2 years out!! Regaining!!

11/11/03 Well I have past the two year mark. At times it seems like yesterday and at others it seems like forever ago. Anyway I am still doing great. I have not thrown up once, have not been in the hospital or had any problems whatsoever!! PRAISE GOD!! I now weigh 133 pounds. I must say that I look better, however, I am VERY AFRAID that I am going to put the weight back on!! What is the MOST BIZZARE about this whole thing is that now my husband and I are seeing a therapist to help us heal from emotional scars from this surgery. One, because I was so sick and literally dying for 9 months he cut himself off totally from me. I was alone. I was sick. He was alone. He was a single parent. We slept apart. We were apart. Now he hears..."I bet you LOVE the new Shelly" actually, he does not. He didn't tell me this until recently because he was afraid of hurting my feelings (he such a good man) but now I remind him of a skin and bone, saggy skin grandma. And that has affected our sex life. I highly recommend any book by Michelle-Weiner Davis. She is a solution-based therapist and she is awesome. She gives you tools to reconnect with your spouse. Bill and I are committed to each other through thick and thin (how ironic) and this too shall pass. We are on the road to recovery and are doing much better. I only wish someone would have prepared us for the emotional hurts that possibly could affect our lives. If we weren't committed to each other we would have divorced. And alot of people who have had this surgery or lost a lot of weight some other way have split from the relationships. There are many reasons why and these need to be addressed. I hope my bio will open your eyes and educate you to make the best decision possible and to prepare you for the "worst." The worst may never happen and that would be great BUT if it does then you are as ready as you can be. May God bless this journey you are on!!! Blessings................Shelly Elliott

Wish for you the very best. I know that being single you may not feel that I understand, but I do have to learn to reconnect with myself and it has not been easy. As I look back on where I have been the last two years I can't believe myself. I looked at a family picture taken of me, my brother and sister and I was wondering who that stranger was standing there with my family, couldn't even recognize myself. And now, I am coming to terms with that stranger and my kids are feeling that they lost their mother, glad they are grown up and they have to deal with it. We loose some, a lot, and we all have to regain. Mary Driever