My 1 year update ...a bit late (thought you might be intrested)

My 1 yr update....a bit late Well I suppose it's time for me to find some outstanding one year revelation to share with everyone The truth is My surgery was Sept 6th 2005 and here it is Sept 23 2006 and I still haven't hand an Epiphany. I started at somewhere around 488 lbs and I'm now down to between 255 and 265. I do a heck of a lot more in one day now then I probably did in a month pre-op. I went from a size 54 jeans that were to tight for me to even get over my thighs down to an 20/22 jeans,I'm sure without the Panni(hanging belly skin) that I would be in a smaller size. My tops went from a 6x/7x down to a size 18/20, and some of those are getting a bit big. I do believe that although the Psych eval may feel like a pain in the ass it IS the one most important test you will do pre op. You see if you have eating issues and use food as your addiction to hide behind(yeah I hear you , I didn't think I did either ) You need to get that under control before you go for surgery. Most people who don't have the food comfort connection any longer just find another addiction to go to,And let me tell you it sure sucks when you wake up one day and realize that you no longer have a comfort zone to hide in, I became depressed and ended up in an outpatient treatment for 5 days (If you read my profile this far you'll understand why) I didn't have the comfort of food to hide in, I had no comfort zone at all being 150 or so pounds less I no longer had the fat to hide behind or use for an excuse. Someone asked me was I happy being 488 lbs,and was surprised when I said Hell yeah!! Think about it, at 488 lbs I had an excuse not to go out in public and deal with rude ignorant people,I didn't have to go shopping when there were a lot of people around(fat people just don't fit in crouded stores),I didn't have to date and worry about being judged or left to be hurt,I didn't have to do much laundry because I had a few outfits and if i wasn't leaving the house much I lived in jammies. Did this surgery fix that? NO, No it didn't but I did end up in counseling and found out that all those things had nothing to do with wanting to be fat. What I really wanted was to avoid people and public situation,They call it Acrophobia. I'm learning ways to deal with that and some people think I do more because I'm losing weight, let them,I have learned not to worry about what others think. I knew there was NO WAY that I could join a gym so I started out by walking in my house or walking when I knew most people wouldn't be out , A year later I have a treadmill,stair stepper,stair climber,weight bench set,Free weights and stationary bike. You can't afford all that you say? Neither can I all of these things were gifted to me from people who wanted to see me reach my goals. People are not ALL evil, some are more then willing to help you out, all you have to do is let them know your willing to accept the help. There are a few things I'll ask you as a pre op to think about before you get this surgery. 1.Why are you doing this,No really think about it for one week and I bet you find a few different answers. 2.What are you going to use as a coping mechanism once the food is gone,what will be your new addiction. 3.What do you really expect to get out of this whole journey(list 5),and what if you don't get all those things? 4.Are you prepared for your whole world to change?Trust me it will,maybe for better, maybe for worse but it will definitely change. 5.Are you willing to be someones role model and answer a zillion questions (this wasn't even something I thought about pre op but yep it happened) I have gotten many e-mails and comments about how I inspire people and even had a couple saying that I was the reason they decided to do this surgery because I was such an inspiration. I never liked being on a pedistool but one of the benefits is now I make sure that I try to be someone worth looking up to because like it or not I am. 6.Can you take a compliment? Yes this is a real question...lol See when I first had surgery only my family and close friends would compliment me, they had to their family is how I would bru**** off,Then after the first 100 lbs strangers were giving me compliments and flirting,I'm still not used to that yet...but getting there. 7.Are you prepared for this to work? Again a real question I thought I was,I was sure I was,but as you can see in my profile I had a moment where I wanted to go back,I had no idea how to be thinner or how to fit in and do thinner things,I wanted my comfort zone back I wanted to be safe again. I'm learning new ways to be safe and comfortable now. 8.Do you have a strong marriage/relationship? Relationships change because of this , strong ones become stronger and weak ones break. Other people will start to treat you differently and yes it's because your now different even if you think your not going to change , you will,you'll find energy,and self esteem and energy you thought only 2 yr olds still had...lol Lucky for me I have only lost a few "friends" and the bond between my hubby and I grows stronger as I go. How would I sum up this past year....WOW I made it through the year. People say to me no I don't mean with everything that happened I mean with this surgery, yeah me too because this isn't like getting your gall bladder out you don't just do it and go on with your day, This surgery effects everyone and everything around you from the day you decide to get it onward. At times it will consume you, and just when you think you have a handle on it , the handle breaks. I knew for the first 8 months I could eat chicken no problem, lately chicken is not my friend, I knew I could not have carbs, well now that I work out so much I have to have carbs or I stall. I knew if I got down to a 22/24 I would be happy that this really worked, now I have a pair of 18's hanging on my treadmill reminding me that that is my new goal, and I saw this cute sweater it's a size 16/18 a year ago I woulda never considered it, now I'm thinking that will be my Christmas present to me.........lol Yes this can fail..if your not ready or prepared for it. Yes there could be complications, there are with any surgery,but how many surgeries give you a life back? I'm sorry if this seems kind of long to some of you but really how do you sum up a year in just a paragraph? And for all you who look up to me or are inspired by me, Thank you for reminding me when I feel like giving up that I am not just doing this for me anymore and I better keep my but in gear. (((((Hugs))))) 1Year post op and finally seeing who I am becoming Shel http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y146/meshelacraze/b4c.jpg and http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y146/meshelacraze/shortskirt.jpg

Hi Shelly You look amazing. Today is my first day on this website...I am 2 weeks post-op. I had my surgery on 9/13. My starting size was 22/24, and from 9/5 through today, I am down 24 lbs. I am obsessed with getting on and off the scale and can't wait until my 1 year anniversary. I was not at all hungry the first 2 weeks, but I am starting...Waiting patiently to have a scrambled egg! :O)