13 days and I am getting nervous

Good morning everyone,

I usually post on the California boards, but I thought I needed to get support from this board. I was approved for surgery this past Wednesday (7/15) and given my surgery date for Friday 7/31. I have a great support system of sucessful post-op people and some family. Why then do I feel so nervous? I know they tell me its perfectly normal to have some anxiety. And I want to recieve this gift, this tool that I have waited so long to have. I understand the operation is on my stomach and not my head, but what if I fail? What if I die? What if I don't recieve the support I need afterwards to push through?
I would never change my mind about the surgery. I am a strong believer that all things happen for a reason, and for this---I say what is to be, will be. So, if I make it through-- it was ment to be. I can however stop the negative thoughts of failing. I want to, but I just can't seem too. I feel so much less than the people that I meet and talk to on the boards. They are all sucessful in their WLS. Many are at goal or within arms reach of it. I don't see them physically ever being the weight they say they were. They are my inspiration, but what happens if I am not as sucessful as they are? What if I end up stalling after losing 40 pds, which will still put me over 200 pds? Will they view me different? Will the friendship I have been offered still be there?
I am sorry I took so much space to put this on your board, but I really wanted some input. Thank you for taking the time to read this rambling post. If you are able to respond, I will send you a special thank you!!
Hugs & friendship,

Hello Michelle,

I was getting nervous too (when I was about two weeks out).  chatting to all of the great people in OH really helped.  My surgery is July 21st.  about five days ago this calm came over me. i'll keep you in my prayers.  You WILL do great.

God Bless,

Chris

Thank you Chris,

Everybody needs prayers. I am a strong believer of them. I hope that I get that calmness too. I will keep you in my prayers on Tuesday. I know you will do fantastic. Thank you again my friend. I am sure your wife is a little nervous, I know my husband is, too.

Hugs & friendship,

Think positive!!! If you set yourself up to fail you will fail!! We are our own worst enemy in this journey, we are good at self doubting, self sabatage, and self distruction how about starting the self love self afirming and self confidence route that we some how manage to forget about!!  I am having surgery on the 21st(teusday) and yes I am nervous but not about failing (because failure is not an option) I am nervous about the pain and the recovery but I know that I have God on my side and he will not give me more than I can handle!!  Good luck and I wish you well God Speed
 

Thank you Angela!

Failure isn't an option, is it? I will do the best I can. I guess my worry isn't with the surgery either. Its the recovery and being strong to stay to the regemin. Too often I have seen post-op people that don't have "dumping" and can do some sugar. I don't want that to happen to me. I want to be strong and not even try the "bad" foods. I have God on my side and He does give me more than I can handle, but He is there right beside me. I have to trust in Him and lean on Him. Thank you for your response. I will keep you in my prayers, as well Angela, on Tuesday. Good luck and God Bless!

Hugs & Friendship,

Keep your head up Michelle and continue to focus on the prize which is YOU being healthy. I have some of the same feelings too because I have never had surgery in my life however I am just trying to stay busy and lots of prayer.  

Thank you so much. I appreciate your words. I do have to look at the long term outcome. And I have the power to do this. Prayer definatley helps. I will say prayers for you on the 29th. I am sure you will have an uneventful surgery and a speedy recovery. Good luck and God Bless!

Hugs & friendship,