Kind of a disturbing discovery...

Has anyone else noticed, since losing some weight, that stranger are nicer to you? I don't think it's me. Yeah, I feel better physically and better about how I look, but I don't think I'm putting out vibes that I am any more accessible. Still me...usually friendly, sometimes *****y, often in my own world. But...I could swear that people are treating me more nicely than they were 77 lbs ago...and, frankly, I'm finding it a bit disturbing. Are there really that many bigots out there that feel they can treat people badly just because they've judged them on their body size? That sucks. Really. Like, I didn't deserve a kind smile or the bus driver waiting for me to get across the street or a friendly hello four months ago and now I do? Why? What's that all about??? There really are some surprising emotions that go along with this weight loss... Lisa

Yup...I've noticed it too Lisa. And, it's distressing. We are all people, no matter our size. Everyone deserves the same treatment, but unfortunately, they do not get it. Makes me very angry....and makes me doubly aware of how I treat people. I've made a vow to myself to NEVER be one of THOSE people who are only nice to "the beautiful people". I don't think I've ever been that way....but after being on the discriminated against side, I know that I will always be aware of it! Hugs to you sweetie. Susan

I guess if we can carry on in kindness ourselves, after our own experiences of being discriminated against, it adds a new dimension to what we've gone through. It's sad, though...how much effort does it take to smile at someone? And it can change a person's whole day. Hugs back, Lisa

I will let you know when I get down to a weight where people start treating me differently lol. *huggles* Felicia =0)

WOW! I actually just started noticing the same thing in the last week or so. I am down 87 pounds since Oct. 11, 2006, now suddenly the same people I have been passing in and out of the huge building I work in are saying hello, making small talk, holding the elevators for me and smiling........its not the people in my office but just people from other offices in the same building. It makes me mad that 4 months ago I could be going towards the elevators and they would let it close and go without me and now suddenly they are shoving 1/2 their arm out the door to keep it from closing and waiting for me to get there to it. It pretty disturbing to me as well : ( I just promise myself I will never be like them. Margo Marie

I have noticed this as well! It is very heartbreaking for me that people do this sort of thing is you do not weigh this or that amount. IT should not be about a ## that we weight but what is on the inside. I am so never going to be like that!! Thanks for the reminder of this behavior. Hugs~~ Deanne

i had to get some gym shoes today, noticed the owner eyeing me and then i squared my shoulders and asked for discount ... unheard of here ... and i got it, lol. i cant believe it! i may even be able to get back some of that money i had to spend on the op this way, lolololol

I can not say that I have noticed it. maybe like Felicia those of us who had more to lose will notice it soon. No one has treated me any different at all. I will let ya know when I see the difference. Melissa

I've noticed the same thing. I'm down 93 pounds and I've noticed that people talk to me more in the store, doctor's office, work, etc. People I've seen at work but may not actually know (we have a huge office), are now looking me in the eyes and asking me how I'm doing today. Some are even holding the door for me now. At first I was a little flattered, but the more it happens, the more uncomfortable I get. And when I really think about it, the more angry I get about it. How come I didn't deserve to have the door opened for me when I was 93 pounds heavier? How come they couldn't look me in the eye before? At my heaviest, I always thought people were staring at me. But it seems the heavier I was, the more invisible I was. Now that I'm thinner, I'm noticed a lot more. It's an adjustment, and one I'll have to keep working on. I'm glad we have this website so we can see that we're all in the same situation and maybe can help each other with these new emotions. Jeannette

LISA, YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE. ISN'T IT AMAZING WHAT LOSING SOME WEIGHT WILL DO IN TERMS OF OTHER PEOPLE NOTICING YOU? BEFORE, WHEN WE WERE 50 - 70 # OVERWEIGHT WE WERE INVISABLE TO PEOPLE OR THEY LAUGHED OR SAID SNIDE REMARKS BEHIDE OUR BACKS. NOW THAT WE'RE DOWN A FEW POUNDS, YES I SAID A FEW, BECAUSE I STILL HAVE ALOT MORE TO GO, ABOUT 100# WE'RE MIRACULOUSLY GETTING NOTICED. FOR EXAMPLE, I WAS SITTING IN MY CAR AT A TRAFFIC LIGHT THE OTHER DAY, MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS AND COULD FEEL SOMEONE WATCHING, YOU KNOW THE FEELING. WELL I LOOKED OVER TO MY LEFT AND LOW AND BEHOLD HERE'S A LITTLE BOY ABOUT 25, I SAY LITTLE BECAUSE I'M 51, NOT BLINKING, CHECKING ME OUT. AT FIRST I THOUGHT HE WAS LOOKING AT MY CAR, I MUST ADMIT IT'S NICE, A SILVER MONTE CARLO, THEN I REALIZED HE WAS LOOKING RIGHT AT ME. I GAVE HIM THAT LOOK, YOU KNOW THE ONE, WELL HE SMILED BIG TIME AND WAVED, POINTED TO A PARKING LOT, LIKE I'D PULL OVER, NOT!!!. WELL, BEING THE MATURE ADULT THAT I AM, THE LIGHT TURNED GREEN, I STUCK MY TOUNGE OUT AT HIM AND HIT THE GAS, LEFT HIM IN THE DUST. MORAL OF THE STORY? YES THERE ARE ALOT OF BIGOTS IN THIS WORLD AND UNFORTUNETELY WE, AS OBESE PEOPLE RECEIVED ALOT OF THAT BIGOTRY. I FOR ONE HAVE NEVER AND WILL NEVER TREAT ANYONE DIFFERENTLY THAN I HAVE IN THE PAST. DONNA, SFY