Visit with my son

We just got home from visiting my son in jail. It was not a very good experience. My parents took my husband and I. I spoke with my son for a while then lost it. My mom lost it as soon as we got in the room to speak to him. We had to go into what looked like a little closet and with two little windows in it along with 2 chairs. We had to talk threw some small wholes in the bottom of the window. We could hardly hear one another. After I was unable to talk anymore, my dad sat down and talked with Chris and I could tell my dad was getting a little choked up a few times. My husband never said a word to Chris . That pissed mom and I off royally! I asked him when we got back in the car why he didn't say anything to Chris and he said that the only thing he probably could have said was "I told you so!" Needless to say it pissed me and my mom off the right way!!! Mom wouldn't talk at all on the way home. Lisa S.

oh lisa, my heart is just breaking for you. i can't imagine being in your situation. not that my son is an angel... he has had his share of trouble. he was arrested at 18 for possesion of marijuana, but the charges were dropped when the actual owner fessed up (there were 5 of them in a car when they got stopped and searched. one of the boys had less than a joint's worth of dope, and he shoved it under the seat. their eyes were all bloodshot because they had been in the pool all day). none of the kids would say whose it was, so they all got arrested and spent 6 hours in jail. he didn't even call us. he knew better!! he did tell us the next day though, and we helped him find an attorney. it cost him a fortune, so i hope he learned his lesson. although last week the hr person at his part time job called him in to ask him about "his arrest". he had to be fingerprinted for his internship at smith-barney, and that's how they found out. i was told it wouldn't be on his record. well, i called his attorney, and there is no "conviction" on his record, but the arrest will always show unless we have it "expunged". to have that done is $1500. so my son will be broke again. we will pay for it, but he has to pay it back monthly. i don't want that following him around the rest of his life though. i am continuing to pray that your son is innocent. my husband and i have always spoken to our son about how "no means no", but i have to be honest, i don't know what he would have done in a situation where the girls were asking for it. i would hope that he would consider the age difference, and we always spoke with him about that too, but then again, they aren't always thinking with the right "head". i just hope that he did as he said and they have no dna evidence. are the girls saying anything either way about your son? i'm thinking about you, jpatricia

Thanks so much Patricia for sharing that with me. I will keep that in mind in the event that he is found innocent....he will still have the arrest on his record. I think if a person is found innocent that the record should be wiped clean...arrest and all! As if it never happened. I have not heard a word about what all these girls are saying now. I am just hoping that the DNA doesn't take months to come back like the officer said it could. I hate to think he will have to serve all that time and be innocent until the DNA comes back. My phone bill will be out the roof!!! He calls collect every night and talks to me and he also calls his grandparents (my mom and dad). I would really hate to tell him to only call once a week...I know he is lonely. I have unlimited long distance but of course that will not cover collect calls from a pay phone....they are very expensive. Keep up the prayers Lisa S.

HI LISA DNA tests take up to 18 months in South Africa. we do have the option of having it done privately, and paying for it from pocket. maybe if you are able to you can check if the samples on your side can be done privately, that way the results can come back within two weeks.

*big hugs* to you sweetie. I can't even begin to imagine what you must be going thru right now. Just know you are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm here if you ever need to talk. Susan

Thanks so much hun!!! I think this is the worse thing I have ever gone threw. I know it could be worse things to happen but really hope that it never does. Maybe we can chat on yahoo one day when I can catch ya on Thanks a bunches!!! Lisa S.

Lisa... I hope you are right and that this is the worst thing you ever have to endure! I'd love to chat with you. I'm bad about remembering to turn on my yahoo messenger though. There was a time I'd spend hours everyday IMing with people....now I rarely do. Strange, huh? I do think about it 1-2 times a week, but no one is ever on when I sign in. Susan

Ok, well maybe next time I see you sign into Yahoo I will try to catch you Lisa S.