I am so depressed. I hate holidays.

Hi everyone. I wonder if anyone feels the same way? Holidays & Depression? Usually when I work out I feel better- but this month I got really low- feel low- emotionally and physically, but beyond the tired I usually feel, I'm depressed because I feel so lonely. And I don't want to cry about it. This is the part I hate about being single. Plus I can't tell if this is after TOM PMS. And I don't want to resort to feeling sorry for myself and Im not stuffing myself to fill the void. I took off a 4 day weekend thinking I need the time off ( I do) and that I could see my family. My mom isn't coming until later in the week. My son is working the next 5 days. I have a date with this guy I met last week at a dance club. He is 36, @5-10, attractive, works out, name is John. He keeps telling me he keeps telling me what he wants to do with me and to me. My girlfirend chastized me for even dating a guy so much younger (shes 36). Normally I should be happy that this guy is interested and pursuing me, after I stopped talking to him.Its kind of funny- because you get used to men not being interested, so when they are, you don't know what to think. Not rushing into anything- but at the same time- my hormones have been hopping like crazy. Also I think that when my son was younger- it was easier to throw myself into what he was doing- school- sports etc, and submerge and hide myself away. Eat and hide away, submerging more and more. You know what I mean? And its easy to fall back to that- not by volume of food- but out of habit.This really is a lot to deal with - and I refuse to allow sabotage of all my hard work. Plus my son took new pictures of me. While they are not bad- I still feel "lost" because I am still like 60lbs from goal. So that depressed me too. I am 15lbs from Onderland and Depressed. its a Holiday weekend. And I just feel alone and everyone else has plans. I hate feeling this bad. Donna

Donna, Wish I could say something to make you feel better, but don't know what that would be. Summer holidays don't bother me. When I get to feeling blue about things though, I try to stay busy. I take the dogs for walks, or I work on sewing, quilting or cross-stitch, or go to the beach. I am married, so I don't have that "by myself" problem. As for feeling lost, you are doing great! You may be 60 pounds from goal, but look how far you have come. How long did it take to put on all that weight. You really can't expect it to be gone overnight. Also, if you are at all like me, 210 or 215, you are probably a lot smaller now than you were when you were gaining and at this weight (it is the extra skin here and there that keeps our weight up above where we could be -- if I had PS today, I would probably be 20 pounds lighter than I am!). You are getting there. Don't get discouraged. Eileen 337/209/160ish? Go out and do something fun with friends. Go to a movie, or shopping (some great sales coming up!). Try to relax and enjoy the days.

Thank You! See my posted response below.

Hi Donna, Sorry to hear you're feeling down. As you know, I didn't work out alot in June either & I really felt the stress of LIFE creeping up on me. I'm gonna get back on the wagon this month. Today I went hiking...it was fun. You look amazing, you're in the smallest size you've been in in years....you have a date with a good looking man...WOOO HOOOO for you... Get that chin up girl. You're doing wonderful. Look where you were this time last year.... I've had to keep reminding myself of this over & over again as I've only lost 2 1/2 lbs since the beginning of May. But.........I feel & look 100% better than this time last year. I'm wearing a 14-16 pants & Medium tops.... Remember to CELEBRATE YOUR SUCCESS girl.... YOU deserve it.... Relax during these 4 days off.... Do "me" stuff.... That's always a treat. Keep posting...we're here for you... Tammy

Thank You! See my posted response below

Hey Donna, I feel the same at times as you are now. I have been stuck and regain that 2 to 3 pounds over and over again these past 2 months. I got down below 200 and today on my 11 month post-op anniversary I weighed in at 202. Now I could get depressed (and to be honest, I am), but I'm going to look at my past journal and see what I've been doing to sobotage myself. I too am single and these days it is even harder to be alone then ever. I keep thinking that if I look so different then last year, why hasn't someone asked me on a date? I don't know the answer to that one. So even though I'm not the same women I was 11 months ago on the outside, I feel like I am on the inside. That goes for the good parts and the bad parts of what makes me, me. Ya know what I mean. So, I believe we all have this journey to make inside and out. Maybe during this 4 day break you can begin to work on the inside stuff like me. Hope you get out of the dumps (emotional ones) and that I will too! I should be excited today because I am closing on a house for the first time in my life. However, getting on that scale today just didn't help to put me in a good place. Hope all gets brighter for us all! Lori 293/202/135

Eileen, Tammi & Lori : Thanks bunches for making the time for me. I did not get back to this until today. Obviously I got passed the holiday. It was also a remembrance of my Dad's passing July3, 22yrs ago. I've had so much stuff happen to me on July4 holidays. I did go home and felt more depressed and I did not stuff myself. I distracted myself and noticed I had to clean my kitchen floor. Then I noticed my bathroom, so I did that. Then I wanted to shower- did that. ANd before I knew it- I hopped into bed - got up Saturday and headed straight for my support meeting. It was one of the best meetings- I brought up this same issue and asked how others dealt with it. Seems others had the same issue and was glad I brought it up- I dont think they would have talked about it..AND I got to purge how I felt- so that was good- AND the social worker told me this was a milestone and a growth point- because I acknowledged what was wrong- didnt try to fix it with food- and even though I felt bad and crappy, I didnt cave in to bad behavior and moved forward with positive growth. Believe me, I know how to eat bad- we all do. I just didn't want to feel sorry for myself. I also think its because my birthday is coming up next weekend- and Im going to be 50. 30 & 40 was good- but this is a big number. I have new pictures. I tried changing my messageboard pic- but it hasnt worked. It worked only on the main board.I have new pictures of me in my photosite album if you want to see them: http://www.ny.babe.photosite.com My date with John wasnt great.He sponged off me for an expensive lunch and was very selfish with his attitude.Its too bad because we did connect and had some fun, but he is a selfish guy and was ignorant and not open to things I wanted to do. But even that crap didnt drive me to stuffing my face, even though I was so upset, I had my son call me on my cell and have me come home. I just wanted to tell you I got passed it (barely ) but with your help, I feel like you all gave me big hugs, and I need lots of those. Thank you for helping me and understanding me . And most of all- being there for me. I love ya all. Hugs Donna

This is the correct link: http://nybabe.photosite.com/

Hey Donna, So glad to hear you made it through the 4th ok. We're always here for a ((((HUG)))) whenever you need one. Your pictures are fantastic You look WONDERFUL.... Forget that John guy, you need someone to treat you like the Queen that you are......... Wow 50th Birthday hugh??? Congratulations.... CELEBRATE, CELEBRATE, CELEBRATE...... you're probably WAYYYYYY healthier at 50 than you were at 40. Stick with us.... we'll all celebrate together...hahahahaha Have a great day ((((HUGS)))) & Tammy

Tammi! thank you thank you and Thank you! Hold your breath on the 16th - my birthday..Im throwing a BBQ party the following day and invited most of my WLS support group..now I have to worry about chairs- LOL U know I wont have to worry about how MUCH food to serve. LOL. yeah right! LOL Thanks.. (((hugs))) Donna