Is it possible...

to feel TOO normal? My activity on the boards has diminished greatly. like so many of us. In the past I have taken breaks from posting, but that was usually due to a mild depression. I just didn't feel like "talking". But now I find that I feel so "normal" that I find myself interacting more with the folks around me and this has led me away from the boards. I find myself feeling more at home in my new body. I still remember the fat girl and still see her in the mirror from time to time. But her appearances are getting fewer and farther between. I still have issues with my size. I buy sweaters in mediums when smalls would fit. I am amazed that my size 6 slacks have room in them but I haven't dared to try a smaller size. I think I am afraid that the fat girl will come out of nowhere and shout nasty things to me if a 4 is too snug. I can see her charging at me through the mirror and saying, "Just what do you think you are doing? You are still fat. Who are you trying to kid? Did you really think you could wear a 4? Not in this lifetime!" It's funny how the girl with whom I was so comfortable, has now become my nightmare. I know I am changing more on the inside than I have on the outside. It scares me. It excites me. But most of all I find myself more at home in the real world. I know I'm rambling, but can anyone relate? Am I alone or is this common at the 14-15 month mark to feel this way?

Hi Annette! I know how you are feeling!! I find myself with more confidence than I have had in the last 20 years! I also find myself still heading to the "Plus Size" department when shopping for clothes....I find myself looking at my size 10's and thinking, "there is no way on earth you are going to fit into those!" Imagine my surprise when I am able to fit into them! It is scary....it is exciting! Holly

Hello from the 'other' Annette. It seems that there is much less activity here. Maybe because we have entered the real world, we have fewer issues, there are fewer hurdles to jump, or who knows what. You voiced so many of my own feelings. Scared and excited perfectly describes my emotions. Go for the size 4's and rejoice. You have worked hard to get here. Just look at your tummy ... you have the scars to prove it. When I first took the smaller size into the dressing rooms I ended up in tears. Darned hard to accept that they fit over my hips. It should have been easy but I swore there was a mistake on the tags and somebody was playing a nasty trick on me. the 4's are now getting baggy too. Even so, when I pull them out of my closet I am positive they will be too tight. The fat girl taunts me daily. Every morning I am afraid she will 'come out' once again. They warned us that the surgery was on the body and NOT on the brain. No kidding, this is harder than losing the weight in many respects. You are not alone with these thoughts and feelings. This seems to be the part of WLS we didn't know about so well in advance. We will adjust. We will learn to accept ourselves in this new outer shell as time passes. Maybe because I am sooo much older than many of you, I'm 60 years old, but my inner self was already well established. there have been fewer changes there which I attribute to being a wife, raising children, being a grandmother and life in general. I wish you well. Thank you for voicing the thoughts which I understand. You are not alone. Annette