Secret life...

Wow, 2 posts in one day is probably a record for me... just wanting to talk I guess. So I was wondering if anyone else has kept their WLS a secret from most of their friends/family like I have. It's funny because I'm not really that private of a person, I gab like crazy about things, but with this, I'm still pretty secretive. There are a select few people who know about my surgery... like my mom, my in-laws, my hubby, and my closest friends. My dad, my siblings, and the majority of my friends still have NO IDEA. They all think I've been dieting and exercising like crazy (which I have, also). My sister was here over the weekend and her hubby, who's definitely morbidly obese was talking about WLS b/c his buddy's wife had it and has lost 120 lbs. and is looking awesome. I told him I knew people who had done it and the results were amazing and they'd never change their choice for ANYTHING in the world. But then he and my sister started talking S*IT about the "LOSERS" who choose to have WLS and how it's the easy way out. I quickly changed topics before I got too upset, especially since I would never want them to know about my surgery. HA! "The EASY way out"... That's funny. It certainly didn't feel so "EASY" being wheeled into the surgery room, not knowing whether or not I'd make it thru the surgery and ever see my baby again. It wasn't "EASY" drinking liquids for weeks while the people around me were eating everything normal... it wasn't "EASY" walking around with a drain tube sticking out of my side, or walking around period for that matter. It wasn't "EASY" the following months dealing with changing EVERYTHING in my life. In fact, there's not been anything "EASY" about it. The "EASY way out" is to continue stuffing your face and gaining more and more weight every year until eventually you die. That's the "EASY way out"... doing NOTHING to change your situation. I hope someday people's views of the surgery really do change. I know every year it seems to get more acceptable as a form of weightloss. I know the people I've told have all been very supportive (to my face), and I'm sure if I had told my sister and her hubby, they would have been too, to my face at least... then behind my back would've talked smack about me, just like his buddy's wife. It's funny because I've always been so self-conscious, and never wanted anyone to know I was obese (as though they couldn't tell by looking at me). I was in denial of my weight, and hoped that those around me were too. Last month, my surgeon (THE ABSOLUTE GOD THAT HE IS) asked me to be a model in his upcoming fashion show/ informational meeting, but I turned him down because there were going to be news reporters airing the show and the thought of my "secret life" getting out made me absolutely sick. Maybe I need some good head shrinking to work through this. I should be proud, not embarrassed. Sorry to vent, just wondering if any of you have experienced the same thing and how you've dealt with it. thanks for listening, Dawn

Hi Dawn.. i certainly understand your desire to keep things private, some things in life are not meant for everyone. Having said that... You are right that most people do have an ignorant uninformed opinion of WLS... however, continuing to deny that you have it, or hide the fact simply perpetuates that ignorance. Those people who think it is an "easy way out" need to be told the truth. I know this, Dawn, because i WAS one of those people. i thought that way for a very long time, and Thank GOD one day someone told me their story about their journey. Because of that one woman... I am 91 pounds down and have a new lease on life... not admitting to the surgery isn't shameful, but it can APPEAR that way to people who don't know better... be proud of what you did... go on TV and let the whole d@mn world know... you took charge of your life, and quite frankly risked your life, to give yourself a longer life. please don't think i am picking on you... i'm not... we all have lived in the fat world and know about shame and such... but we don't have to live there anymore... be proud of your WLS!!! best of luck Laurie 8/18 lap RNY -91 lbs