Your invited to...
.... my pity party!
I have been throwing myself the BEST PITY PARTY ever! I never knew I could throw a PITY PARTY quite this good.
Why can I not be content with my weight loss? Why do I still see myself at fat? Why do I think myself unworthy? Why do I think myself undesirable? Why do I think I'm unattractive? Why am I always starved for attention? WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY !?!?!?!Gurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
I saw someone (a professional) about this stuff last week but to be honest it didn't help at all. I don't think the woman gets it.... I don't understand it....
So I've turned to you my family..... WLS wise I'm a success I'm 5'10 and 145 pounds. I'm physically healthy and have had pretty much no complications.... and now this MENTAL thing...
ANYONE? ANYTHING? SOMETHING?
~Erin
Felling pretty daym sorry for herself.........
You have to set down and think about whats still missing, theres something you didn't accomplish to make you feel completed.
Just becouse statistics make ius a failure or sucsess does not mean our head gets it. Look back to b4 surgery , what were the hopes and dreams for now, what did you expect to see diferantly that you didn't get? Make peace with that and you'll feel better about the whole thing. Profesionals are like anyone else, some you click with and some you don't,I was seeing a councler for 3 yrs and getting no where,I quit going and when I went back they switched me to someone new,I have gotten more out of 6 months with this woman then I did 3 yrs with the other one.
Hugs
Shel
Hi Erin,
I'm sorry you're not yet content with your wonderful success. That's too bad.
The only thing I can say is that my sister was the very same way. She never saw herself as thin or beautiful (she was both). She now has a huge hanging skin problem and her new hubby of 3 years has yet to see her nude. I'm not trying to air her dirty laundry, just trying to say, there are alot of people out here that will always struggle with the insecurity of being "fat". You, like her, have everything going for you and yet you, like her, need constant confirmation that you're worthy. Well, You ARE beautiful, young lady! You have soooo much going for you now, you're whole life ahead of you. Aren't ya a little bit happy? I sure hope so. It's sad to see someone not "feel" the blessings in their life. See, I don't have advice, just comments that probably could've been skipped, but I wanted to congratulate you on your astonishing success!
By the way...I totally get the "mental" thing...I'm very, very bad at sticking with this new way of eatting and because of it, I'm a very, very slow loser. Do I WANT to be thin? You BET! Do I know what I'm doing to myself? Uh-huh. Do I know why I continually sabotage myself? Not really... I'm just a confused wls patient, who keeps plunking away, daily trying to fine tune things to make this work. I realize I need counseling too, but with no insurance now, it makes it hard, so I depend on our wonderful online family, too!
God bless ya,
Kelly
The only thing I can say is that my sister was the very same way. She never saw herself as thin or beautiful (she was both). She now has a huge hanging skin problem and her new hubby of 3 years has yet to see her nude. I'm not trying to air her dirty laundry, just trying to say, there are alot of people out here that will always struggle with the insecurity of being "fat". You, like her, have everything going for you and yet you, like her, need constant confirmation that you're worthy. Well, You ARE beautiful, young lady! You have soooo much going for you now, you're whole life ahead of you. Aren't ya a little bit happy? I sure hope so. It's sad to see someone not "feel" the blessings in their life. See, I don't have advice, just comments that probably could've been skipped, but I wanted to congratulate you on your astonishing success!
By the way...I totally get the "mental" thing...I'm very, very bad at sticking with this new way of eatting and because of it, I'm a very, very slow loser. Do I WANT to be thin? You BET! Do I know what I'm doing to myself? Uh-huh. Do I know why I continually sabotage myself? Not really... I'm just a confused wls patient, who keeps plunking away, daily trying to fine tune things to make this work. I realize I need counseling too, but with no insurance now, it makes it hard, so I depend on our wonderful online family, too!
God bless ya,
Kelly 
My counselor in Florida said it takes two years for our heads to catch up wtih our bodies. If the first counselor you saw doesnt "get it", then keep looking and find another counselor. One session is not enough to fix the mindset that's going on. If they seemed okay, try it for a few more sessions and see if it helps.
That said, I understand where you're coming from, and one thing I was journaling about this morning is that I don't have anyone in my life *****gularly says "You look nice today". With the whole PC thing at work, guys are afraid to 'notice', and none of my friends or family are really that fashion/body conscious. So I could run around feeling unattractive or I could look in the mirror and say "you look great today" to myself.
--BT
Hey I got an idea lets trade places..you can be me at 5"7 weighing 180 and stuck not being able to get to goal and I will be 5"10 and 145 in a heartbeat!!!! WOW you have done wonderful for yourself!!! Be happy with who you are and what you have done your awesome!!! Tell me what you did to make goal I need some inspiration and you are it!!! I do know I have issues about when Iwas a kid and being sexually abused and I think that might be why I sabatoge myself all the time and the fact that I didn't have food when I was kid so I Want it all NOW!!! well not now but I feel I can't do without it sometimes and I over indulge so maybe there is something in your past that you don't want to face or you haven't. I just found out about 3 years ago that I had actually been sexually abuse because I had put it in the back of my head and didn't tell anyone, now I have told everyone and I have dealt with alot of it but it still creeps back up on me and I just have to keep telling myself that I am ok. You are awesome and don't let anyone tell you otherwise!!! BE PROUD LOOK AT YOUR OLD PICTURES AND SEE WHERE YOU HAVE COME FROM!!! I am not going to join your pity party but I will join your inspiration party when you have it!!!!
Erin,
You and I have been pretty much neck and neck in this weighloss journey. I am also 5'10. I got the flu a couple of weeks ago and I got down to 134. I knew that after I felt better I would gain a few pounds back. Right now I am at 139 and I feel bad about gaining the weight. I know that sounds really stupid, but I have all the same feelings that you do. Everyone is telling me that I am too skinny and that I should gain some weight back, but I don't want to I want to keep losing. I am now in an A cup for my bra and I don't even feel like a women. I have to wear push up bra's that are too big to make me look like I have any kind of a chest. I have been seeing someone since before surgery, but since I have been sick I haven't gone. I son't really think anyone can understand what is going on in our heads-especially not in one visit-unless they have been there themselves. I just hope youknow that you have us and that we will help any way we can.
Christine
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