Did you miss me??

Hello friends, well a week ago Thursday we had this huge thunder and ligtening storm in my area (Northern Virginia) and of course we got zapped, lost power for awhile, the invisible fence was out (we have THREE big dogs -- ugh), our phone got zapped and wasn't fixed for over a week (now that was kinda of nice), but worse, our modem got zapped and we couldn't get a new one right away. So I was offline for awhile. I got on very briefly, but nothing for long. But that's fixed as of yesterday. I missed you all!! I know we all don't post alot, but we do have this bond that is so there. I feel I can talk to you about things that I might not express on other boards. Do you feel the same? Like if I want to eat more carbs, on other boards I'm afraid people will say 'yada yada yada', whereas I know you all will say 'yeah, been there done that' and not scold!! Well that's not my problem right now, but it has been on occasion. Here's my problem or strange thing now. Greg is gone this week to a Tai Chi camp so I'm alone. Well that is with 4 cats and 3 dogs. But human alone. And he has always traveled quite a bit with his job, etc., but this is the first time since my surgery. So here's what's weird. Usually whenever he went away it was for some reason, a big eating fest for me! Not that I didn't eat with Greg around but with him gone I even did better. Started planning what take out I would get, when I would go to DQ, just normal pig out. So yesterday when he left it was sort of a funny feeling. A feeling like I really needed, and wanted, to 'go' somewhere and eat, but totally not interested in doing it. I didn't, but I have to say it was frustrating because it had become my 'reward' for being alone. It sort of felt like a let down. I totally went through the whole proces --- okay, I'll go to the new Steak N Things, see what the stuff tastes like there. Then I thought, no, you'll find one thing you can eat, take two bites and be done. So I didn't. I guess this really reinforced to me how strong the mind is and how hard it is to overcome old habits, feelings. Also, how I always used to use food as comfort, and still think of it that way. Oh yeah friends, I am definitely not cured!! I have got to keep working on this -- but I am aware!! Have a nice holiday everyone. My computer is working now (obviously) after having our modem go out from the lightening storm, so hello - write me!! I'm going to be lonely!!! So if anyone is out there still reading this long and probably boring post, please respond cause I am going to start barking instead of talking soon!! Oh, and both my daughters (who live in San Diego anyway, and not close to me) are on vacation so I don't even have them to call!! I know there are you parents out there that probably think this would be heaven to spend the whole week completely alone, but it can be boring!! Although I think I'll go to the movies, do some shopping -- hmm, this is sounding better and better. I think I'll also try to catch up on all the posts that I missed!! love donna

Hi Donna Nice to have you back. We were out of power last night for a while but nothing like you had... Sandy

Hi girlfriend - thank you! Yeah, that power off business is not fun!! Have a nice 4th, Sandy, love donna

Hi Donna, You poor thing. Power out, computer down, hubby gone, gosh! You've had it all kick ya in the seat haven't ya? LOL I can TOTALLY relate to the food issues and I still struggle DAILY to find sanity with this new life. I could probably write a book on all the info I have learned over the years about healthy eatting, etc. but do I follow it...noooooo. Crazy! Yep, surgery didn't change my emotions. Rewarding myself with food is a hard habit to break, that's for sure. I grew up in a close, loving, over-weight family and we all used every excuse to eat, holidays, celebrations, Friday night videos, whatEVER, ya know? So, this is the reason I am losing so slowly although I am trying to stay with sparkpeople.com and track my caloric intake more regularly now and it seems so help. At least it makes me more accountable. I also hear ya about the kids. I know it has to be hard! Mine are 19, 18 (almost) and 15 and I DREAD the day they move out. They are SO much my life, it's terrible.lol I have been trying to find more in common with my husband, which is hard. I love him, but we are opposites. I feel like once the kiddos are gone, what then? Wow. Too much to think about this early in the morning. Anyway, I yacked enough. You try and enjoy yourself this week. We'll try and keep ya company. Hugs, Kelly

Hi Kelly, thanks for the message. Yeah, head games are not over!! I think alot of it is just a disruption in my usual schedule, and that always throws me for a loop. Also, sort of a 'what do I do now' feeling!! And of course eating was always what would fill my time. That is so strange how eating was such a big part of my life. I remember once at a WW meeting one of the leaders said something about how we can realloy talk ourselves into having a holiday or celebration almost every day if we let ourselves. And I thought of that when I read you post about Friday night videos!! Also like going to a movie - it's never about the movie, but what treats we can get!! yes, the kids are so much a part of your life right now, and it's smart to try to get that common something going on with your hubby now. I worry about that with one of my daughters, she has six kids and she is so busy with her children, I worry she neglects her husband. One thing they do that I think is important is to have a date night once a week with just the two of them. You might do something like that! Could be fun. I am going to check our sparkpeople. I 've never heard of that website, is it like fitday? I do that one. take care, and happy 4th to you! love donna

Hey Jan - oh I feel guilty now cause I know you all had it so much worse than us!! But it was a bad storm. I laughed so hard when I read about traveling for work - that was so me!! I would love to get a bag (and here I mean a tote bag!!) and fill it with trail mix, chips, anything that I usually didn't have (at least in public). And yeah the cinnabuns were a must for a plane ride!! I guess we're more alike than we think!! So are you getting excited for your 'trip'!! I envy you. I am going to do it, but I'm waiting till I lose more. Hopefully I will, although it is slow! love donna

welcome back Donna! Tonya King 275/183/160

Hi Tonya, thanks for the welcome back!! love donna

Hey Donna I hear yah. You sound just like me. My family is leaving sat for possibly up to two weeks. My husband says he doesnt think he can be away that long but I think he probably will once he gets home to his family. I have to work and couldnt get the time off. Ive started planning walking and workouts instead of eating triops. Although I probably will eat out as its cheaper sometimes. I did have my husband grill up extra chicken the other night and i threw it in the freezer to be able to pull out and chop up and put on a salad or fix with a baked potato. Something ready on hand so i dont grab something bad. So email away your husband will probably be back before mine leaves lol and ill be here posting alone. Tammy O

Hey tammy, I don't know where the week went, and I didn't get emails on my email at home so I didn't get your message. I've decided anything out of routine is hard to handle!! It's been a nice week though. I have just slugged around, saw a movie, having lunch with some friends today, just relaxing. Didn't have to worry about cooking for anyone!! love donna