Scared... Normal???

OK Guys, MY surgery is Friday.. Everyone's asking me am I nervous? not really.. Am I excited? don't know.. I will tell you though I am SCARED!!!! I am so scared that something's going to happen, I can't leave my kids and hubby... I have prayed that this is the right things for me to do. and I have a Surgeon that I trust.. I'm not worried about the changing in eating habits, thats what I am having this for.... I just hugged and loved on my babies (son 4 and daughter 1) all weekend... I gave them erxtra kisses, took lots of pictures... I am actually sitting here crying now.. Everyone tells me that I will be ok. and I trust God, I just have always had a horrible fear of death.... I have total Faith in God above, I would just like this fear to calm. I need all the prayers that I can get. I need to feel ok... I hope someone understands how I feel.... I mean I'm not scared all the time.. There are times that I am very calm.... oh well. God Bless Kim

Kim, bless your heart! I totally share your range of emotions as my own time grows nearer. I am scheduled four days behind you, on the 16th. I find it very hard to focus on much of anything else that really requires my attention, such as everyday mundane things, or even concentrating on what someone is saying to me. I find that I have to continually say, "I'm sorry...what were you saying??" Last night, I could not sleep without first having a good cry. I tried not to, and just laid there shaking with nervousness, but finally gave in and "boohooed," then fell alseep. From what I have seen of many others' posts, what you are feeling is quite normal. I keep trying to tell my own self that...that I am not feeling anything out of the ordinary with this type of life-changing, life-altering surgery. I don't know what I would do without my faith in the Almighty! I find myself praying to God many times a day, now...and it really does bring me peace when I do. I have no choice but to leave it in His hands and I pray that He will see fit to allow me to pull through this, and have a long and fulfilling life with my family and friends. God bless you, you will be in my thoughts and prayers! Pat

My Kim, you sound exactely like ME!!! My surgery is scheduled for Wednesday the 10th, and what you just said, fits me to a T!!! I have thought alot about my kids and my husband!! My one child, my daughter, has epilepsy and that really worries me...I worry about her!! I am not worried about how I will cope with the food so much, because I have been on protein shakes for the last month so I have had to cope and mourn the food part already!! Heck, I will be glad to have 1 bite of something...lol!! I have so many people praying for me and I have been praying too!! I tell you, if it wasn't for my faith, I would be even worse!! I know that God will take care of me!! I trust God that I will be fine!! I, too, have always had a horrible fear of death. As for myself, and my faith in the Lord, I just know that it is satan that is putting these fears, doubts and apprehensions in my thoughts...those thoughts do not come from God and that is what I keep trying to remember! Honestly, I have even thought about writing letters to my kids and my husband and parents......just in case!! Is that not awful?? I am going to just continue to pray!! Kim I will be praying for you!! Please remember me in your prayers too!! If you would like to talk, please email me anytime!!!

Teresa, I understand about the letters. I've thought about the same thing. My surgery is in the morning and I am finally starting to get nervous. I'm so stressed out over working a contract for a seller of mine that I'm ready to fall down. When it all comes down to it though, none of this death business is in our hands. We just have to choose wisely, trust implicitly, and pray fervently. Good luck to you and all that are feeling these same tugs. xoxo Alice

Kim, My surgery is on the 18th and I'm just as scared as you. My kids are bigger than yours but I'm still terrified. I'm a single mom. It's normal to worry but I still pray the surgeon will take good care of me.I never thought I could love anyone as much as I love them

Kim, I live in Madison Heights (just outside of Lynchburg) I am having lap RNY on the 29th at UVA. I am very excited...but I am also scared!!! Everyone is telling me that I will be okay, that they don't think anything bad is going to happen. But I remind them "you never know". I have 4 young daughters, and a wonderful husband. Yesterday as I was getting ready for church I told him all my "just in cases" and I cried! I think the closer it gets the more nervous I will be. Since I have become a mother, I pray every minute of every day that God will allow me to raise them into beautiful women. I don't want to miss a beat of their lives. My life is very good, I can't complain. I guess I just wanted to let you know that I am near by and feel the exact same as you. I will pray for you...please let me know how you are doing! God Bless

I am scheduled for Nov 15th and I am the very same way. I have wrote "just in case letters". I am however stuck. I wanted to write 6 and have only got three done. I can't write them without crying. I started crying last night, just thinking that I might not see my son again just about kills me. I have tried to calm myself by praying everyday. I know how you feel. Michelle

I feel the same way. I am so very excited about having the surgery done... but there is this feeling.. what if something happens. I have gone through some things with my husband if case something bad happens. I know things happen for a reason and God has a plan for me and for you. Like you, I am a young woman with a lot of great things ahead of me.. my husband and family. I just know you must have faith in God and know you are having this surgery for a reason. You need to trust God, your surgeon and yourself that this is the RIGHT choice and you wouldn't turn back the clock. Keep your head up and go in there with a smile on your face. You will be just fine. Look at how many people are having or have had this surgery... we are all a little scared but we know this is right. Good luck sweetie and God bless you through your surgery. Jennifer Wright

Hey Kim I feel EXACTLY how you feel and I too am sitting here crying. I go in on the 15th. I have a 3 year old and a 2 year old and I can't imagine not being there for them or them having to grow up without a mommy because I couldn't get this weigh thing under control. I too feel I can deal with the change in eating and all the psychological stuff that come with this but the kids and the family part just about tear me up. Keep in touch let me know how you are doing. Tina

One of my friends sent this to me today and I thought I would share with all of you!! I have felt a pretty overwhelming sense of peace in the last 24 hours and I know that prayers are really working miracles right now!!! Do not look forward to the changes and chances of this life in fear; rather look to them with full hope that , as they arise, God, whose you are, will deliver you out of them. He has kept you hitherto,-do you but hold fast to His dear hand, and He will lead you safely through all things; and, when you cannot stand, He will bear you in His arms. ... The same everlasting Father who cares for you today, will take care of you tomorrow, and everyday. Either He will shield you from suffering, or He will give you unfailing strength to bear it. Be at peace then and put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginations. Stand still and let God work today. Do not fear, He will never leave you or forsake you. I hope this helps some of you!! Know that I am also praying for each of you!! We can do this!! My surgery is tomorrow morning at 7:30 and although I am nervous, I know that I am in my Father's Hands!!! God bless each of you!!