Why are people so mean?

I was so excited today, I actually got into a size 10 pants. WOOOHOO. Anyway I decided to go into Express and look around. It was just nice knowing that I could finally fit my fat ass into clothes that they sell there. Anyway to make a long story short a girl that I went to High School with works there. I have seen her since I have gained all the weight and she knows that I had this surgery. All she had to say to me was that she knows someone who gained most of their weight back. She couldn't say that I look good or congratulations. She had to bring me down, and it really pissed me off. It seems to me the more weight that I lose the more negative people are becoming. As far as I am concerned if you have nothing nice to say"KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT"! Just wondering if anyone else is having the same problem or not and I also really needed to vent. Christine

Aww Christine, First, congratulations on getting into a size 10, my GOSH!! I have a 15 yr. old daughter who wears 11's at 5'4 & 138# and looks itty-bitty to me, so I can NEVER imagine being so tiny! In my mind, I'll be happy at a size 12 or 14 because my brain can't wrap itself around being anything but large. I'm happy for ya though!! How ignorant can some people be? Your classmate sounds like a real sweet gal! NOT!! Yep, I've had one or two put a negative spin on this surgery, saying be real careful or you'll gain it all back plus some...Too bad people can't just say a compliment and be done with it. Know what though, truthfully? My sister had gotten down from 380# to 195# (her lowest) since her surgery in 2000 and now, she is slowly creeping back up and is 235#. It's due to mindless snacking to be sure and it's so sad. I've learned alot from her experience, some good habits, alot of bad. I certainly don't want to gain back my weight, that's for sure!! I need to lose MUCH more. Anyway, vent away, hon. That's what we're here for. Hugs, Kel

Kelly, You are absolutley right. I have to worry about gaining weight every day and I don't really need people to remind me. I have heard that some people lose too much weight and then gain some of it back, I have even heard of people who gained it all back and more. But they are not you or me, and we did not work this hard to just gain it all back. Christine

I can relate!! I have run into the same kind of remark,,,and it makes me mad everytime. But Im learning that its the people that are envious of our success,,and dont want to believe that we will really makeit work. It just makes me more determined to show em!! Congrats on the size 10's!!! That is soooo awesome! Im into 14's and 16's and to me thats a miracle. i had a wow moment today when I went to my inlaws,,,the siterinlaws,,all three of em,,have always been thin when I was wearing my 26's. Today,,I was the thinnest!! WOOHOO!!! They were blown away! Made it all worth it!! HEHE Cant wait til the family reunion in June!!!

Betsy, That is a great WOW moment. Just think of what size you will be in June. Maybe some of them won't even recognize you. Mine wouldn't say anything even if she did notice. Their whole family is that way. I think you are right and I am going to use this as a positive and help make myself more determined. Christine

Bingo. I have a sister in law the same way !!!!!!!!!!!!! Saying the skin sags and gastric bypass iss not 100 percent. and I could gain all my weight back !!!!!!!!!!! I took her in the bathroom showed her my stomach. I thought to myself. Check this out you BIT-- you know what im saying. Eat your heart out. She was so quite all night. acted so jealous. People are jealous Take Care Hugs Barb

Barb, You crack me up. Wish I could be that way, there are a whole lot of people I would show a thing or two. Oh well I am working on that while I am getting thinner. Hugs to you 2 Christine

People can be rude and they don't understand what we go through. I am so afraid of gaining this weight back also, so they don't know how much we beat ourselves up about being afraid. We don't need them telling us something we know already that we have to struggle with. Just try to be happy with the way you are and try to stay focus on eating healthy then we don't have to worry about gaining it back. Easier said than done.

Michelle, It is good to know that I am not alone. I worry I should be losing more weight than I have or that I will gain it back- the list goes on and on. I guess I am just a worrier. You are right as long as I do what I am supposed to they can say whatever they want. Christine

Hi Christine, scxxw them!! You go girl!! A size 10 - zoowhew!! That is totally awesome. I have only lost one 'friend' (I think I've lost her) because of my surgery. And I am sorry about that, but oh well. I don't know what to say when she keeps questionning me about what I eat, sagging skin, and on and on. It's just not fun to be with her anymore. Oh, and she weighs 235 so I know what the problem is! I used to hate people who were successful at losing weight too. I was jealous!! And so is your high school twit friend! love donna