regular posters?

Hello everyone. I haven't been on the boards for awhile either. I used to stay on hours at a time in the beginning. It was good reading your posts and seeing that I am not alone in my struggle. I had my surgery on October 23, 2003, starting at about 270. I got down to 185'ish, which was good for me. I was wearing size 12 and 14's comfortably and really had no desire to be a 7 or 9 ever again. I did well for years with few fluctuations. However, the last few months have felt like I have not had surgery at all. Talk about grazing. While if I eat a meal, I fill up fast. I have taken grazing to a new level. I was eating Hershey's symphony candies (chocolate, toffee and almonds) which is the only sweets I really like and back to my old demon of salty foods. I was taking a bag of UTZ Kettle cooked chips to bed and sitting there eating almost the whole thing. I was also finding that I could go to McD's or Checkers and eat a whole burger (not really the fries though) and a diet soda. Long story short, I hit the 200 mark that I promised I would never see again and got up to almost 212. I nearly died and thought I was a total failure. Seeing all of your posts lets me know that I am not alone. There is some good news. This Saturday is my 47th birthday and a couple of weeks ago I made up my mind to get rid of the extra pounds and get back down to 185. I have been eating well the last couple of weeks and want the scale to say anything but 200 on May 12. It can even say 199.5!!! and I will be happy. However, it is scary to find out that the weight does not just drop off like it did in the beginning and I am actually have to work at this. I am craving chips and bread like crazy. Glad I could come here to vent with people who actually understand my plight. The regular board is full of newbies that have little in common with me. Take care, stay the course and someone answer soon!!