Here we go again!!

Ok..I have to tell my sisters what happened today. My DH and I were talking about a friend of mine and marriage today and he made the comment :Since by arm was twisted into marriage, but I am glad I married you.: What the HE..! The story goes like this...When we meet we rushed into living together...I fell deeply in love. We had our problems, he left about a month in a half into the relationship because he was still in love with a ex and he couldn't deal with my weight. He was back within 48 hours and yea I let him come back. Well as the relationship progressed and 1 and half years went by I decided it was time to talk about marriage. We did and I told him that I wanted to be engaged by the end of July and if not then we needed to seperate to see if we were right for each other. Then my mom passed away in June and three weeks later he gave me a ring. We got married in December of that year, one reason is we got married on my parent's anniversary. His idea... I did give him the ultimatium and now 2 years later he mentions his arm was twisted. What the HE>>! I have said in the past he married me because I gave him the ulitmatium but he always disagreed saying he wanted to...now I feel awful. With everything that has gone on...what have I done...I love him!! Thank you for listening to me...I know you guys are thinking we won't survive this but I will not give up and the thing about it is that I am determined to make this work. I have always thought our marriage was great!! I still think it is or am I fooling myself!! Hugs,

Hugs to you Angela. I really don't know what to say other than, I am here anytime you need to talk. Love ya girl!!! Susan

angela, pardon for saying so, maybe you are being over-sensitive. guys like to say things like 'my arm was twisted into marriage.' maybe when he says it again, you can respond with a 'and just look how happy you are!' or a 'arent you happy you did?' and give him a hug and a kiss and drag him off to the bedroom!

Angela, I really don't know what to tell you, but I think alot of times when a man says something like "my arm was twisted" it is because he is insecure in himself. Maybe is feels threatened by your weight loss and he is scared that you will find someone and leave him and he is just trying to protect himself. I really can't tell you what goes on in a man's head just like they can't figure out what is going on in our head. If the problems continue I would seriously consider marriage counseling before things get worse. Sometimes ignoring the problem is easier than dealing with the problem, but easier isn't always the best solution. Keep the line of communication open. Let me know how that made you feel and vise versa let me know that if you say something that hurts him you want to know so that you can both talk it out. Don't give up try to find out what the root problem is until you know that you can't come up with a solution. Best of luck. We are all here when and if you need us. Teresa

I have come to the conclusion that I have overreacted...this darn hormones! I am wearing my feelings on my sleeves. I guess I am a little on the scared side myself...insecure...the whole nine yards. Thank you guys for listening!! Hugs,