Tell Me I'm not Losin' it
Ok, I'm two weeks pre-op, so it's natural for me to be a raging, emotional wreck right now, isn't it? I am either having one of my all time worse days, or somebody needs to double the zanex dose here. Let's take a look at my day thus far.
Stating it off with a bang was the game of fetch I played with my noble steed Aldo. Fetch being his favorite game, he plays most vigorously and with much enthusiasm. With all the sticks aflyin' and whatnot, man's best friend mistook my upper arm for the object of his attention. Which in turn left me with much pain and discomfort, and with a wound that would give the faint of heart a case of the vapors. Some folks would say it doesn't get much worse than having your dog bite you. They would be wrong.
My brother (bless his heart) asked to park his car in the extra bay of my garage. I gave him a thumbs up, but told him it had to be cleaned out first. He and my sis-in-law worked most diligently on the project while I was at work, cleaned it out,(I have no idea where all the "treasures" I had stored there went, and I'm kinda scared to ask) and even did some decorating, hanging some beer signs, etc. that I hadn't gotten around to doing myself. I discovered today that he also "hung" (via a staplegun) several concert posters that I had been storing out there. *Gulp* I had intended on framing most of them, some of them being first additions, and quite spendy. I paid $30 extra to have one of them signed by the artist.......any guesses where the staple on that one is? You got it, BAM right through the old John Han****
Now this was an innocent mistake, they thought they were doing something nice for me........they WERE doing something nice for me. But all I could see was the guy on the Antique Roadshow ten years from now saying, "Pity. This is in such good condition. If it weren't for those staple holes, this would easily fetch $5,000." And I privately went berserk.
To top off my little stroll in the park this afternoon, I ran into an old friend. Someone who up untill a few months ago referred to me as the "best friend she's ever had." Actually I kind of sought her out, thinking maybe we could work at righting some of the bad vibes we've had lately. But I've apparently gone from her best friend to something more akin to pond s****ince I rated a cold "hello" and little else before she walked out the door without saying another word.
I should imagine that on ANY given day, none of these events would leave me feeling particularly thrilled, but right now, I feel like a walking time bomb. Fear, anxiety, remorse, grief, so many emotions whirling around in my tiny little brain. I feel like my head's going to explode.
God I need a cigarette.
Any words of comfort, most welcome.
La-
I'm so sorry you've had such a rough and frustrating day!! I too have days when I feel like my head's going to explode.. fortunately, it never does!! I don't have any advice to offer except that from what it seems.. it can only get better. I'm here if you ever want to chat - just an email away!
Heather 
sweet dreams...zzzzzz.... Most Active
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