What to tell my son????

Does anyone have advise on how to tell my 8yo son that I am going to have surgery? He is very compassionate and will want to take care of me. It is not his job to take care of me, but I don't know how to tell him about this surgery and what is going to happen after the surgery. The change in eating habits, the change in routine, etc. How have other people handled it?

Hi, My son is only 5 1/2 but quite perceptive and intelligent. I decided to keep things simple and age appropriate in my explanation and didn't get into the food so much. I drove him past the hospital to show him where I'd be. I explained to him I'd be having an operation on my stomach. I've changed my eating habits already so he knows that some things are simply off limits for me. I know it will be tough on him to have me gone for a few days but I really would like to keep things as normal as possible for him so he's not afraid. I guess you could just give your son a little info at a time rather than overwhelm him with the entire post op life discussion. It would be a lot for a kid to take in at once and he may worry. Tell him about how you won't be able to eat for a while when you come home. That should be enough for now and keep it open for questions. Hope this helped if even a little bit Take care and good luck, JP

I have a 4 year old daughter and was struggling what to tell her as she is my constant shadow. I was talking to my teenage son about my surgery Friday and she overheard us I guess because she walked into the room and asked,"Are you having surgery?" I said yes, she said when and who will watch me (My Aunt) and she was like okay. She has brought it up a few more times today asking why am I having surgery but I have focused on one the fact that of her favorite Aunt's is coming. I have also gotten a few little things to help take her mind off of me being gone. A DVD and some coloring books etc...just to keep her more occupied with the things than the fact I am gone. Anyway good luck on your journey! Kelli

I have 3 girls. 12 year old twins and an 11 year old. I have been very honest with them throughout this process. They are very understanding and supportive. I think with your 8 yr old you could start by saying how much you love him and how important he is. Then continue on by telling him that you are going into the hospital to have a procedure done that is going to make you so much more healthier and happier. Tell him in order to do this, he is going to see you go through some changes with your eating and lifestyle. But reassure him that the changes he's going to see are wonderful changes which will lead you to long life of health. Let him know it's a process and soon enough, he will start noticing that the 2 of you will be doing so much more together. I've really focused alot on that with my girls. We've made alot of plans for next summer and they're so excited. Ultimately, you know your son and how he will react. Try not to overload him with too many details that he will not understand. Good Luck with however way you decide to go about talking to him about it. Take Care Tammy

Thank you all very much. I think you are right. I will keep it very simple and let him process it at his own pace. He will ask questions as he processes. They say kids don't ask questions if they are not ready for an answer. As long as you keep the answer's simple.

I have two sons - 7 & 4. I told them mommy was having surgery on her belly. I did not tell them it was to lose weight. Had surgery tuesday and home the next day. Every once in a while I ask my 7 yr. old to get me something, like a tissue or to fill my water up. This makes him feel important. Best of luck with you surgery. Barbara M