Clarification on Post-Respect What I am about to Say

One of the hardest things I am having a problem with is trying to express myself and hoping there is an understanding out there. From the various online Help/Support teams I belong to I have to tell you that some of the responses I have received from fellow post ops is appalling, as well as demeaning. I am really surprised about the lack of sensitivity, as well as the condemnation I have received. I am and always have been a very open and upfront individual. I do not get over emotional, and I am not wearing my heart on my sleeve. so,I hope what I am about to say is not offensive- but I need to speak my mind. A few days ago, I posted my feelings as well as concerns I had as a new post op. I was upset because I had surgical complications....I indicated that I can drink no problem, can take protein, no problem, however I can not do the broth, jello, SF product etc..... I also indicated that I was HUNGRY...not head hunger but REAL HUNGER....All of these things are real and something I am living through everyday. I want you all to know the following..... 1. I am not an idiot. I have not researched for over a year, and taken this route to self help with the intents of sabatoging my efforts. I know this is a tool, I understand self discipline, self control, and self respect. Please give me the benefit of the doubt of knowing these things. 2. My feelings are real If I tell you I am experiencing something, do not discount me. I am telling you it is happening to me. It is not anything less than what I am telling you. I have enough common sense to determine what is real and is not. Give me the respect and listen to what I am telling you. 3. My experience may not be yours. Obviously, I do not fit in the "norm" of this experience. For those of you who have experienced hunger, can eat, and have issues with SF products, broth etc...and you called me or side emailed me... I want to thank you THANK YOU for sharing with me personal things they have experienced, and to let me know that what I feel is valid. THANK YOU THANK YOU! 4. I have a goal to succeed just like you! Just because my experience is different than yours, does not make how I approach my issues wrong. I am suppose to be injesting 69 grams of protein a day. My diet is mostly liquid, I definately am not getting in half the food or caloric intake needed per day. I definately am not getting my 69 grams. However, what I can get in and how I get them in is as indivdual as you and me. DO NOT CRITICIZE ME OR CALL ME A FAILURE! . 5. Everyone goes through this process differently... And that is the key to all of this.....I am different and my experience is going to be different from everybody else here. Each experience from each person is a learning tool and can be used as such. Please do not criticize me without knowing what I am going through. The reactions I have received on some of the Boards almost made me want to just some folks and say the heck with this. However, some true Friends have told me that my opinion and expressing my differences mean something as well. With that said- Please know that I know everyone Post-Op and Pre-Op is just concerned. I , respect, and appreciate everyone here. I just need you to understand how I feel. Denise

Denise I am sorry that you received some negative responses to your post. I think sometimes the older post ops forget the struggle they went through at the beginning. I know your problems are real and for some of us its not easy to get this thing going. I am at the stage now where over a week of creamed soups I can't bear to face another 1.4 cup of it. I am supposed to be on this creamed soup and yogurt for another two weeks then I can start the pureed. Even more depressing I stepped on the scale this morning and am up a pound after not losing for the last two days. It is definitely not an easy journey but we will make it. Hang in there. Patty

Denise, I am so sorry that after all you went thru when you came to get support you were critized. I read your post but did not respond because I'm not quite there yet. I did say a prayer for you and greatly appreciated the information, because now I know if it happens to me I'm not Thanks again for sharing your experience, I , greatly respect, and appreciate you as well. Have a great week! ~Felicia

Dearest Denise I am so sorry that you received some negative responses to your posting feelings are not good or bad they just are and I know that the purposes of this site is to give people 24/7 support that we just don't get from family, friends or the healthcare system. I had my surgery 8/9/04 and I had to be readmitted because of blood loss. I am currently struggling with taking in the protein, and eating even soft foods. The thing that is sustaining me is this forumn and whenever I feel overwhelmed I just go on line and it helps. Please continue to share your experiences. Alll of us who have had the surgery regardless of the amount of weight loss we achieved are not faliures. we identified a problem and and are works in progress in solving it. Cheryl