Awkward dinner parties and profile pics

My parent's friends invited me (and my parents) to their house for dinner last night with 7 other people. I am still on a very restricted diet, but figured I could find something to eat. Well, we sit at the table and are having lasagna, salad and bread. I can't eat salad yet - or bread. If I wasn't vegetarian, I could have eaten the meat and cheese of the lasagna. So, I sat there with no plate in front of me while everyone else ate. I wasn't feeling hungry or envious of their food, but I just felt weird watching them all eat. A few days ago, I went to a chorus rehersal (I sing with a 150 member women's barbershop group - very dorky, but it's the only outlet for my singing around these parts!) at someone's home. There were 10 of us, and we ate afterwards. I had some cheese spread, cheese off a pizza, and one grape - probably under 3 oz. total. That made me feel not too much like an outcast. The only crappy part was when a woman, who is apparently famous for baking, brought out her cheesecake! We all sat in the living room - everyone with a giant slab on their plate and me jus****ching them all again. The worst part was the constant, "Wow, this is amazing!", etc. I can't wait until I can eat more variety so I don't feel like a huge freak. After rehersal each week, we go to TGIF. Last week, I didn't eat before going, so that I could order a veggie patty there (no bun or sides). We didn't get there until 10 PM and veggie burgers were sold out! The waiter kept trying to offer me other vegetarian options - salads, mozzerella sticks, etc. and I kept having to say "No, sorry, I can't eat that." He must have thought I was some psychotic dieter and if he had said one more word to me, I felt like I was going to have to explain my surgery to a stranger to stop him from trying to find me something on the menu! Anyone else have trying outings like this? I'm sure you must! Any funny ones? Please share! Also, I finally added 2 photos to my profile. I need a recent face shot to put on my posts, but at least you can get the idea of what I look like - not always too pretty! Brenda 273/240/140

Hi Brenda, i had my surgery on halloween as well. I had to attend a wedding on november 12th and it was terrible. There was so much food everywhere. The funny thing is that i was not hungry at all but i had everybody come to me that knew of my surgery and say oh Lisa i am so sorry are you ok....I couldnt stand that feeling. For dinner i asked them to serve me some broth and a little mashed potatos and ricotta. I took maybe 3 spoons and i was done. I hated eveyone watch what i was eating. But now that i am 7 weeks out i am feeling much better. I recently tried a few things outside the house. I tried half of a soft chili taco with just cheese on it and i tolerated it well. I also had half of a slice of thin crust pizza and also tolerated well. These are not things that i will be eating often but in case i am out and need to get something at least i know i can tolerated them. Today we had BBQ for dinner and i just had some rotiserie chicken and i tried corn on the cob....Did very well with that also. I wish you luck trying new foods. But the only way to know if you can tolerate is to try. I have lost 43 pounds so far and i am feeling good. LisaMarie

I agree with Lisa Marie....the pity parties for me are wayyy too much. I dont feel hungry, yes I wish I could chow down are piece of cake now and then, no it doesnt bother me if you want to eat.....it just goes on and on. The lastest for me is Christmas baking. I, before my stay at home mom days, was a saute and pastry chef, so cooking and baking, whether I eat it or not, is something that I really enjoy doing. And these people, friends and family, will not stop with their comments. I just wish that when people ask me how I am doing would just accept the fact that I am happy, I feel great and no longer need to have huge amounts of food to make myself feel good.....although, it would make everyone else feel better..lol. Sorry I got a little off subject. Missy

Brenda... Who are you kidding you are very pretty!!! I tried ordering water and not drinking it but I would always forget and start drinking it when I wasn't suppossed to...so now I just say no drink and they look at me funny but then they just drop it.... I went to a Thanksgiving dinner and was like yeah turkey and I was so psyched up until I took my first bite and it was laced in sugar..I simply explained myself and left because I was very, very hungry... Now I always bring something I can eat just in case... Jenn

You are beautiful Brenda!

I usually just say that my stomach is a little upset & just drink some water. That way I don't need to explain that I can't eat what ever it is that they have. If they got pushy, which I haven't had to deal with I would just say I really don't want to vomit all over your nice clean house, haha. I always thought that would quite them down. People are all trying to be nice and accomadating and offer up everything they have, unfortunatly when you are still in your 8 weeks post-op you are very limited. People just don't tend to have a can of refried beans or some nice pureed soup sitting as the main part of a party, go figure. I'm in my 10th week and I feel like the clouds are finally parted and I can eat more normally. I need to make an appointment with my nutrionist to get some more information on what I should be eating.