Reflections at 8 months Post-op

4/28/06 - 226.2/144(-82.2) (8 months/35 wks). The work in this process has definitely begun. Exercise is no longer a fear but something I am starting to enjoy. While the scale is not moving much at all, I know the inches are dropping by the fit of my clothes. I am however becoming very critical of myself in the mirror and starting to see every flaw and imperfection. Something I didn't allow myself to see 82 lbs ago. When does the self-hate stop. Does it ever stop? Started internet dating...scared to share my secret (WLS), the scar and me. When is the time right? Don't know if I can achieve a healthy intimate relationship. Losing 3 lbs per month is driving me crazy. A loss is a loss and I am grateful. Once again, my eating is not perfect. The very things I should not eat go down the easiest and don't make me sick. I get sick a few times per month. It is because of eating too fast and/or not chewing enough. I live alone and for some reason cannot sit down at the table to eat. I often find myself standing in the kitchen. I am desperate to reach my goal of (-20) more lbs. It is something I could never do before and is just something that has to happen. In conclusion, I could not have gotten this far without my OH friends and this website. What an amazing group and website. No-one understands like all of you. Thank you and HUGS to all, Pat