I've progressed to the emotional part

I am an emotional reck! I can't help but think of what may happen, not only the good but the bad stuff to. I've been thinking about my living will... I've decided I want to write one. I've also been trying to decide if I want to write my hubby a letter. And damn if every time I start to think about it, I get tears in my eyes. UGH! I hope this stage passes before surgery. I still have 3 weeks to wait. I have started my list of things I want to do before surgery. Mainly really cleaning the house and making sure dishes and things we wouldn't use are put away. Guess I'm trying to keep my mind off things! Anyone else having this problem??? Shawna

Hey shawna! Mine is aug 23. Im not quite as bad as you!!! But your date is sooner to!!! I think you will do just fine and is so normal to feel the way you feel. I know i will feel the same when my date gets closer. But i think of all the weight im gonna loose and how much better im gonna feel. good luck to you! and remember you have alot of caring friends here!!!!!!!!! sheree

Hi Shawna, My surgery is scheduled for August 23. I'm just plain anxious to get on with it. I certainly understand your ambivalence. I'm trying not to think about the things that can go wrong. My doctors will just be getting back from vacation--I hope they are rested and ready to go when they get back. I'm scheduled on the second day after they return, so I'm hoping they get back into their groove by the time they get to me. I hope you can get distracted during the time till your surgery so you can relax. I'm hoping the same thing for myself as I wait. I'll remember you in my prayers. I wish you serenity!!! Sheryl

Hi Shawna! You're where I was about 3 weeks ago...already have my attorney drafting a will and a living will! Everyone should always be prepared, surgery or no surgery. And I also went through the period of writing letters to the important people in my life...I thought I was the only one that went through this!!! Guess that's why forums such as these are so important...just goes to show you that you are not alone. And about 2 weeks ago, I went through all the stuff in my house, sort of a spring cleaning, so in case something happened, my family wouldn't have a lot of things to go through and throw out. Amazing how the mind works, huh?! But that was prior to me hopping onto this site more often, reading other people's posts, hearing about their progress, and seeing before/after pics (you MUST go and check those out...we'll be wearing bikinis next year!). I have made a total turnaround, and am happy to say that the whole "thinking about my own mortality phase" is over. Now I can't wait until 8/29...wi**** was tomorrow! Just think of all the great things you can look forward to...a healthy and happy life, and a longer one too!!! I wish you the very best of luck with your surgery, and please continue to reach out when you're in need of support...that's why we're all here!!! Take care! Wendy

My date is Aug. 9th and all I can say is hang in there. It comes in waves and it comes in stages. Just remember how strong you are. You went out there and decided on something that isn't easy, but will improve your life. If your strong enough to do that Shawna, you can do anything!!! I will keep you in my thoughts, good luck!!! ---Tameka

I am an emotional wreck and was begining to think I was going I have been up and down all week but real bad today. I was sitting on the couch just sobbing away so I decided to come on the boards, I'm glad I did. It somehow gives comfort to know I'm not alone with these feelings. I'm not sure why today is so bad. I had my appt with the pulmonary doc and he said all of my test were great. My only problem is the weight. He could not believe my lab results. I should be jumping for joy. O.k here I go again with the boohoos. Thanks for listening and for your post. Jolene

Shawna, Okay, you posted the post I was going to post! I am feeling the exact same way down to cleaning the house like a mad woman. My surgery is August 5th and I went for my pre-op yesterday. I have been a hermit, staying at home, avoiding calls and several times hubby has come home and I have not taken a shower! That is sooooo not me. I had a girls night out on Monday and while it was fun, I did not want to be there. I have been in tears more than once thinking about the what ifs? and I guess this is something all or most pre-ops go through. It helps knowing I am not alone. Take Care, Kelli

My date is next Tues., Aug 2nd and I'm a ball of nerves. I keep thinking about my 2 small boys. I've thought about writing them a note each just in case something does happen. God forbid! Geez, I hate thinking like that but what if something does happen and I didn't let them know how I feel because right now they are too young to understand but if I write them something they can read when they are old enough to understand it's worth it. Am I just crazy? My husband gets mad at me for thinking that way but how can you not think that way? But I am very excited on the other hand and I do see the before/after pics and they are very encouraging. I just keep telling myself that at first it won't seem like it's worth it but in the long run, I will have a better quality of life with my sons and husband and it will be totally worth it. Right? Sorry, I was just venting. Thanks for listening. Good luck to you Shawna! Leigh

Thank god I am not alone in feeling this way!!! Thank you all! SHawna