The party is over.

I had my rny surgery in August 2001. Lost 96lbs. I have been struggling since 2003 to keep from gaining weight back. I have found that obesity is a disease and a large part of this disease is denial. Denial that my appetite is back, denial that I am gaining weight back, denial that I am eating uncontrollably, etc., etc., etc. I have gained back 27 lbs. of my weight loss. I have been on anorexic meds for the past 2 years to help control my appetite. I know that if I hadn't been taking these meds my weight would all be back on. If I only ate 3 meals a day and had only non-caloric liquids in between, I would never gain the weight back. My mind keeps telling me that if I just eat some small amount of candy, I can eat more small amounts of candy over a longer period of time and not get ill. My downfall before surgery was sweets. Also, before surgery I was a raging bulimic. I vomited 7-8 times a day eating tremendous amounts of food. Of course, it didn't help me to control the weight gain. It just added another addiction to me. Thank God that because of the surgery, I am not able to do that anymore. I never told my surgeon this because I thought he would not give me the surgery if he knew. The reason I am telling you all this information is that it might help people to share what is going on with them after their surgery before it is too late. There are many people out there that I personally know of who have put all of their weight back on and are too ashamed to admit it because they think they are failures. It is difficult for me to admit what is happening to me also but I know that by being honest with you it is making me be honest with myself. Hurt pride never killed anyone but obesity has. My husband has also had the surgery in March 2001. He was 507 lbs. He lost 200lbs. He actually felt skinny at 307 lbs. I have noticed that his weight is creeping back up. He went up a size in pants. He thinks the dryer is shrinking his clothes, water weight gain, he is not eating that much, etc. All symptoms of getting back to old thought patterns. Our surgeon said that this surgery is a tool and not a cure. He is absolutely right. It helped to get us healthy again. It took us only so far in out weight loss. Now we are having to do the very thing that we could never do before. Diet. If we could diet, we would never have gotten so overweight. I have found that for me, I must focus on what and why I am eating every day. I am never going to be cured but I must be forever vigilant. I have a friend who mortgaged her home to have the surgery. She not only gained all of the weight back but now has a mortgage on her home. I have tried to start support groups in the past but the surgery was too knew in our area and people thought that they didn't need one. I am praying that those who are in danger of gaining the weight back will contact me to start one. Please, please do not be ashamed that this is happening to you. I understand. I am one of you. Sorry for the long message but it took a lot of courage to admit all of this.

Hi Mary Not only is our(mine and my husbands)party over,it is clean-up time!!!!!!!! I share most of the comments you posted. I am starting to gain and so is my hubby who had wls as well. we are falling back into old patterns of eating and most times do not even try . I have a lot of joint pain still so I am not as mobil as i need to be. I could do better. I am in more control than my usband , but he like to feed me and bring home fast food or eat out. I have a hard time when eating out because I get sick. I would love to be in you support group. there is a group about 45 miles from me and i don't want to make the trip there/ if you decide to start one please let me know. The support will help, just being honest and accountable to oneself willmake allthe difference in the world Cathy(aka Mary)

Mary, First of all, it is true that most of the people that have this surgery gain some weight back. However, from what you said, you didn't lose as much as you should have in the first place. Sometimes, when that happens, there are reasons that are beyond your control. Sometimes, there's something wrong with the pouch and you need a revision. I would go to my original GB surgeon and get an x-ray of the pouch to make sure everything is ok before you just blame yourself for the weight gain. I also had my surgery in 8/01 and I've struggled also. I know if I don't stick to the protein regimen I will gain back as much as my body will let me. However, I really think there could be something wrong with your pouch in your case. Please consider what I've said and God bless you on the rest of your journey!

Hi Mary. God..I feel your pain! I am alos a re-gainer. Its SO frustrating!! I had my open RnY also in Aug of 2001. Top weight was 295. So..here it is, five years later, and I am STILL fat..only not as much so, at 221. I go up and down the SAME 5 pounds for THREE years now! Some days I can eat a lot..some days I rarely feel like eating at all. I have an active job and am often on my feet 11 hours a day. I am a single mom with two busy kids.....got separated ( second marriage) two years ago. My goal is to weigh about 150-160. I jst always wonder if it will ever happen. I RARELY eat sugar...but can still dump from certain foods, and I swear my bowels have never been the same! Oh well...I am just ranting and raving. I just wanted to tell you to take heart, for you are not alone! I love getting email so please feel free..ANYTIME! Lisa in CT ( [email protected])