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Topic: RE: My sister told me I look old...
Hi Debbi,
Yes we are more alike than we thought! My sisters and brother always called me names growing up. And my own mother did too. She always told me to get off my fat ass and do something. "Nice mom, thanks, I appreciate that!" 
They really aren't bad people. They just don't know how to compliment. We were raised by parents who never told us they loved us or gave us any praise. So we learned not to be free with the compliments. I am totally different now. And my parents, except for that comment from my mother, are usually very supportive of me and DO tell me they love me...now... I have learned to rely on my husband and my kids for support. My in-laws are very supportive of me as well. Not to mention my family here! 
Lori
They really aren't bad people. They just don't know how to compliment. We were raised by parents who never told us they loved us or gave us any praise. So we learned not to be free with the compliments. I am totally different now. And my parents, except for that comment from my mother, are usually very supportive of me and DO tell me they love me...now... I have learned to rely on my husband and my kids for support. My in-laws are very supportive of me as well. Not to mention my family here!
Lori Topic: RE: My sister told me I look old...
Hey Sherry,
I was never obese in school either. I was overweight the first two years of HS but then lost 40lbs over the summer and was about 135 junior and senior year. But my sister was always still smaller. They have no idea what it was like for me to weigh 281lbs. They are both right around 200lbs. They don't know how badly my body felt. If they did, they wouldn't have a negative thing to say about me.
I HATE gossipy, negative people. There are way too many of them around me, including my once best friend from HS. I can't even stand to be around her anymore. All she can do is tell me how much of a ***** I am for getting skinny. She is about 275 lbs and very negative and downright mean at times. And she has no self-esteem whatsoever. I have offered to help her get approved for surgery but she wants no part of it. I can't win for losing... so to speak! 
Thanks again for the support. I, too, consider you a friend. Thanks for being there for me and everyone else. That means alot.
Lori
Thanks again for the support. I, too, consider you a friend. Thanks for being there for me and everyone else. That means alot.
Lori Topic: RE: My sister told me I look old...
Thank you Teresa. And thanks for being here! All of you! I knew I could come here for the support I need. Hopefully they will come around eventually and except me for who I am. And who I have become. I am still the same person on the inside thank goodness. THAT won't change!
Lori
Lori Topic: RE: Guess what???
Thanks Debbie! You are almost there too!!! Thanks for the reply on my sisters. They don't really cut me down persay but they do make snide remarks. I don't even think they realize they are doing it because they do it soooo much with everyone.
Lori
Lori 
Topic: RE: My sister told me I look old...
Hey Lori,
We are more alike than I thought! I too have a sister who has always been the thinnest. I have always been the "heavyie" sister, although in high school it was due to I was very athletic, but still, I have always been bigger and she always called me fatty or hippo. NOW, we are the same size. She does not cut me down like your family does to you, but she also HATES that I have been so successful. granted, she was there when I had my surgery and even helped me pay for it, but I do not think she realized I would be so successful or that she would gain so quickly.She is still 10 pounds lighter, but seeing as how our whole lives she has been skinny, it kills her that we almost wear the same size and when I try to help her, without preaching, she gets really pissy. it was funny when she would say something about my weight to me, but when I say something to her, you would think I committed the worst crime against her. At my youngest brother's wedding in March, my other brother commented on how great I look and how huge she has gotten and I felt so bad for her. Thank god she wasn;t there to hear it, but it made me realize what my family must have been saying about me behind my back.
Families, we don't shoose them ,they don't choose us but we have to make the best of it! But your "Family" here cares about you just the way you are!!
Hang in there and rememebr that you are right, it's all out of jealousy and you definitely gave them something to be jealous of!!!
Debbi
Topic: RE: Guess what???
Lori, You've done Great!!!
you should be proud of yourself.... have some fun celebrating joining Century Club!!!
WTG, Lori!!!
hugs, Rita
255/175/160
Topic: RE: Guess what???
I am so proud of you, my surgery twin! You are one of my main motivators on this board and I am thrilled for you! I hope to soon join you in that very elite club!
Keep up the GREAT work, both with your weight AND in keeping the rest of us motivated!
Debbi
289/199/185 surgeons goal/165 my goal
Topic: RE: My sister told me I look old...
Family!! I can't win with mine either. I am the oldest as well and have a brother that is 10 months younger. He is the favorite in my family and everyone knows it. We laugh about it, but it still hurts a little.
I grew up around boys. I have two sons and five nephews. I can't give you a lot of advice on sisters. You are beautiful and have a great personality. You and I both know that there are some jealousy issues going on here. I have not always been big. In high school and college, I was tall with long, blonde hair and 36-26-36 measurements. I did not flaunt myself either, but I got a lot of attention from the opposite sex. I was uncomfortable with it then and I am uncomfortable with it now that men are beginning to look my way again. Enjoy it for what it's worth. You know who you are inside, Lori. You don't need your sisters, other big women or even your mother to define that for you. I have never met you, but I consider you a friend.
As far as those that gossip and always seem to put other people down...
I have a huge problem with that. Honestly, there a women that absolutely do not have a thing to say unless they are putting someone else down. I have a no nonsense type of personality. I love to cut up and have fun, but when people act that way it clearly states that they have no self-esteem. One thing that I have learned from being obese is who I really am and what I stand for. It is unfortunate that women try to hurt one another to serve their own ego agenda.
LOL,
Sherry
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