update on mom surgery

Well Its not good when I went back the surgeon said she never had pneumonia she has stage 4 Cancer metasasis recurrence (she had bc 5 years ago and had masectomy) distant, its in her lungs, liver, bones, cranial and spine. I am having such a hard time dealing with this because I want to be home with her. I just got back of 4 weeks and have to get back to work to pay the bills. I am so STRESSED OUT and not eating healthy hospital food is the worst thing ever!! Not to mention NC food is filled with grease and its good eating but not healthy for you. I don't know what to do because I am trying to find answers about this cancer and I just keep getting road blocks so I get even more frustrated. If anyone knows of this stage of cancer please either repost or email me with as much information as you can. She is doing radiation for 28 days right now and has had two treatments of chemo. Her hair has already started to fall out. They are trying to reduce the cancer in her spine or she will be paralized.

Hi Michelle, I'm so sorry about your Mom. Has she been having yearly MRI's and bone scans since her breast cancer? What took them so long to find a metastasis in such a late stage? In late, I'm sorry to say, that at stage four, there really isn't much they can do excpet to keep her on almost constant chemo and/or radiation to kill the cancer and keep it at bay. There won't be a cure at this point. Especially since it's spread to her liver and bones and head. It's mostly comfort measure from here on. I had a friend that had breast cancer and had a metastasis and kept it at bay for over 7 years, but was on almost constant chemo and it was a gruelling way of life. She just wanted to see her grandkids grow up a bit before she went. It was very costly and she was sick, a lot. But, her spread was only to the belly and bones at that point. She knew when it was time to stop and let God that over Try to have your mom keep a postitive attitude and she may live a lot longer with a good outlook. You're going to hit roadblocks because the medical profession really doesn't have much to say at this point. They also may be covering their tracks if they've missed something in the past years that caused this spread to be so far along. Especially if she's had her proper testing every year. Order copies of all of her records form all of the doctors and hosptials involved...for safe keeping in case you choose to seek the advise of a lawyer. Google her cancer and stage and where it's spread and I'm sure you'll find a lot of different forums. But, like I said (and I'm sorry to be so grim), once cancer has spread like this, there isn't much. I'm sorry that you have to be so far away from her. But, if you can get some more time off, I'd go and be with your mom now. It's important. My first husband died after a three year fight with colon cancer and when we found it, (he was 27) it was already in stage 3. They took out the tumor (which was the size of a plum), that means it had been growing from a tiny polyp to a tumor for over 10 years and he begged three or more doctors to scope him when it would have been a polyp cause his dad had just died from colon cancer and shrugged him off and told him it was "an old man's disease". Little did they know. Now, with more knowledge, they give you a colonscopy and snip out the little polyps and it prevents the cancer from even starting. He was just 32 when he died. I was a widow at 30. I know what a nasty thing cancer is, believe me. And I know the heartache losing someone we love is. I'll pray for your mom and for you and for the doctors, that they are given the knowledge to treat your mom with care and concern. Keep us posted. Paula