18 months ago....

18 months ago, I was awake..and nervous. The next day was my big day...my rebirth. 18 months ago, I weighed 344 lbs and wore a size 26/28/3-4xL. 18 months ago, I was a diabetic, suffered with joint pain in both knees, had asthma, chronic bronchitis, sleep apnea, PCOS, and unsual liver functions. 18 months ago, I had already had a hysterectomy, gall bladder removed, uretha sling put in (for stress incontinence)...all due mainly to my weight. Today, I contemplate all that has occured since September 17th, 2004. I have lost 164 lbs. I now wear a size 10-14 (depends on style/cut). Mediums are starting to get loose on me. Today, my ailements? I have an underactive thyroid and my sugar drops too LOW. One little pill takes care of one and eating 3 snacks along with my 3 meals a day takes care of the other. Today, I've had a few more surgeries and (ALOT) more endo's than I had planned...but it was well worth it. Tomorrow.....I continue on my path to loose that last 40 lbs. I have never been an 'ideal' BMI...but I WILL be. My all time favorite saying is "To thine own-self, be true". When I had my RNY, I was true to myself for the first time in a very long time. My RNY helped me find me. I was hidden away in all that fat so much that even I had trouble seeing through to the real me. I am still finding out who that person is. What I know of 'me' though I am beginning to like alot! People who have known me awhile are still adjusting to 'me' though. I'm not the jolly fat girl I once was. Why is it that obese people has such a need to be liked by everyone that we become class clowns? That's a rhetorical question. I know for me it was because I couldn't imagine someone liking me for me so I tried to be funny instead. Besides, if I made a joke about me being fat, maybe it would put others more at ease. Hurt less if I said it instead of just 'knowing' that was what they were thinking. You all know what I mean. Anyway....here I am at my pc tonight just thinking about these past 18 months and all the changes. I just think 'Whew girl! You did it!!' LOL! Just had to share... Sherri