just sitting here

i am just sitting here drinking vodka and cranberry juice, which actually tastes pretty good, think about the past few months. I am wondering if my choices were right. I know all of you think it is right cuz we are doing so well. but what about the future........we will still be doing right.... don't get me wrong...I am happy with what I have lost but i get scared of course, i get discouraged, i get depressed, cuz I dont feel like i am skinnier............i feel like it is a dream.... I mean i get a different response from different people...And i know everyone feels this way.. I feel like maybe i shouldnt have done this.......but then i feel like i am crazy for thinking this way.......will i ever be the same again....and of course I fight with my hubby......... but i always have.... but if we seperate now will everyone say it is because of the weight loss... RIGHT? I don't know but i sit here and listen to my world around me and need to know what is right..

WWOOOWW, slow down here. You are what 5 months out and drinking vodka. HOW and cranberry juice? First of all, you need to know that I am praying for you and though I don't know you I feel compassion for you. I know we all get discouraged from time to time. Heck I even get scared. I looked in the mirror tonight and all I saw was big girl with lots of excess skin, it's scared me! But you have got to believe that this was the right choice. Things are going to get better, sure we all fight with our spouses, I do on a regular basis, but no matter what I married the nut and when I said to death do us part, I have to mean it. We have seeked counseling before and it and Jesus saved our marriage and his life. You are something special and you have done a great job, but girl you scare me with that drinking 5 months out. I would be so drunk I couldn't hold my head up I haven't drank since I got Saved 5 years ago. I don't feel skinner either, but for the first time in 10 years I went to parisian's saturday and bought a 3x shirt!! That to me was the best feeling ever other than weight less than my husband for the first time every!!! Please seek advice from a professional or maybe several professionals and know that I am praying for you and thinking about your situation, we all have them. Angie -135lbs

You seem depressed. I to have marraige problems. I had them way before this surgery. My husband has been in Texax for 6 weeks. I really miss him. He will be home tonight. We had time to think. I loved being alone. But I need my husband also. So we talked and want our marraige to work. My grandkids love him so much. I drink now the rum with 1/2 the calories. island breeze with lime. I think that is the name. I drink that with suger free ice tea. I do better with that than with the vodka. I drink once a week on sat. That is my night out. It is a new drink and not many clubs have that. We are all losing slow at this stage. You look great !!!! Your going to continue to lose weight. Just keep with the program. I excercise so much. I dont think I need any other surgerys. If I didnt excercise I would not be where I am. Just hang in ther Hugs Barb

I am not depressed...I was just a little drunk...I usually also drink once a week...but I am getting tired of vodka...I know we all fight..but some times I just can't take it.. I do get drunk quicker than before...But I used to drink beer..and now I can't ... I guess I shouldn't have been online when I was drinking oh well...I do feel better though.