe Im sensitive too, but I have always been, and this big spot light is kinda nerve racking. I regret telling so many people, I wish my mother hadnt told the other half of the world..family etc. They are all now watching waiting expecting. Im a med ab tech, my close co-workers I deal with, nurses that come to the lab I tend to change the subject or shift the conversation...it is none of their buisness how many pounds I lost. My mother...a whole different story...she has WLS about 13 years ago...things were so different, and she has kept most off, but eats normal portions. I find if I had the nerve Id tell her everything she is doing wrong, but I dont. But she on the other hand has no problem telling me how and what I should be doing. When she calls to see how Im doing I get touchy. Finally I told her " I will give you specific numbers when I feel like its significant, otherswise be happy with Im doing fine etc" I think you should set them straight, give them this website or others as resources to enlighten their small uneducated skinny minds. For those that have had it, remind them we are all different, and no two lose alike, are shaped alike, or can tolerate the same things. Set the boundaries on what is acceptable to ask. And tell them the things you feel sensitive about, and that those things will only be discussed if you yourself bring it up specifically. This is not the easy way out, you and I know it. And sometimes in order to get your feelings respected you just have to ask for it and expllain why what they are saying or doing is disrespectful. Ok off my soap box Michelle M.

My boss at least once a week asks, so what are you weighing now? or how much have you lost ...and this drives me crazy .... worse still is when she shares that amount with her family and rounds it up! I mean, you and I both know ...25 isn't the same as 30 ...each pound makes a difference ... or at least to me it does .... and I understand completely. My mom had WLS in May 2003. She lost 150lbs but i think she might be gaining some back, not that she would tell me. She can eat tons of mashed potatoes, sugar etc ...but not the protien- she can't tolerate the meats or so she says but I've watched her eat ice cream sandwiches and she lives off of potato soup .... and I do say something about it - when I see her eating fudge or something along those lines. We live together so sometimes having that crap in the house directly effects me ... and while she doesn't dump- at least admittedly dumping, i know I do ...hot chocolate- no sugar added hot choc w/ splenda and i was running to the bathroom .... me on the other hand, as long as it isn't fried or got smoke flavoring, I do pretty good w/ protien. ok, i've ranted enough, but I completely know where you are coming from ...

I think that people generally care, but are just ignorant about our situation. If someone says something that I feel is rude, I just say, "you are welcome to ask questions, but that comment hurt my feelings." If they are your friend and truly care about your feelings, they will apologize and try to learn more about wls. If they aren't, they may get upset, but then you will know that they weren't trying to be supportive, they were just being rude and probably jealous!!! But, I know it is hard to take comments! Especially with all of the hormones we have running through our bodies now! I read that all of our fat stored huge amounts of estrogen and now that we are burning those fat stores, the estrogen is being released into our bodies in huge amounts! So, this might add a little to our sensitive feelings!!! Anyway, be strong! You have made a great decision for yourself and as long as you know that, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks!!!!

Thank you to all the applied. First I am glad to know that I am not the only one who has the same things going on. I can be a tad over-sensative at times And those are some really awesome ideas for me to take back to work with me. Most of the people that do this are not really friends..just co-workers. My true friends are awesome. But I just wanted to say thanks for all the help. ~Michelle

Michelle, Tell them to worry about there own food intake and you will take care of your self, that will put them in there place. I had friends always doing that to me until they were the over weight ones and I was not. They are really trying to sabatoge you because they are jealous. You will pose a threat that they will no longer have you be the big person in the group they will be the big one. My family never told me what to eat only my so called friends did that to me. 2 1/2 years later and a size 2-4 I will still eat what I want and when I want. Take Care Cindy Ca. 290/135 -155lbs.

I was recently in the hospital with a stricture that needed dilating. The nures in the ER gave me a 1 quart container to drink as pre-CT scan. I just looked at her and said' that's my water allowance for the DAY!" And she looked at me weird. Then when I got to CT, the techniqtion gave me more to drink. I had some but had to tell her " my stomach is the size of an egg. This is all I can drink and not throw up!" So if medical people are clueless, non-medical people are too. I tell friends and family to go get a 1/4 cup measure and think about that being an entire meal! I know this is not the Easy way but I think we need to educate people about the specifics. This can be done in a non threating way. I would say " you too can lose this weight if you eat 3 meals of 1/4 cup and less than 500 calories." Hope this helps. Kathy