Discouraged, need support

I'm over a month out, have lost 'only' 23 lbs and am feeling very discouraged. I know exercise would increase the weight loss but can't walk cuz i have plantar fasceitis (strain in foot muscle). I joined a gym but havent got my butt there to go swimming, and am sooooo tired of being fat & in pain!! I try to use other ppl here as inspiration but beat myself up when I dont 'measure up'. What I KNOW intellectually and what I FEEL emotionally are two very different things! I have tried and failed soooo many times at losing weight, now that this is going so slowly (it seems), I'm afraid of failing and/or sabotaging myself. Find myself wanting to snack, to eat sf stuff that I DONT need, etc. Just so unmotivated!! I sleep too much, don't take care of my house, hardly shower, don't go out unless I need to... On top of that, I need to go back to work and have NO idea what I want to do, or can do physically. I've been home since April, have totally taken advantage of it (& not in a good way) - could have accomplished so much more. Feeling like a failure in so many areas... where is the silver lining?? By the way, I'm already on an anti-depressant. Where do I go from here? I need your encouragement and support. Thanks

Melanie, Please don't think tht 23 lbs in one month isn't a milestone...IT IS!!! I lost 26 lbs in my first month and was a little disappointed, but had to remind myself that I had never lost 20 lbs in a month before...ever!!! As for the snacking....I know what you mean. I get bored and head into the kitchen...I am having to remind myself that I need to do housework or play w/ my kids or get out of the house when I get bored....or emotional. Just remember that you didn't put on all the weight in a month or two, it isn't going to come off that quickly no matter what you do. Since you are having other problems (i.e. not wanting to do anything, not showering, not going out) I would probaby go and see my dr that put me on the anti-depressants...you may need a stronger dose or to change what you are on. The surgery may effect you in ways that would effect you medications. I'll be thinking about you... ~~Emily Jones Montgomery, AL

Hi Melanie, Don't fret. I think our bodies as well as our minds go through SO much in these recent weeks post surgery. Your weight loss is great! Don't worry if it's fast or slow. When you're ready to work out, you will! (I hope). I'm a month out tomorrow and I've had a hard time getting my butt outside to walk. I've walked about 3-4 times a week, but I should be doing it 5-6 times. I find excuses not to do it, some real, some really made up. It's hard to change old habits. I'm feeling a bit "hemmed" in the house too. I think this is from trauma that our bodies endured and it's tough to snap back into things. My surgeon told me that I will run a gammut of emotions from glee, depression, anger, frustration, fear, etc. He looked at my husband as he said this and said "Watch out!"...and it has started. I've felt just kind of "down" the last few days. Can't really pin point why, I have no reason to feel down, I just am. It could be that we're not eating much and we're trying to adjust. I don't know. You'd think I'd be jumping up and down with excitement because I've lost weight already and the clothes are loose and I'm feeling better daily...but, I'm not. I've got to get to a support group meeting soon. Monday nights are tough sometimes for me, and (here's the excuse) I don't like driving an hour up to the meeting from where I live. That's where they are. We're getting the remenants of the hurricane today and it's windy and rainy, no walking today... My body is rebelling...I have sore shoulders and my hip went out. I've got to rest it today or it will get worse. I'm getting old! Just turned 42! Hang in there...I will if you will... Get yourself to a support group meeting or call your doc and see if there's a psych that you can talk to about this ok? I'm going to talk to my surgeon tomorrow about these feelings. Paula

(((MEL)))) I think that just admiting that something is wrong is a start. I imagine that making yourself get up everyday and facing your problems head on will start to give you a sense of accomplishment and when you get on the anti-depressants, that will help alot as well. I have my moments where I just don't have the patience that I used to and some days where I live very little energy, but I force myself to get up and do something, and that always makes me feel better. Beth

Melanie, I understand. BUT, in 4 weeks you have lost 23 lbs. That is an average of 5.75 lbs a week. THAT'S AWESOME!!!! I had my surgury on 9/13/05 and after 3 weeks I had my 1st plateau for 2 weeks. I am now 6 weeks out and I have lost "ONLY" 29 lbs (I am firmly planting my tongue in my cheek). It did BUM me out to plateau after 3 weeks, but I have never been able to lose 29 lbs so quickly before. I have saw where others have had similar issues. That just means we are part of the largest group of LOSER's out there. Some lose slower and others lose quicker, but we are losing. 23 lbs may seem like such a little amount of weight, but I want you to do yourself a little self check.... Are you ready? Go to the grocery store and find a 23 lb Turkey, Side of Beef or one heck of a Burrito. (Anything that adds up to 23 lbs I perfer using BUTTER!) Pick it up and walk around with it for a while. I bet you will soon agree that 23 lbs is A LOT OF WEIGHT. You lost it! You deserve the credit for using the tool the great Doctor gave you to lose the 23 lbs. Move when your body feels good. Get a couple of cans of vegetables out of the kitchen cabinet and lift them. They don't have to be heavy to work. Anything is better that nothing. You can do it! Don't weigh yourself everyday It will make you upset if you fluctuate you weight (Trust me I did). Do it no more than once a week (I mean weigh yourself). Use only your scale to compare each week. Scales will vary from one another. The doctor's might say one thing and yours might be different. Weigh yourself naked, directly after you wake up before eating or drinking. Above all...SMILE you are one of US! Welcome to being a LOSER too! Jerry