Visit with my pcp....

Well, not the visit I was expecting. She was stunned to see me and how I've changed since January. She asked all about me, how I was doing. told her how I wish the weight loss was more proportioned (legs in particular) and she proceeded to say how they have gone down dramatically... I may not see it, but they have drastically gone down; in any event, she dropped the word "lymphadema"... saying, you do have some lymphedema down there... that sent me into a tailspin. Just hearing the word. I was like, that's what I have? You never said that to me before? She went on for nearly an hour that it's not the stage of lymphedema that I read about - that it's regressing - and she's always put down in my charts and insurance paperwork that I've had that. She said my legs will go down but the lymph nodes are so stressed due to the years of weight on them, they will never go down to Barbie size, but I will be able to wear dresses, capris, etc... (she was saying all this to make me feel better because I couldn't compose myself). She went on to say that people who are pregnant and get swollen legs, that is called lymphedema, too; there are just different degrees and mine is not at such a degree where I, # 1, need to go to a specialist, # 2, will not need that debulking surgery. I just heard that word and that's all I can think about now and can't stop with the waterworks. In any event, she said all my #'s look phenomenal. She commented on how good my face looks and she would have thought I would have lots of wrinkles due to the loss, and is amazed at how young my face looks. She said don't take the fish oil, we don't need it, and it will cause indigestion and you'll be burping up a fish taste/smell. She said my hair is thin, but not so noticeable as I think it is, and that it will grow back - like everyone else keeps telling me; but I just cant stand this stage of where I am right now. Seeing her reaction to her seeing me made me feel really great- but that was quickly diminished when she dropped the L word.

So sorry you are feeling down Michelle. I am sure that with what ever you can lose in your legs will and has been a plus. I have skinny lower legs from the knees down but the upper thighs I hate. They are much better than what I had before surgery. I have a problem with my left thigh. About 17 years ago I was in a car accident and was T-boned by another car. I wa**** on the passenger side thank God, but when we had inpact it threw me sideways to the right and my leg wa**** hard by the stirring wheel. I had a half moon shaped black and blue bruise for a long time. The I noticed as I got older and put on weight that I had this funny pocket of fat that was developing on that thigh...it was the same shape that the bruise was. I must have messed up the fat tissue and caused it to grow funny. If I wear tight pants it sticks out like a sore thumb. No matter how much weight I lose...I still have it and I don't like it. I guess I could maybe have lipo on it but I am not all into that. I guess I have watched too many shows on the Health Discovery Channel to even think about any type of weight or skin reductions. So what I hear that you are saying is that no matter how much weight you lose you are still going to have big legs? I think that is very command in alot of women that has had this surgery. You are not alone my friend. So what, it is not going to make you less beautiful. You are very pretty and I am sure you are just as sweet as can be. That is all that matters. God did not make supermodels....they made themselves. We are the honest to God version of a woman. Real women have meat on their bones...sometimes we have a little more than we should....we see the problem and know the health risks and have WLS. What we end up looking like in the end is always a gift. We may not end up looking like supermodels but we sure do live a happier, healthier life. Don't let your legs make you feel ugly....you have sooo much more going for you right now. Enjoy life to the fullest like there is no tomorrow. Lisa S

Sorry to hear you are feeling blue right now. I hope you have been able to process what the doctor said though....that it is regressing and that you do not need add'l appts due to it. Add to that everything Lisa S. said. I agree with her totally!!! You are beautiful just the way you are. So what if your legs aren't super model skinny. Heck, look how J.Lo and Beyonce have turned having a booty and legs into something WONDERFUL!! Strut your stuff and be proud. Love ya!! Susan

I so know the fear you are feeling. When I was over 400lbs that was one of my worst fears was getting lymphadema. I was lucky and didn't end up with it but I know that if I had stayed at that weight for very long that I would have ended up with it. I have no great words of wisdom other then to say at least she didn't feel that it would be a full blown case of it and it would be something that would not hamper you in any way. I say live with the "word" for a day or two and then take a deep breath and move on to what ever is the next stage in your journey. You are looking wonderful. You are getting thinner every day and no matter what you face you will always be facing it LIGHTER! Always here for you if you need to chat ok!! Felicia =0)

Oh, Michelle, I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this! Try to keep remembering how far you have come. You are doing awesome! Jenn

Michelle, Keep your chin up. There are other people on line who have had that as well and if you look at their legs now they look great. Do not give up hope. I know there is a board on here as well for people how have had it. On the bright side of it you do not need a specialist and no more suregery. That is a great thing!! Sending lots of tissue your way. Keep your chin up! We are all here for you. I am glad she said to not worry about the fish oil. I burp enough I do not need they tasting or smelling like fish. Not sure hubby would appreciate that one. LOL In your pictures your hair looks great. I agree that it is not noticable. I am glad she had a great reaction to you. That is great! Big Hugs coming your say, Melissa