Ok I was near 300 lbs and every other day I hear "Look at You, You have such a pretty face to bad Your heavy you would be a doll" I have heard that since I was a small child even from my Mother. UGH !! Ok Here I am in a size 12/14 still have 20 lbs till goal and I am sure atleast 15 is skin anyway ......... Growing up You dream about being "Thin" Daily then Prom and seeing friends on dates and cruising the mall and all that I have grown up a lot since then but the dream of what it would feel like to be smaller has been relatively the same. I am with the man I love and beautiful children I am pretty active now and can do things I used to only dream about so life is much better I feel funny not heading straight to the PLUS SIZE rack anymore and all..... So with things going so good why is it I feel like a failure ? I look in the mirror and my face looks like a skeleton I am 29 yrs old and have major laugh lines the "Pretty Face is gone" and with it the dream of what I would be like thin I mean the skin OMG I thought I would have some but I have a roll that keeps on rolling and then one on top of it!! LOL and the legs are like wrinkled pups. I set and look down and still feel as wide as I ever was because when I am setting at my desk I still only have a couple inches and would be touching both handles on my chair not to far from where I was pre surgery. My upper legs still look as wide as a cabinet door (like those double door metal cabinets) How could I wear such smaller sizes from a 36/38 jean to a 12/14 if I am still so big? I try to convince myself I am my own worse judge but I have eyes and I see that I am still THICK . So have I lost my one good point. I realize I must seem like I am rambling but sometimes it hits hard and I wanna cry I will never afford the plastics I think that will make these feelings go away and I don't think that the last 20 lbs will do it either. Am I doomed to be extra wide ? why is it that I can be beside my SIL and she is the same size as I (she used to be petite but has gained in the last couple years) and I still feel like I am so much bigger? I don't think that I had this much of a self image problem when I was heavier. Will I ever see the real me or am I really seeing what I am and just gotta do something differant. I feel so unperportioned. My head and shoulders look like a stick yet my arms still sag a good 14 inches flat YUCK from there down I feel so oversized still. Does a person ever even out am I normal? Will I ever feel Normal ? I have slowed to only 2 - 3 pounds a month Which feels so slow You don't even feel it. It is almost like coming down off of an adrenaline rush and thinking what now. I wanna wear tank tops with spaghetti straps because it is hot and not worry about folks getting grossed out ya know. I am gonna stop now I could go on and on and on I am afraid I would out do the energizer bunny at this point so I won't bore You anymore I just plain don't feel normal yet. Any advice? I don't do the shrink thing I do the friends Family & people who have been there with advice thing , So Any advice ? Help? Thanks You ALL are the best. 287/172/160 then plastics Shell No I do Not regret surgery Would do it again!!!

Boy, I sure hope I'm not done. I've lost 150 lbs. since 10/20/04 and I have about 15-20 more to go. I hit my first plateau since I started my journey and I have the nerve to complain about it!! How crazy is that?? I can't complain really, although as most of us are finding out, the weight loss has slowed down considerably and we are having to use more than just our main tool (our pouch). I have to kick up the exercise a notch. How great it must feel to be done losing!! I can't wait till I get there. Best of luck to everyone!! Shelley Lap RNY 10/20/04 336/186/165ish

I know how difficult it can be. I have had to deal w/ changing relationships with my husband as well as with my friends. I congratulate you on your success so far and having the courage to do this on your own. It is amazing how we have all found the courage to make this life altering decission, and hopefully we are all better for making that decision. Good Luck and don't feel so alone whenever you need a lending ear this board is always here.

Hello to all my fellow weight loss friends... It has been awhile since my last post... Alot has been going on in my life that i have had a hard time with... I moved from CO to CA first of May and had to make a journey back to CO in June because my ex husband father of my two children died... He drank himself to death... I had hoped that with us moving to CA he would want to get sober and fight to win us back... but that never happened... To date I have lost 143 lbs... and look and feel better than I have in years... I only have 20 lbs to go til i hit my goal of 170 lbs... but lately i have been struggling... I have always been an emotional eater... and find myself returning to my old habits... I feel like i am eating all day long... I am constantly full all day... and im afraid of gaining weight... so far i am maintaining, but getting scared... im coping with the depression and having to help my kids ages 10 & 7 deal with losing their father... right now im not working and am home all day long... I find some days its hard for me to even get up and be functional... i lay around the house.... Im finding there are not as many support groups out here as there were in Denver... they are usually only once a month instead of once a week... and i dont want to gain weight... im so afraid... I guess i just need to pull myself together and think of my long term goal... but again, somedays its hard for me to even think of anything but our loss... If anyone has gone thru something similiar i would greatly appreciate hearing how you have dealt with this... if not, any advice is very welcome... Glad to see everyone is doing such a great job in their journey... keep up the good work... Leslie 333/190/170

This is Steve in lenoir NC MY WIFE LEFT ME FIVE YEARS AGO. I HAVE BEN ALL ALONE ON THIS LONG JURNEY AND AM GLAD THAT I HAVE NO ONE TO SUPORT ME IN MY JURNEY.SOME TIMES I GET LONLEY. BUT AT THE SAME TIME I HAVE NO ONE TO ANSER TO.I NO WHAT THAT I NEED TO DO AND I DO IT.I HAVE LOST 138 LBS IN 9 MONTHS AND FEEL A WHOLE LOT BETTER. IF I CAN GET TO 220LBS AND PASS A SLEEP STUDY. I CAN GET THIS THING OUT OF MY NECK.I HAVE FOUND THAT HEALTH MUST COME FIRST.WITH THAT ALL THAT WILL BE WILL COME. IF BEING ALONE MEANES MORE HEALTH THEN BEING ALONE MEANES LIFE. DEATH IS BEING PUT THROUH LIVING HELL.PLEASE DO NOT LET PEOPLE HURT YOUR MIND. BE STRONG STAND UP FOUR YOUR SEALPH. BEING HAPPY AND HEALTHY IS WHAT MATTERS. 417LBS START 404LBS 289LBS TODAY SHORT GOIL220LBS LONG TURM 180